Cae Green

Kendrick Lamar- Source: Astrida Valigorsky / Getty

ONE Musicfest is following up last year’s sold-out festival with Kendrick Lamar, Janet Jackson, Megan Thee Stallion, and more for 2023.

Festival season is in full swing and if you think you’ve made your plans and can sit back and relax, WRONG. ONE Musicfest came in like a thief in the night and dropped a massive line-up for 2023. The line-up is so good you’ll have to take your spouse, your mother, the kids, and maybe even Grandma. ONE Musicfest 2023 will take place on October 28th and 29th at Piedmont Park. Headliners for the festival will be Kendrick Lamar, Janet Jackson, Brent Faiyaz, and Megan Thee Stallion. If for some reason that alone isn’t enough to get you to attend the supporting acts will get the job done. Key Glock, TEMS, Kodak Black, Killer Mike, Bryson Tiller, Nelly, KRS-ONE, Too Short, Waka Flocka, Trina, Goodie Mob, Jadakiss, The Dream, and more are on the line-up.

This is not a drill! 🚨 #OMF2023 featuring Kendrick Lamar, Janet Jackson, Megan Thee Stallion, Brent Faiyaz, 50 Years of Hip Hop and an once in a lifetime lineup are coming on Oct 28+29th 🔥 pic.twitter.com/p8I3EfwT7t

— ONE Musicfest (@onemusicfest) July 12, 2023

You can grab your tickets from the official website here before ticket prices increase. General Admission early bird bands have already sold out so the clock is ticking. Last year attracted over 50k people and this year won’t be any different. Don’t get left out and end up watching from Instagram when you could get tickets NOW.

ONE Musicfest just dropped a monster line up! Kendrick Lamar, Janet Jackson, Megan Thee Stallion, Brent Faiyaz and more! Last year tickets sold out. They definitely will again. Meet us in Atlanta for @onemusicfest and grab your tickets asap. pic.twitter.com/3QWaxl8eSI

— Everything Georgia (@GAFollowers) July 12, 2023

Following the release of this third studio album, This Is What I Mean, U.K. rap star Stormzy has sat down with Apple Music's Zane Lowe for an exclusive interview on what the future holds for the 29-year-old musician.

After much anticipation, Stormzy's latest album dropped last week. He kicked off the album campaign with the no-holds-back "Mel Made Me Do It" visual, which, unfortunately, doesn't feature on the album. Soon after, Big Mike dropped "Hide & Seek," the album leading single that taps into past romantic affairs and his rocky relationship with unrequited love.

However, since joining the 0207 Def Jam family -- the label fellow rapper Wretch 32 is Creative Director of -- Stormzy has expanded on a lot of the gospel, and heartfelt feelings that were explored in his past two albums. The latter mainly focuses on Black excellence and how those of color are represented in the media. But along with this, he also deep dives into the ton of expectation that has been left on his shoulders, and what he intends to do to stand up for what he believes in.

This Is What I Mean as a whole is also a very low-tempo record, something different to the two previous LPs -- with the last albums featuring hard-hitting and club-ready tracks such as "Wiley Flow" and "Big For Your Boots."

But, with this in mind, Stormzy's exclusive chat with Zane Lowe breaks down why this is the case, along with what the future holds for him as a musician. Furthermore, Stormz also comments on the physical and mental strain it takes for him to make music and how he doesn't think he will be able to do it forever. Speaking to Zane Lowe, Stormzy said:

"What it takes for me to make an album is so emotionally, mentally, and physically taxing that it's unsustainable. So every time I go to make an album, I'm going to get in this hole of depression, overwhelmingness, and pressure."

You can watch the full interview with Stormzy and Zane Lowe above and in other news, listen to Stormzy's new album in full.

Read more at Hypebeast

Following in the footsteps of past recipients like Thom Browne and Diane von Furstenberg, Pyer Moss' Kerby Jean-Raymond is the latest designer to receive the Pratt Institute's Fashion Visionary Award. Having already scooped 2018's CFDA/Vogue Fashion Fund, the Pratt prize is only a further acknowledgement of Jean-Raymond's impressive design acumen.

With recent collaborations running the gamut from Reebok to Future to Hennessy, Jean-Raymond has proven himself as a well-rounded talent, deserving of the Pratt Institute's nod.

"It is an honor to receive this award from such a prestigious fashion institute such as Pratt," said Jean-Raymond in a statement. "My team and I strive to create designs that challenge social narratives and evoke dialogue. This award proves that we are on the right path and encourages us to continue using our platform to tell stories through our clothing."

Dapper Dan will present Jean-Raymond with the award on May 9 when the Pratt Institute hosts its latest round of student runway presentations at New York's Spring Studios. The 120th edition of the school's event is dubbed "LOCAL" and will highlight a selection of work from the school's graduating senior students.

Most recently, Pyer Moss was nominated for 2019's CFDA Awards Menswear Designer of the Year.

Click here to view full gallery at HYPEBEAST

Steph Curry Breaks NBA Record For 3-Pointers Made In A Game With 13

Steph Curry failed to win an NBA Championship last season after having a 3-1 lead on Lebron James and the Cleveland Cavaliers, but last night, he won the 3-point “championship” (ring not included) when he drained 13 trifectas against the New Orleans Pelicans.

Watch each and every one of them in the video below.

En fuego.

Image via AP

After Apple announced their new fully wireless AirPods along with the iPhone 7 last week, many voiced their worries about losing the wireless headphones. Case maker Spigen has created a solution to those worries, in the form of quite literally, a strap made specifically for AirPods. In addition to keeping your AirPods yours the AirPods strap is designed to be compact, lightweight, and durable. Head over to Spigen to purchase a the AirPod strap for $10 USD now.

Click here to view full gallery at Hypebeast.com

"Empire" star Taraji P. Henson opens up to UPTOWN about making her mark in Hollywood and building her own empire--after she checked her ego about being jealous of other actresses.  Meanwhile, LeBron James covers The Hollywood Reporter and talks about extending his brand (and success) into a slew of Hollywood projects, plus that "cop talk" he had to have with his sons.  More inside...

YBF starlet Taraji P. Henson covers the Feb/Mar issue of UPTOWN where she stars in an super sexy pictorial (captured at her Hollywood home) and shot by Gomillion & Leupold.

In the mag's accompanying article "The Empire Taraji P. Henson Built," Taraji, in her surprisingly candid way, talks about race and diversity in Hollywood, a visible shift in television opportunities for Black actors and her hit show "Empire".  And the show's critics.

Check the highlights and more fabulous pics...

