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Graphic designer Teo Zirinis off Hands Off My Dinosaur has an ongoing series that illustrates problems of famous monsters from pop culture.





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Hal Lifson is in love with the year 1966. He believes it represents the high water mark for pop culture. Read the rest

Bautista Álvarez cualifica de "arribista" e “ignorante” ao ex vicepresidente da Xunta e militante do BNG e di que a súa iniciativa prodúcelle “vómitos”. Acúsao de encher o BNG de “polisóns” e “elementos” e mesmo lle recomenda dúas actuacións; "a do púlpito ou a do tiro”.

O Movemento Galego da Saúde Mental analizou as preocupantes cifras de suicidio no país este mércores. O seu voceiro Miguel Anxo García acusa a Administración de adialas con fins políticos. A teima da prensa de non informar de suicidios é outro dos temas desta entrevista.

A entrada A oliveira volve a Galicia apareceu primeiro en Campo Galego.

 
There’s no way that the director of Pink Flamingos

Ha muerto el escritor británico Terry Pratchett a los 66 años, “en su casa, con su gato durmiendo en la cama y rodeado de su familia”, según ha explicado su editor Larry Finlay. Pratchett es autor de 70 libros, incluyendo los 40 de la serie del Mundodisco: este universo plano y redondo se sostiene a lomos de cuatro elefantes que se apoyan a su vez sobre una enorme tortuga. Sus libros tienen una fantasía y un humor inconfundibles, que lo han convertido en uno de los autores más queridos por sus lectores. Cuando se ha conocido la noticia, Twitter se ha llenado de mensajes de condolencia, hasta el punto de que Terry Pratchett, #MiPrimerPratchett y Mundodisco se han convertido en trending topic en España. Hemos seleccionado a modo de pequeña muestra algunas de las frases que más nos gustan de entre las miles que escribió para sus decenas de libros.

El problema de tener una mente abierta es que la gente insiste en entrar dentro y poner allí sus cosas.

Cavadores, 1991.

La verdad quizá esté ahí fuera pero las mentiras están en tu cabeza.

Papá puerco, 1996.

A los dioses no les gusta que las personas no trabajen mucho. Las personas que no están ocupadas continuamente pueden empezar a pensar.

Dioses menores, 1992.

La gravedad es una costumbre difícil de olvidar.

Dioses menores, 1992.

Dale fuego a un hombre y estará caliente un día, pero préndele fuego y estará caliente el resto de su vida.

Jingo, 1997.

Si los gatos parecieran ranas, enseguida nos daríamos cuenta de lo desagradables y crueles que son esos pequeños bastardos. Estilo. Eso es lo que la gente recuerda.

Lores y damas, 1992.

Los músicos solían ir cortos de dinero; de hecho esta era una de las definiciones de la palabra 'músico'.

Soul Music, 1994.

Conseguir una educación era un poco como una enfermedad de transmisión sexual. Te invalidaba para un montón de trabajos, y entonces tenías la urgencia de pegársela a alguien.

Papá puerco, 1996.

Se le consideraba algo así como un intelectual porque algunos de sus tatuajes no tenían faltas de ortografía.

Papá puerco, 1996.

La historia tiene la costumbre de cambiar a las personas que se creen que la están cambiando a ella.

Mort, 1987.

Tardaría varios millares de años en producir algún efecto, pero esa no era razón para rendirse.

Tiempos interesantes, 1994.

Vimes asintió adustamente. Aquello también tenía lógica. Las cosas se hacían porque se habían hecho siempre, y la explicación era: "Pero es que siempre lo hemos hecho así". Un millón de personas muertas no pueden estar equivocadas, ¿verdad?

El quinto elefante, 1999.

Parece que no posees ninguna habilidad útil ni ninguna clase de talento, dijo. ¿Has pensado en dedicarte a la enseñanza?

Mort, 1987.

La lógica es maravillosa, pero a veces obtienes mejores resultados pensando.

El país del fin del mundo, 1998.

Conozco a las personas que hablan de sufrir por el bien común. ¡Nunca son ellos, joder! Cuando oyes a un hombre gritar: ¡Adelante, bravos camaradas!, verás que siempre es el que está detrás de la jodida roca enorme, y el único que lleva el casco realmente a prueba de flechas'.

Tiempos interesantes, 1994.

Te llamas diosa señora, y no sabes nada. Nada. Lo que no muere no puede vivir. Lo que no vive no puede cambiar. Lo que no cambia no puede aprender. La criatura más diminuta que muere en la hierba sabe más que tú.

Lores y damas, 1988.

En el interior de cada anciano hay un joven preguntándose qué demonios ha pasado.

Imágenes en acción, 1990.

La vida de una persona sí pasa delante de sus ojos antes de morir. El proceso se llama "Vida".