On "Empire" Exposing "Black" Issues: "That’s what art is supposed to do: expose this shit. You know, we’re dealing with subject matter that’s not really dealt with...so let’s lift the carpet up and deal with this dirt. It’s not like we bashed Barack Obama and the show went off. No, Lucious Lyon (Terrence Howard) jumped in his [son’s] ass. That’s real life stuff. So I’m glad you’re mad."

On Being Cookie Lyons: "Cookie is a lot. She wears me out but I know this woman. I’ve done my research inside and out. I took Cookie from Lee and made her my own."

On Black Actors Making Moves On The Small Screen: "It feels good that there’s not just one black person. I don’t like that we get fixated on one or two at a time, or three at a time. If you look at Caucasian Hollywood, every year there’s a handful of new faces you’ve never seen before, then after that, they got five movies coming out and they’re introducing you to more talent. So I’m just so happy to see what’s happening on television right now. We have options and that’s how it should be."

On Jealously and Putting Her Ego in Check: "I used to have this crazy thing with Amy Adams...You see her [consistently] getting nominated, as she should, because Amy does good work. But, it’s like, ‘Well, I did good work too.’ But if you choose to stay in that place then you become miserable. It’s a pity party and nobody cares. I’m human, so I’ve done it. But I check that because it’s ego and it’s the devil."

On Owning Her Success And "This" Moment: "I’ve come a long way from ‘Aye, that’s that girl from Baby Boy’ to now people know how to pronounce my name. But I’m just scratching the surface. For whatever reason, God gave me this life, and I’m not gon’ fuck it up.”

Also on newsstands... 

In a cleverly titled article, "The Next Decision" LeBron James sat down with The Hollywood Reporter to discuss his next decisions and they don't involve basketballs (unless you count his tv show "Survivor's Remorse").

With his Spring Hill Productions (named for the housing complex he and his mom moved into when he was in sixth grade) he's quietly developed a growing portfolio of TV and digital projects which he OWNS and exercising creative control. They include the Disney series "Becoming"; the Starz scripted dramedy "Survivor's Remorse"; the reality show "Uninterrupted" for Turner's digital platform Bleacher Report; a trivia game-show pilot for NBC and a series show on CNBC. There's even talk of a "bucket list" for Esquire.  Clearly....King James won't end up on some ESPN show as a broke athlete....unless he's the executive producer. #catchit

LeBron explained that a large part of Spring Hill Productions is about creating jobs and opportunities for deserving artists.  "For me to be able to create jobs and opportunities for people...that means a lot to me."   Read the full article here and check out some highlights:

On retirement: I look at some of my peers, Tim Duncan and Kobe Bryant and Kevin Garnett, guys I've looked up to my whole career, and they're almost done with their careers. So you think about it for sure. You know at some point that will be you."

On the shooting of 12-year-old Tamir Rice by Cleveland cops: I have those conversations with my boys," he says. "They have tons of play guns. None of them look real. We have Nerf guns that are lime green and purple and yellow," he says. "But I don't even let them take them out of the house.

On what he tells his boys about the cops (with Savannah James): "And the talk is, 'You be respectful, you do what's asked and you let them do their job, and we'll take care of the rest after. You don't have to boast and brag and automatically think it's us against the police.' I've had one or two encounters with the police in my life that were nothing. But sometimes you just got to shut up. It's that simple. Just be quiet and let them do their job and go on about your life and hopefully things go well." "For everybody," (adds Savannah).

 

Photos via Gomillion & Leupold/Martin Schoeller

SVOYA Studio have completed the renovation an apartment in Dnepropetrovsk, Ukraine.

From the designers

A spacious one-room apartment in Dnepropetrovsk has been successfully converted into a two-room apartment without losing the visual volume. The owners of the apartment are a charming couple who brought up and raised children and created a “cubbyhole ” with our help that combines cosiness with functionality and manufacturability.

The idea of the planning of the apartment is to transform the kitchen into the bedroom with the necessary works and join the loggia to the living room with the kitchen. At the customer’s request the kitchen is located along the panoramic windows, the dining room is situated in front of the kitchen that can accommodate a lot of guests. The sofa area in the ensemble with built-in cupboard is situated at the entrance to the living room.

Natural materials and the combination of textures of wood, marble and surfaces of grey walls in the living room and compound blue color in the bedroom were used in the interior finishing. The felt wall creates special comfort and warmth in the living room. The bright and rich coloring decor, lighting and the carpet brighten up the general moderation of space. But perhaps the most remarkable and valuable accent of the interior can be considered the painting by Anton Sokolov which creats warm atmosphere in the dining room. The bedroom looks fresh and crystal clear and the composition of the rack behind the bed gives peculiarity to the interior and reflect ideologically the positive attitude coming from the family of customers. Lighting plays an essential role in the interior. Design models of lamps transform the interior not only with the help of light but also with the help of color.

All furniture was chosen given both maximum comfort and pleasant tactile sensation.

Design: SVOYA Studio
Design team: Denis Sokolov, Valeria Sokolova, Tatyana Lazovaya, Julia Martinenko and Artem Martinenko

Photography by Tatiana Kovalenko

Madrid-based artist, Javier Laspiur has dedicated a nostalgic photo series paying tribute to his video game history depicted through controllers. The series begins with his very first console, the Teletenis in 1983 and concludes with the PS Vita in 2013. Each image is paired with a corresponding date that doesn’t reflect the console’s year of release but rather the year Laspiur purchased it. Check out the series below.*

*Whoa, dude has super hairy arms

The post Video Game History Visualized Through Controllers appeared first on MASHKULTURE.

LenVEVO

It may not technically be summer yet, but it’s not snowing anymore hooray! Now that you can actually roll down your windows, here are 25 songs to turn up loudly and lower your shades when someone attractive pulls up next to you at a red light. Oh yeah.

1. Spin Doctors – Two Princes

Why is the lead singer trying to get this girl to choose him and also insisting she buy him flowers?

2. Shaggy – It Wasn’t Me

Shaggy is either the best defense attorney of all time or the absolute worst defense attorney ever.

3. Nelly – Country Grammar

If “shimmy cocoa puff” means something sexual or illegal, please don’t let me know. I like to just pretend that Nelly really likes cereal and I don’t want that to be ruined.

4. Hanson – Mmmbop

I would’ve loved to have been in the room when the chorus to Mmmbop was written. Also, has anyone ever played it backwards? There has to be demonic messages in there somewhere.

5. 4 Non Blondes – What’s Up

I feel like the concept of this video was to take every single thing that screamed 90s and cram it into five magical minutes.

6. J-Kwon – Tipsy

When J-Kwon brags about having a fake ID, I like to pretend he got one so he could go with Zack and Slater to The Attic and dance all night.

7. Paula Abdul – Straight Up

Let me answer your question right now, Paula. Do I want to love you forever? Yes. Yes I do.

8. R. Kelly – Ignition (Remix)

Do I really need to explain why Ignition is the best?

9. OMC – How Bizarre

The greatest feature a car company could ever offer is to make a vehicle that instantly starts playing this song when your windows roll down.

10. Fall Out Boy – Sugar, We’re Goin Down

I will not apologize for my love of this song. Hi haters.

11. The Darkness – I Believe In A Thing Called Love

You can try to hit that high note on the chorus, but you’ll cough up blood before you actually get to that level.

12. Weezer – Beverly Hills

Without Googling it, what does the girl say over and over in the chorus? You can’t tell me, can you? No one can!

13. Len – Steal My Sunshine

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again; Steal My Sunshine is the best worst song of the 90s.

14. Third Eye Blind – Semi-Charmed Life

You will never find a more upbeat and charming song about drug addiction than this.

15. The Knack – My Sharona

Remember the cover to this album? The one with the girl in the white tanktop with no bra? Preteen me DEFINITELY remembers it.

16. Mariah Carey – Always Be My Baby

It’s impossible to be sad while this song is playing. I want it played at my funeral so everyone dances out of the service.

17. Eve 6 – Inside Out

Eve 6 found that perfect balance of rock and pop that wasn’t fluff, but also wasn’t Powerman 5000. A wonderful blend indeed.

18. Spice Girls – Say You’ll Be There

No one else thinks it’s oddly racist that the one black Spice Girl was referred to as Scary Spice? No one?

19. Dexys Midnight Riders – Come On Eileen

Listen to this song again and tell me it doesn’t sound like it’s ending at least three times then suddenly goes into another chorus. It’s like we’re being pranked.

20. D-12 – My Band

I’m fairly certain there are 415 different rappers on this track. Listen closely and odds are you’ll hear someone you know.

21. Color Me Badd – I Wanna Sex You Up

I have no idea what it means to “do it ’til we both wake up” but it sounds like a bit much. There’s no way you aren’t chaffing after a night like that.

22. Crazy Town – Butterfly

No other band has tried to look more hardcore while singing the lightest pop songs. It’s hilariously awesome.

23. DMX – Party Up In Here

The radio edit is the best because there’s so many inappropriate words replaced with sound effects that it sounds like the guy from Police Academy being murdered.

24. Lil Wayne – A Milli

Lil Wayne makes several references to the female anatomy that don’t make any sense whatsoever. Please kids, don’t go to Lil Wayne for your health questions.

25. Trey Songz – Bottoms Up

This is one of the top three Nicki Minaj verses of all time. The other two are Monster and My Chick Bad. Don’t argue with me on this because you’re wrong. 

The adidas Originals Hamburg is back this year and its now available in a duo of great looking colorways inspired by two of Germany's most famous football clubs. First up is a clean combination of white and red representing Hamburg SV, one of Germany's oldest clubs. The shoe features a white leather upper with red and off-white suede detailing, all sitting atop a gum rubber sole. Next up is the FC St. Pauli colorway, which comes through in a combination of brown leather and orange suede, again on top of a gum rubber sole. Look for the Hamburg SV colorway this Friday at select stockists including size? and be on the lookout for the FC St. Pauli colorway when it launches next month.

Click here to view full gallery at Hypebeast.com

Jay Z's old apartment recently came onto the market for $870,000 USD. Located at 560 State Street in Boerum Hill, Brooklyn, the two-bedroom duplex was allegedly used as a stash spot when he moved in between 1996-1997 as mentioned in his hit Empire State of Mind. The renovated space features wooden floors, white walls and stainless steel appliances as well as plenty of windows. Check out the original listing at Sotheby's here.

Click here to view full gallery at Hypebeast.com

Rena Schild / Shutterstock.com

I never think of myself as a powerful person.

Boys, An Anthology available in paperback here and eBook here.

1. A pair of jeans that fit you correctly in all the right places, lift the cheeks, and don’t stretch out into sad puffiness within two hours of wearing them.

2. A pair of boots that keep your feet warm and comfortable in the winter without giving you the upside-down corn dog look of Uggs.

3. Your signature scent. (But let’s be clear, perfume is expensive as hell, and no one should be expected to pay for that shit. Get your perfume sample game to the level where you are going six months deep on samples from ONE Sephora. I smell like Flowerbomb for zero dollars, AND I can carry it in my makeup bag with ease.)

4. A favorite book that you can always grab and re-read an excerpt from while curled up in bed. (Mine is Neither Here Nor There by Bill Bryson, for all zero of you who asked.)

5. At least one Lelo. (AKA Mister Steal Your Girl, AKA The Punisher.)

6. At least one or two tampons/pads, because a) you never know when you will be reminded of the circle of life on a dinner date and b) when a random woman asks you for one in the public bathroom, with that real look of “Please, stranger, I need your help,” you should be prepared.

7. A trench coat that both looks British-detective swaggy and keeps your shoulders bone-dry.

8. The friend who is going to tell you when you’re being completely unreasonable and terrible, and even take the phone out of your hands if necessary. (Real friends recognize when you’re in a sad text-spiral and shame you right the hell out of it.)

9. Ballet flats that support both your feet and your sense of style.

10. At least one completely insane accessory that you absolutely love and treasure, no matter how ridiculous it is in reality. My giant, bedazzled elephant brooch is something that the haters can pry from my cold, dead hands.

11. A playlist for when you are really sad, but want to get even sadder. (Note: if this doesn’t contain Jeff Buckley’s “Hallelujah,” to which you sob openly, it is not complete.)

12. The friend who encourages you to have those “fuck it” nights where you accept the fact that you will be the girls shaking in bandage dresses in front of the club. Becca always knows the right words to get you swigging out of a Deer Park bottle filled with vodka cran again.

13. A signature drink, for which you always have the ingredients on-hand. (Stoli Bluberri and soda with a twist of lime, AKA The Fire That Prometheus Gave To Mortals.)

14. Access to a bath every once in a while, even if you need to make the pilgrimage back to your parents’ house every trimester to make use of those Lush bath bombs.

15. Some Lush bath bombs.

16. A blazer for all occasions, the kind that both fits in a casually tailored way and looks neither overly-dressy nor inappropriately casual. Preferably in navy blue, but camel is also a very real blazer color.

17. Intimate knowledge of when your favorite stores have their good sales (like JCrew’s 40 percent off the sale price, which I would more or less Black Friday-trample people for).

18. Workout clothes that don’t make you feel like Kenny Powers.

19. A BRA THAT ACTUALLY FITS YOU, AND IT’S PROBABLY NOT THE SIZE YOU THOUGHT IT WAS. THIS IS IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE IT’S REALLY IMPORTANT. *FLAILS WILDLY*

20. A pillowcase that doesn’t irritate your face, because the one place we should be investing in terms of linens is where it is constantly grinding up against our facial skin.