El país del fin del mundo, 1998. 

La vida es un hábito, resulta muy difícil dejarlo…

El segador, 1991.

ESOS QUE VES ALLÍ SON MORTALES, prosiguió la Muerte. ESTARÁN EN ESTE MUNDO APENAS UNOS CUANTOS AÑOS Y SE LOS PASAN COMPLICÁNDOSE LA VIDA. ES FASCINANTE. SÍRVETE UN PEPINILLO.

Mort, 1987.

"NO LO VEAS COMO 'MORIRSE', dijo Muerte, PIÉNSALO COMO UN IRSE TEMPRANO PARA EVITAR EL TRÁFICO".

Buenos presagios, 1990.

Los dos últimos tuits de su cuenta han aparecido poco después de que se conociera su muerte. No los escribió él, pero también podrían estar entre sus mejores frases:

(Terry cogió a la Muerte del brazo y la siguió a través de las puertas y hacia el desierto negro bajo la noche sin fin).

Just so we understand where this is going, let’s start by listing all the things that Card Crawl is not:

• Role-playing game
• Dungeon crawl
• Deep or heavy
• Easy

If you’re looking for a game that is those things, turn away. While Card Crawl puts on an RPG mask and presents itself as a dungeon-in-a-deck, it’s nothing of the sort. You’re character is merely a nameless card. You never level up. The challenges you face remain the same from game to game. What Card Crawl is, however, is a simple solitaire card game that is short, addictive, and has become my favorite new time waster.

Card Crawl has a closer connection to classic time wasters like Klondike or Free Cell than it does Baldur’s Gate. It is a solitaire card game with a static 54-card custom deck. That’s it. Like those classic solitaire games, your job is to get through the whole deck with no cards remaining at the end. Disappointed? You shouldn’t be, because it’s a fantastic design that fits that “I have 5 minutes to kill” niche that mobile puzzle games seem to fit into so nicely.

The deck of cards consists of 5 different suits: Weapons, Shields, Potions, Gold, and Monsters. The play area has two rows. The top row is the “dungeon” where new cards are dealt. The bottom row contains your character portrait, your “hands”, and your pack. Each turn you need to remove 3 of the 4 cards from the top row before the top row is refilled. So, if you’re dealt Shield, Sword, Monster, Gold. You might take the sword in one hand, shield in the other and put the gold in your pack. That would leave only the Monster and the top row would be refilled. Continue like this until the deck and top row are empty. Simple.

Only it’s not simple. You see, once you put something in your hands, you cannot remove it without actually using it. So, let’s say you are dealt a weaker sword that does 3 damage, a weak shield that can withstand 3 damage, a powerful healing potion that can restore 10 health, and 3 Gold. Sounds great! No monsters and a lot of loot to grab. So, you put the 3-Sword and 3-Shield in your hands and stick the potion in your backpack for later. New cards are dealt and you reveal a powerful blade that does 7 damage, 10 gold, and a shield that protects against 7 damage. Great! No monsters again except, wait, where do I put all this great new stuff? In the garbage, that’s where. You cannot exchange it for something in your hand–the only way to remove a sword or shield is by attacking–so you’re left with crappy equipment in your hands while you have to throw the good stuff away until you’ve cleared out 3 of the top row’s cards. Luckily, if you throw items away, they are converted to gold which helps your final score. If you throw away the Gold cards, however, the dealer considers it a tip and you’ll get nothing. That’s really the crux of the game, and it’s a brilliant push-pull mechanism. You want to trash items, because you want to collect as much gold as you can, but without those items you probably won’t survive through the deck, and if you don’t survive through the deck you collect nothing. That’s right, thanks for coming, you’ll get nothing and like it. So, do you trash that potion that heals for 9 and collect 9 gold, knowing there’s a potion that heals 10 still somewhere in the deck, or do you hold onto it in case a really bad creature pops up next hand? Will the deck be unkind and force you to trash goodies? Will you use up your weapons and shields, freeing up both hands only to get dealt 4 monsters that you can no longer defend yourself against?

Yes, randomness abounds in this game and there will definitely be games where you aren’t going to make it through the dungeon no matter what you do because of how the deck is shuffled. Many, many games end with an empty deck but one or two Monsters left in the top row and not having a way to handle them other than letting them attack you and take you below 0 hit points. Of course, each run through takes only a few minutes, which is part of the charm. I have yet to play a game of Card Crawl where I came up just short that wasn’t immediately followed by starting a new game and playing at least one more time.