21. Decent moisturizer for your hands, because if the hands are chapped, the booty’s not getting slapped. (I apologize for this, I have no way to make this fun or sexy, please moisturize your hands. Dry winter hands is a real thing and the great equalizer.)

22. At least one place where you can park your car in peace and just cry for a while.

23. A place where you have always dreamed of going, that gives whatever you’re working towards a tangible, real goal — of course, feel free to pin as many pictures/postcards of this place all around your workspace.

24. The perfect pair of black pumps.

25. A go-to hairstyle that requires minimal effort and yet doesn’t look like you’re 10 minutes out of bed from a hangover.

26. The playlist of songs that you always must listen to on “private session,” because some pleasures are too sweet/humiliating to be shared.

27. A group of girlfriends, because any girl who is “not like other girls” or “only has guy friends” because “girls are catty” is seriously missing out on some of the most beautiful friendships life has to offer.

I have a friend who used to go up to every woman he was attracted to with the same hook, line, and sinker. He chatted her up with friendly conversation, maybe offered her a drink or danced with her for a couple of songs and then if things were going well, he hit her with the question, “So do you have a man?”

His success rate with this approach was a Major League Baseball average at best (for all you non sports fans, a great season for any player is when they hit over 30%). As well intended as his ask may have been, it failed to hit the mark more than it didn’t and I had to tell him why. He never listened because he was stubborn, but maybe one of you guys out there who is reading this will hear me out as to why it’s almost never a good idea to ask a woman if she is single.

As I think I have said before on this site (I don’t feel like looking it up to verify this), asking a woman if she is seeing someone gives her an easy out. If she isn’t single, she doesn’t want to be reminded of that at all. Even if she’s happily single, when has a woman ever said out loud, to a man, “No, I don’t have a boyfriend, thank God!”

Never.

I always assume a woman has a boyfriend, but I don’t let that stop me. If I want to confirm, I’ll ask one of her friends for the inside scoop, but I don’t ask myself for the reasons stated above and because, well, I just think it’s good to have a filter. Assuming she has a man is what enables me to approach in an assertive but non aggressive way, that way if some barrel-chested guy with a shirt that’s too small comes out of the bathroom, he won’t try to slam my head into the bar. I don’t want my head slammed into the bar.

But the other reason this question is a waste of your time (and hers) is because even if she isn’t single it doesn’t mean she’s available.

Every woman has a team of guys from whom she is getting attention. I know this because I have been on multiple teams, assigned to multiple positions. Never think you’re playing tennis with a woman unless she says love out loud. Until then, understand you’re playing a team sport, and you are one man against five. If you want to be the MVP in her life, you have to, in the words of Waka Flocka, go hard in the paint and cross up every one of these following five jokers before she ever lets you score.

The Best Friend Who Won’t Give Up aka The Underdog
The only thing this guy has going for him is his tenacity. He does just enough to solidify his spot on the team. She always needs him for something, whether it’s a shoulder to cry on or a guy’s opinion on things. She would marry this guy if it wasn’t for the fact that he once slept with one of her best friends or some other handicap. But in five or six years, that won’t matter and they can very well end up together so watch it. He has mastered the fine art of putting forth just enough effort to remain interesting and fun but suppressing emotional effort for the sake of the long term game.

The Father, Uncle, Grandfather, or Brother aka The Coaches
Not every strong, confident woman I have met has a close relationship with the men in her family, but every woman I have met with a close relationship to the men in her family is strong and confident. There is absolutely no getting rid of these guys, of course. Your best hope is to be drafted by her and incorporated into the team, but even then you have to earn your spot. Remember, Michelle Obama vetted Barack Obama’s husband material credentials by asking her brother to take him out to the court and see how he works. But even before your big meeting with the men in her family, she’s giving them a scouting report about you and they are judging the hell out of you. Some guys are more flexible than others, but they definitely will draw an opinion on the most skeleton of facts. You better hope they don’t dissuade your lady from drafting you because they can and they will. They may be wrong, but she’s not willing to prove that to them the hard way.

The One Who Got Away aka The Injury Prone Guy
Usually this kind of person is used to describe a woman that was in a man’s life, but women have these guys too. This is not to be confused with the ex (more on him later). They never had a relationship. Instead, this is a guy with whom she had a super strong connection, but nothing ever came of it due to circumstances beyond their control. For example: Distance. This guy was noble enough not to get into a long distance relationship with her, but he never quit her cold turkey, so he texts her from time to time thousands of miles away. While you’re in tryouts, you better hope the team he’s playing on doesn’t let him go or explore free agency and he starts eyeing her hometown. That could be a nearly impossible situation for you to overcome.

The Friend with Benefits aka The Human Highlight Reel
Look, this guy is good at one thing and one thing only. Slam dunks (if I need to be more clear here, you’re probably already a lost cause, dude). She doesn’t like him for anything but that one thing. She only calls him for that one thing. She doesn’t do it often, maybe when she’s bored, maybe when she’s tipsy, but trust me, when she’s in a particular type of bind, he gets a call. When she wants some excitement, he gets the pass. He’s not great at anything else. He can’t shoot from the outside, he’s too lazy to play any sort of defense, and you can forget him ever passing the ball to someone else. All he does is score in a way that few others can. But you can score too, right? Say, “Yes I can” because you can. This is the pros, baby! If you got this far, it means you have the potential to dunk too. So maybe one night she decides to alley you the ball instead of him. That’s when you better seize the opportunity like Billy Hoyle (spoiler alert!) in the final game.

The Ex aka The Former Franchise Player
There’s two types of exes in a woman’s life. The ones she talks to and the ones she doesn’t. Either way, these guys are two of your most formidable opponents, but I insist you don’t worry about them. I mean, they’re good for something, but never forget, they’re exes for a reason, and the biggest reason of them all is she knew (or he knew) they were never going to get a ring together. Don’t let her past dictate your future with her. Worry about improving your game and being better for her instead of being better than him, because the latter may still not be good enough.

Now go get ‘em, champ!

30 Minutes: Hair washed, conditioned, dried, and now sitting in the chair waiting for the magic to start.

About to get a new “do” finally! This hair is in need of some serious T-L-C. Maybe when I’m done, I’ll go and get my nails did too! Lol, probably not, I’m going  to be so broke after this. It’s worth it though!

1 Hour: Hair being straightened/pressed/combed till death.

Okay, this shit needs to start sometime today. When is she going to stop combing my hair? Oh my God, if she pulls my hair one more time, shit is about to get real! [Hair gets pulled again. Your lady: “Oh did that hurt?” You: “No, I’m okay.”] Don’t cry. Don’t cry. Don’t cry. You’re a grown-ass woman, don’t cry.

2 Hours: Back of hair being braided.

[Whilst touching your hair] Oh my God, we’re not even a quarter of the way through. I’m going to die in this chair. I am going to be the girl who died while doing her hair….I AM SO HUNGRY. Why didn’t I eat before I got here? And I need to pee. No, I’ll hold it for as long as possible. More bathroom breaks, the longer it’ll take. Oh God, I am so hungry.

2 Hours and 45 minutes: Back of hair still being braided.

Why is there so much yelling? Why can’t everybody just use inside voices? Why do I feel like we’re not even a quarter way through yet? [Touches hair] ‘cause we’re not… OH MY GOD, I NEED TO TELL EVERYONE ABOUT THE LADY WHO STRAIGHT UP TOUCHED MY HAIR ON THE L YESTERDAY!

4 Hours: Middle of hair being braided (Plus brief bouts of combing).

Why hasn’t anyone invented a machine to get braids done in an hour? No, seriously, why? This chair is so uncomfortable. I think I am getting a neck sprain…Wait, why is she combing my hair again? Why is she asking if I’m in pain? OF COURSE I AM IN PAIN. Oh God, don’t cry, don’t cry. NEVER AGAIN. I WILL NEVER EVER EVER DOING THIS AGAIN.

5 Hours: Front of hair being done.

Honestly, I just want to go home. Forget this shit. I am tired. Maybe I can come in and finish it tomorrow. I need to eat and sleep and I still need to pee. Oh damn, I really need to pee. Can’t hold it any longer.

[Gets out of chair]

Damn, it feels good to stand…

6 Hours: Front of hair still being done.

You know what? I think I’m going to shave my hair off one of these days. Wait, what is she doing?  [Lady starts unbraiding one that she doesn’t think is perfect.] WHY IS SHE UNBRAIDING ONE. NO, IT’S FINE THE WAY IT IS. LEAVE IT ALONE. Dammit. Seriously, I want to shave my hair off.

6 Hours and 30 minutes: DONE!

My eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord… Wait, how much is she charging me for this again? Oh yeah, an arm and a leg. It’s okay, I don’t need to eat for the rest of the month.

Anyway, selfie time. 

1. Pizza Hut

2. Candy Crush

3. Target

4. Best Buy

5. Apple

6. America Online

7. Hot Pockets

8. Waffle House

9. Lego

10. Adobe

11. Hulu

12. Wii

13. Subway

14. Redbox

15. Coffee Mate

16. Cap’n Crunch

17. Chapstick

18. Youtube

19. Sun Chips

20. Wikipedia

21. Red Lobster

22. IKEA

23. Netflix

24. Elmer’s Glue

25. Fruit Stripes

You can find more honest slogans here.

1. RESUME FORMATTING MUST BE CONSISTENT.

Consistency is key, especially with your use of bold, italics, tenses and punctuation. Without consistency, your resume could be compared to someone with a hangover at an early business meeting — put-together at first glance, but sloppy and lack-luster once you actually take a look. And trust me, it will get noticed, and it will make all grammar-obsessive brains throb with irritation.

2. ONE-PAGE RESUME.

Entry-level resumes (and also those with less than five years experience) should be exactly one page. Not shorter, not longer, but exactly one page. So, play with your spacing and adjust your content.

3. DON’T SAY YOU’RE SOMETHING YOU’RE NOT.

If you claim that you’re detail-oriented but there are obvious mistakes on your resume/cover letter, including spelling a name incorrectly in an email, then you may need to reevaluate yourself and what you’re putting your name on.

4. QUIT WITH THE BULLSHIT.

When you claim that you are a “people person” and “easy to work with” on your resume, you’re actually just saying that you are really into yourself and also a bad writer. Use facts, describe the details of your work experience and what your roles were specifically. Touch on what you did to add value — that way, the “plays well with others” statement can be inferred.

5. OBJECTIVE STATEMENTS ARE SPACE WASTERS.

If you do an objective statement right, it can be beneficial; however, most of the time they are extremely generic, filled with bullshit lingo and take up valuable space. “I’m a professional. I am job hunting for a career in an excelling field. I am a robot.” It’s more important to address your skills and experience in greater detail, so save the objective statement for the cover letter.

6. RE-RE-REVIEW YOUR RESUME.

Check your resume four times, and then have someone else check it over, and then re-re-re-re-check it one or two more times days later. And then once you’ve got the final version, read it aloud to yourself. Think about what the company you are applying to is looking for. Your content should be customized, relevant and easily scanned. A mouth full of big words, convoluted sentences and meaningless adjectives (“I’m really great”), will ruin you. So PROVE it.

7. USE A GROWN-UP EMAIL ADDRESS.

Whether it’s just listed on your resume or you are sending out professional communications, you must have an email address you would be proud to say out loud. Email addresses like, “Hotchick69@aol.com,” “surferdude@aol.com” and “CrAzY4CaTs@aol.com, will break you, so stick to the name-based gmails or even hotmails or yahoos.
People will stereotype you based on your email address, especially if you are applying to the marketing world. We are all about what’s new, especially in the tech field, and AOL screams 1998. I once had a candidate’s email hit my inbox with an AOL address and the subject line of, “Hello.” I thought it was some sort of meet-singles-in-the-area-late-at-night weirdo porn stuff. I almost junked it before I realized what it actually was.

8. COMPLEMENT WITH SOCIAL.

If recruiters like your resume, they will stalk your digital profiles. Make sure all of your social sites represent you to the highest degree and the career you are going after. So, take down your slut shots, your sloppy drunk party photos and make sure your LinkedIn profile says what career you’re going after (it’s basically an extended resume and generalized cover letter, so take advantage).

9. NETWORK.

Use your connections to get an introduction, but that’s not an excuse to be lazy. Your connection is doing you a favor, so do them one in return and don’t be an embarrassment for the both of you. Go above and beyond to show your worth — after all, this person stuck their neck out for you for a reason.

10. DO YOUR HOMEWORK.

It’s all in the details. Know who you are contacting – find them online and learn about them as a person, research the company’s website, read the job description and tailor your resume/cover letter to mention specifics. Recruiters get hundreds of resumes, and you need to go the extra mile to stand out.

11. IF YOU’RE AN UNDERDOG…

Let’s say you graduated with a degree in Philosophy or another major that leaves you in a tough post-grad position. Since philosophers are not a real thing,* you should not leave the big decision of figuring out what career to pursue until college is over. You can’t just randomly throw a dart at a wall of career categories, land on something and then go do it — definitely not in this day and age.

*kidding

If you do graduate without any sort of plan, it will be okay. You need to have a heart-to-heart with yourself, figure out what you like to do, and then start from the bottom. I recommend getting an internship, joining relevant organizations, following thought leaders on social media, attending networking events and finding a mentor. Your dream job is not going to fall in your lap. You have to work for it, and you have to really care. It won’t be easy.

12. A COVER LETTER IS A MUST.

Send a cover letter no matter what. Whether it’s an email or an attachment or an actual letter, you HAVE to write one. And don’t just write, “Hello, thank you for reading my resume. I have a degree in bullshit but would like to pursue marketing.” No one wants to read that. Copy/paste or insert-name-here, generic emails are meaningless. What makes you interesting and what sets you apart?

COVER LETTER OUTLINE:

1. Introduce yourself. Go over the basics of who you are and what you do.
2. Why marketing (or whichever industry)? What makes you passionate?
3. Why are you applying at this company? Get specific – do your homework.
4. Why are you a good fit for this position? Mention specifically which position you are going after, and include it in the subject line of your email. Some recruiters are filling multiple positions across the country, so make it easy for them to know what you want.
5. Close — Sum up your thoughts. End with something like “Please feel free to reach out to me with any questions, and thank you for your time.”

Be creative, show yourself off, and don’t forget to customize your message to whomever you are talking to. Touch on your achievements specifically and how you would be a good fit at XYZ Company. Show your passion and be confident — with just a hint of cocky.

JUST SO YOU KNOW…

You aren’t expected to know what you want to do for the rest of your life when you graduate college, but you need to have a short-term plan to get you by. Life is full of short-term check points that all lead to some mysterious and elusive long-term goal that you don’t realize until later, but you’ve just got to fake it ’till you figure your shit out and find out what that goal actually is. The key is not letting anyone know you have no fucking idea what you are doing.

Just remember, companies want to hire good people who genuinely care about learning and who are dying to work with them. It’s more than a piece of paper, folks!

Let’s End The Speculation.

Jay Z’s celebrating his birthday today and while looking back on his illustrious career, he ranked his solo albums from best to worst. Four classics? Sounds about right.

1. Reasonable Doubt (Classic)
2. The Blueprint (Classic)
3. The Black Album (Classic)
4. Vol. 2 (Classic)
5. American Gangster (4 1/2, cohesive)
6. Magna Carta (Fuckwit, Tom Ford, Oceans, Beach, On the Run, Grail)
7. Vol. 1 (Sunshine kills this album…fuck… Streets, Where I’m from, You Must Love Me…)
8. BP3 (Sorry critics, it’s good. Empire (Gave Frank a run for his money))
9. Dynasty (Intro alone…)
10. Vol. 3 (Pimp C verse alone… oh, So Ghetto)
11. BP2 (Too many songs. Fucking Guru and Hip Hop, ha)
12. Kingdom Come (First game back, don’t shoot me)

lifetimes

Danish-designer Anne Boysen has created the Toward Sofa for manufacturer Erik Jørgensen.

Description

TOWARD is a comfortable sofa that allows the user to lounge in multiple ways. By merging the normal use of an armchair, a chaise longue and a tete-a-tete, the design emerged.

TOWARD is a base with a mattress and two back rests in different sizes. The two loose and interchangeable cushions further opens up for a versatile appearance and function.

To achieve a unique product with high aesthetics, a lot of consideration went into combining the color nuances and texture of the textiles chosen.

The sofa comes in three color combinations: light gray, dark gray and brown shades.

Design: Anne Boysen
Manufacturer: Erik Jørgensen
Photography: Kirstine Mengel

From me to Y.O.U comes Tito Lopez’s new street album. Guest stars include Trae The Truth, Jon Connor, The Futuristiks, Sha Money XL, and Mr. Porter. Download after the jump.

Download HERE

1. Checking in on an ex that isn’t over you, to make sure “they’re ok”

When you’re getting over an ex, time heals all wounds. Every time you “check on them” they remember how great it was to be with you. It sparks hope, if not ripping the wound open again completely. They are not your responsibility anymore, your job is to give them space, their job is to heal.

2. Having sex with someone because they bought you dinner/you went home with them/you’re already naked

I know it can start to feel like you’ve passed the point of no return, and they may even tell you that, but nope. Unless you are a sex worker and they have paid you, this is not your job.

3. Figuring out your whole life problem at 2am

How many nights to do you wake up (or worse, are STILL awake) at 2am and life just seems freaking overwhelming. You are just getting so old! And you haven’t accomplished anything! And you have bills! It is your job to figure your life out, however, this isn’t something that can be done all in advance, and especially not at 2am. Listen to calming music or download a sleep podcast. You’ll be in a much better position to start whittling your issues down in the am if you feel well rested.

4. Smiling at men on the street

When you’re walking down the street thinking about the day ahead of you or your problems with your roommate and a guy you hadn’t noticed before tells you you’re too pretty not to be smiling—it’s not your job to acquiesce. As hard as it may be for this guy to see a woman who isn’t thrilled to be in his presence, your only job in this situation is to walk down the street however you damn well please.

5. Being the mediator of every dramatic family situation

Your family is crazy. As the resident sane person it can be easy to step into the role of perma-mediator. You know how to talk your sister off a ledge when your mom tells her she needs to be nice to her boyfriend, or when your dad flips out because your younger sister is starting to act like a woman. Be a helpful person, sure, that is what family is for, but this is not your full-time job.

6. Living up to your parent’s expectations

You know what is your job? Living up to your own.

7. Convincing people of your opinion

Fun fact: we don’t hold our opinions simply because we’ve been presented with the most logical argument and accept it. We are informed by our life experiences, cultural narratives and our own personalities. Presenting a sound case to someone else isn’t going to cause them to jump ship from these things. Talk about your opinions because it’s cool to hear what other people think and helps you sharpen your own views, but you don’t need to win people over to your side to prove you are right.

8. Being universally adored

If you have a 100% approval rating in your life, something is suspect. A haters job is to hate, and if they can’t find anything to hate about you it means there’s nothing unique or special about what you are doing. You can’t be following your passions without ruffling someone’s feathers.

9. Having an infinite amount of time

If you’re working and have a social life or a family life you are probably already filled up with your time. People want you to volunteer, exercise 30 minutes a day, read a book every week and etcetera. Figure out what is valuable to you and do it, don’t feel guilty when you simply can’t attend your friend’s fourth spoken word showcase of the month.

10. Looking like you stepped out of a perfume ad at all times

It’s great that neighbor lady can walk in stilettos to the grocery store and gracefully carry her bags home with her afternoon Pilates arms. Good for her. It’s not your job to be in competition with her. If you need to wear sweatpants and flip flops because you have still have party tummy from the night before, knock yourself out. No shame in that game.

11. Never making a mistake

Whoever hired you, whoever you are in a relationship with, everyone in your life is aware that you are a human and that humans make mistakes sometimes. It’s not your job to be perfect, it’s your job to do the best you can.

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1. Current obsessions

Begins with: I am OBSESSED with…

and continues on to discuss Netflix series, new Starbucks orders we’ve just discovered, trends in patterns and colors, celebrity girl crushes, fictional TV characters who would be perfect for us, our cats/dogs, etc.

2. Favors

Begins with: Can I ask you a huge favor…?

and continues on to discuss the things that we kind of feel bad asking for because we don’t want to impose, so we initially propose the favor as being a lot bigger than it really is so that when you hear it you’ll be more likely to say yes and not think that we’re demanding.

3. Plans

Beings with: Wanna do lunch?

and continues on to discuss when we’re both free, the really cute new restaurant we just discovered in town that just opened, what we’ve been craving lately and how we’re Paleo/on a cleanse/eating kale all day and where the most delicious food for those needs would be located.

4. How much we have eaten over a given period of time

Begins with: Take these [food items] away from me.

and continues onto give plausible reasoning as to why we simply cannot eat anymore chips because in the last day we’ve eaten like 2,000 calories but we really don’t even care.

5. The ex’s new girlfriend

Begins with: I just… I feel bad for her, honestly.

and continues on to discuss how he downgraded, how, even though we’re not trying to be rude or anything, there is no way he’s going to do better than us, or theories as to why they could be dating: he was desperate to move on from me. It’s a rebound. It’s just physical, honestly. Do they even have meaningful conversations?

6. How we could look better

Begins with: “Stop, I don’t even have makeup on…”

and continues on to discuss how we are in sweatpants, haven’t showered and do not have an intense amount of cover up and mascara on and thus do not want to accept the compliment of “you look pretty” because we don’t want you to think that this is the best we can do.

7. Intense apologizing

Begins with: Omg I am soooo sorry.

and continues on to further discussion of things that we probably don’t have to be that sorry about but we don’t want to seem inconsiderate or anything and we didn’t really mean to upset you so we’re going to over-apologize just to make sure you get the idea.

8. Things we don’t care about

Begins with: It’s fine I honestly couldn’t care less.

and continues onto discuss just how much this thing does not affect our life in the slightest but we’re actually not completely convinced that it doesn’t so we’re going to keep repeating it until we’re able to sell it to ourselves a bit more.

9. Contemplating the unlikely

Begins with: Can you imagine?

and continues on to discuss an insane possibility that will most likely never happen but would be so crazy/funny/sad if it did.

10. Complimenting other people

Begins with: Stop. I love your _______.

and continues on to tell people about the things we are admiring/want you to offer to let us borrow (steal) and/or to just make you feel good and let you know that we’re diggin what you’re doin’.

11. Things we said we wouldn’t get obsessed with but did anyway

Begins with: I didn’t think I had anything to say either, but give Twitter a week and you’ll be addicted trust me.

and continues on to discuss the things that you initially thought were pointless but after caving you have discovered you can’t get enough of: Candy Crush, Twitter, Amanda Bynes.

12. The literal vs. the metaphorical, except everything is the former

Begins with: Literally…

and continues on to discuss something that we really want you to understand how much we are not kidding about so we will repeat literally so you know we are not exaggerating although it sounds crazy enough to think that we are. We are not. Literally.

13. Future weddings and children even if they don’t necessarily know if they want that

Begins with: Yeah, well, if I ever get married I will NOT do that.

and continues on to discuss the flaws in modern society, Kimye’s baby name, tacky wedding traditions, what we want the shape and cut of our dress to look like, who our bridesmaids would be and occasionally who we would marry.

14. Our attractive new flings

Begins with: Wait let me find a better photo.

and continues on to discuss their hobbies, accomplishments and what we’ve done together whilst flipping through Facebook photos and narrating what he/she is doing and who he/she is with in each one.

15. Being serious

Begins with: I am literally not even joking right now.

and continues on to discuss how we are somehow always under the assumption that people will not take us seriously so we need to really define what is a joke from what is not and this. is. not. even. a. joke.

16. Ridiculous things that could warrant judgment

Begins with: Don’t judge me but…

and continues on to discuss the crazy thing that we really want to tell you about but we’re a bit worried that you’ll be judging us in your mind and your facial expressions aren’t really indicating whether or not you are so to let you know we think this could possibly be judge-worthy we added the disclaimer.

17. Directions from the greater universe

Begins with: I’m sorry there is no way that is just coincidence. It’s a sign.

and continues onto discuss how the person that sat next to you on the train was wearing a red t-shirt and that’s the color and style of the shirt he was wearing when you first met him and these things don’t just happen so it obviously means something. 

18. Hair lengths

Begins with: It just needs to get a little longer.

and continues on to how we just really wanted to cut it and we liked it at first! But then we missed our long hair and it was difficult to put into a messy bun so it’s really impractical.

19. Clothing as it pertains to the weather

Begins with: I’m so excited to wear layers again/I’m so excited to wear sundresses and sandals again.

and continues on to discuss how said clothing items are more flattering than another season’s.

20. The pros and cons of buying something

Begins with: Yeah but when would I even wear it?

and continues on to list reasons that we really deserve this shirt and don’t care that we’re spending the money because we are strong independent women who earned it and deserve it and we can do whatever we want with it. And not to mention, it’s on sale, and we’ve been looking for something like this for-like-ever and it’s a staple! So it’s really worth investing in… Right? 

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BGD Architects have designed the Albatross Residence in Mermaid Beach, Queensland, Australia.

Description

Situated on an exclusive residential street, with only one neighbouring property to the north, the site adjoins extensive park to the south and absolute beachfront to the east. The residence successfully achieves its own oasis, by capturing beachfront vista and access whilst maintaining a private yet expansive pool and entertaining core.

This residence is designed to accommodate a growing family, multiple guests and frequent entertaining. Entry to the residence is via a recycled timber colonnade and gatehouse that grants covered access to both wings of the house. The street front facing wing accommodates guests generously with their own living area, kitchen and bathroom amenities, with a secondary stair linking to the main media, bar and games room below.

A wide glazed hallway wraps the central courtyard on both the ground and first floor giving scenic circulation past the main amenities whilst providing aesthetic flow, travelling the timber stair. Privacy is ensured and natural light is made abundant as the open tread stair is backlight entirely by opaque glazing. The centralised amenities assist easy access and circulation to ensure a well functioning home. Louvred glazing has been utilised throughout the home to control ventilation by natural breezes.

Twenty five metres of glazing capture the absolute eastern beachfront of the property. This expansive room is catered for by the marble and timber finished kitchen with chef’s scullery and abundant cold and dry storage behind. Multiple dining and living areas are defined by furniture and finishes allowing a fully transformable space if the function so requires. Entertaining the end of the room, a split faced sandstone wall is suspended over the flickering floor level fireplace, visually playing on weight and spatial elements.

The upper level upholds all of the ground floor’s quality and design functionality and continues play with material and space. All of the bedrooms afford beachfront orientation due to the broad width of the property, each with its own ensuite and walk in robe. The private master suite boasts views both the beach and the internal courtyard, yet achieves an intimate aesthetic through finishes and textures. Warm finishes and textures flow into the ensuite as the sandstone wall rises from the floor below to the angled glass skylight beared directly above the double shower. Running the length of the eastern façade, a sandstone tiled balcony allows the family to check weather conditions and enjoy the beach aspect throughout the day, consistently utilising indoor to outdoor spaces.

The internal and external palette of finishes of natural timbers and stone cohesively create a tropical, modern and comfortable ambience. External finishes of recycled timber, natural stone, and copper allow the property to further develop character over time. Tall mature trees matching the scale of the house are intentionally located about the property to frame the beach front, the main entrance and internal courtyard. Two palms boarder the swimming pool as the wet edge between graces the length of the timber colonnade softening polished concrete and rough stone finishes. Lighting of the landscape at night creates drama within the timber battens and palm fronds, backed by the ambient aqua glow of the swimming pool.

Architects: BGD Architects
Interior Designers: Sonia Hill, BGD Architects, Edge Design & Interiors, POD (FF&E)
Structural Engineering: Cozens Regan Williams Prove
Lighting Design: Tony Dowthwaite Lighting Design
Landscape: Nerocane
Building Services: MDA Consulting Engineers
Photography: Studio Ultra – Remco Jansen

Drozdov & Partners have designed the Water Patio House in Odessa, Ukraine.

Description

The visible proximity of the sea is enhanced with the mirror of the swimming-pool, which links together the whole space of the ground floor and the terrace. the flared space of the first floor opens towards the sea horizon through the owner’s sleeping-room and bathroom and shows a never-ending “marine” movie.

Design: Drozdov & Partners
Photography: Andrey Avdeenko

“I don’t have a Facebook account”

I am an invisible Facebook creeper who spends 11 minutes of each hour refreshing Twitter. Yesterday I pretended I’d never heard of the show How I Met Your Mother even though I watched half a season on a plane—even though there were two Kubrick films available for viewing. And a Fellini. And Game of Thrones. And I laughed. ‘Til. I. cried, man.

“I don’t eat meat”

I eat a lot of pizza. Like, tons of pizza. And chicken here or there when no one is looking—but only chicken breast—and maybe a burger because of my, you know, anemia. I love, love, love baby carrots in ranch dressing. And bacon doesn’t really count when it’s that finely chopped.

“I don’t have a television”

I have a $1,700 notebook computer and I once lost a week of my life in a Hulu-exclusive-series spiral and Bangs-videos vortex.

“I don’t drive”

I make $57,000 as a graphic designer. But I mostly spend money on 90-pound DJ equipment and rare German singles. And taxi rides to my DJ gigs when I can’t get a ride from my roommate’s girlfriend.

“I don’t define myself by labels like feminist”

I went to college with a feminist and she wasn’t very attractive. She also dressed poorly. Blech. But I definitely believe in equal rights for men and women and, like, any other gender and it definitely wouldn’t be fair if a man and woman did the same job equally well and the woman was paid less just because she was a woman.

“I don’t really read a lot of contemporary literature”

Hmmm, I was thinking I had this one but you are definitely going to win this conversation. I did, however, page through a New Yorker three weeks ago and I do, however, have at least three vintage-y copies of each Salinger novel. Or am I thinking Fitzgerald? Crap.

“I don’t know who Kim Kardashian is”

I am a liar. I tell lies. I am lying.

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This post originally appeared on The Tangential.

1. If you don’t point out your redeeming qualities, you feel they’ll go unnoticed. You are a person, not a product – if it feels like you’re constantly giving an infomercial type sales pitch to somebody so they’ll understand your worth, there’s a problem with that connection. The most logical solution is to get out of that situation quickly. Your value will never be more evident to an inappreciative person than through your absence. Perhaps when you’re gone they’ll realize your importance and for their sake, hopefully it’s not too late.

2. The majority of contact is maintained by you. You text first, you call first, you pass along invites, you push to maintain some type of interaction and it begins to feel like you’re a persistent gnat, more bothersome than embraced. It’s easy to remain in denial, pretending that their lack of initiative and endless supply of excuses are legitimate, but at some point you’ve got to recognize a one-sided effort and call a spade a spade.

3. Any length of time apart or with no contact is emotionally painful for you, whereas they are just fine. Absence typically makes the heart grow fonder, not forgetful or content.

4. You’re constantly disappointed by spoken I love you’s that sound so nice to hear, but don’t match their actions in the least bit. One of the most cliché, commonly used statements that still holds so much truth is “actions speak louder than words.” It’s nice to hear how someone feels, but it’s even better to be well aware of it through their actual showings.

5. One of the main reasons you’re still around is for the comfort… Even if it’s uncomfortable. I once had a recliner chair that I relaxed in daily for years and eventually it began to breakdown. Sure, there were small maintenance efforts that recovered it to some degree, but eventually it was irreparable, falling apart in several areas. I got a new recliner that was CLEARLY capable of offering quality seating, but I used the old one because I just felt snug there. I know, relationships aren’t the same as chairs, but for the sake of this metaphor, we have to make sure we’re not remaining in the same creaky, worn, tattered seat only because we’ve grown accustomed to it.

6. You reject the idea of better if it’s coming from elsewhere. There is a mindset people get firmly stuck in and for them, they know they deserve better but don’t care to do anything about it. You want better, but you only want it from that one person. Sure, so-and-so might offer you attention, affection and have tons of potential, but for some reason it’s not enough to pull you away from the lackluster effort of the person you inexplicably want. Turning down others who come with a great deal of hope for mediocrity (or worse), you’re not necessarily doing yourself justice.

7. Them being too busy is a thing that actually comes up. There just isn’t such a thing as “too busy” when it comes to two people who irrefutably want to see each other. Time and sacrifices are made when we actually want something in any aspect of life, relationships with people aren’t immune to that notion.

8. Reading through this has tugged at several emotions and you’re realizing that the shoe fits someone you know all too well. It sucks, but there are times in life that call for you have to put yourself first. This is one of them. You’re the one emotionally at risk and unhappy with your treatment, therefor you must do something to change the situation. 

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