I mentioned before that the deck of 54 cards is static. That’s not entirely true. 49 of the cards are identical each play through, but 5 of the cards represent your character’s special abilities. These are things like Sacrifice, which lets you damage a monster equal to the amount of damage your character has suffered, or Vanish which lets you discard everything from the top row and get dealt new cards. You begin the game with five, and can unlock more special cards by winning games and collecting gold. As you collect more of these, you can choose to play the game in a couple ways. Normal mode will randomly select five of your special powers, so you don’t know what you’re going to get, whereas Constructed mode allows you to select which five cards you want to take along with you. Both are fun, but I’m leaning toward Normal mode being my favorite. Something about not knowing which powers you have really shakes things up. Oh, and just in case you’re wondering, there is no IAP in the game, so the special cards can only be earned through playing.

Besides gameplay, the app is great to look at as well. The cards all have a hand drawn look to them and there are nice touches, such as your character’s portrait turning more and more skeletal as she takes damage. The main draw, however, is the ale swilling minotaur that’s dealing out the cards. Nothing will make you want to play another match quicker than his mocking laughter after you lose a match. I hate him and his entire bovine family.

If you can’t tell, I’m really in love with Card Crawl. This has taken the place of my other fillers like Threes or Rules, and I don’t see myself heading back that way anytime soon. There’s something about a solitaire card game that really does it for me, and Card Crawl is one of the best I’ve played. I hope, in time, that new decks and new powers are offered, but even without expanding the game, I can see Card Crawl taking up space on my iDevices.

Card Crawl was played on both an iPad Air and iPhone 5.

Pocket Tactics Rating: 5/5

[body_image width='1024' height='568' path='images/content-images/2015/03/12/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/03/12/' filename='jeremy-clarkson-and-the-war-on-british-dads-012-body-image-1426186556.jpg' id='35558']

Jeremy Clarkson's books. Photo via Flickr user Timothy Tsui

This article originally appeared on VICE UK.

Jeremy Clarkson has run out of cigarettes. He flips open the lid of his Marlboro packet with his thumb, the only thing inside is some limp silver paper. His expression grows even more hangdog than it was before. He's been involved in an altercation with one of the producers of his internationally beloved TV show, Top Gear. This has resulted in his suspension from the BBC, and has meant that this Sunday's edition of Cars and Casual Racism will not be aired, and neither will the remaining two episodes of the series. Jeremy Clarkson has, in no uncertain terms, fucked it. He has fucked it before—also in no uncertain terms—by being casually racist on his show, making gags about dead prostitutes, calling the Middle East the "ook-stan sort of countries," uploading a photo of himself sleeping on a plane with the words "Gay Cunt" and an arrow pointing to him next to his head. He is like a popular yet unruly schoolboy, always overstepping the mark but using his teacher's fond disposition towards him as a get-out clause. His SATS scores are high, and OFSTED are pleased.

He crumples the empty packet in his hand and walks outside his front door. He's met with the familiar yet jarring sound of a photographer's shutter, of people asking him questions they know he won't answer. "Just off to the job center," he quips. Of course, multimillionaire author, journalist, television presenter, and friend of Prime Minister David Cameron Jeremy Clarkson will only be going near a job center if he's driving a monster truck over it. Though he may be momentarily disgraced his career will no doubt recover, unless it emerges he called his producer a "fucking bent cunt" before laying into him, or something similar.

No, Jeremy Clarkson, though quite a reprehensible human being, clearly, is not bearing the greatest brunt of his suspension. That brunt is to be borne most heavily by the loyal viewers of his show, the readers of his books and columns. That brunt is to be borne by your dad, basically, and though he isn't showing it, he's really disappointed.

Your dad is tired. He feels like he's traveled through time in the last decade or so, and found himself in a future that doesn't want him. Everything he likes is lame, everything he does is boring, everything he says is problematic. He's not quite a relic yet, but he can feel his sheen oxidizing rapidly. The creep of the rust is showing everywhere; face, legs, arms, knob, eyes—nothing is exempt. But your dad will not be complaining about it. He will stuff it deep down into his brain and chest because that's what he's been doing since you were born. Since you came into the world his life has been one criminal disappointment after another, and you're not really helping with your themed club nights and sex politics at the dinner table. You've been exhausting him from the day you came into this world.

Work spurs him on. Work, in the latter days of life, transitions from a necessity that allows you to fund your party lifestyle, to a necessity that keeps you from losing your mind. You stop working and then what? Life becomes a painful series of standing up and sitting down. Each action aching more than the last, until your whole viscera is an agonizing metronome of clicks and strains.

But for one hour on a Sunday, your dad lives vicariously through Jeremy Clarkson. He watches an overweight man in his fifties drive Ferraris across beautiful landscapes, making racist jokes and drinking beer. Your dad is escaping to the only place he wants to escape to: inside of Clarkson's brain.

And now that trivial release is being taken from him. Taken from him like so many other things. Smoking in pubs, affordable pints, soccer, which is now on about 17 different channels and costs about $1,500 to have. For us, the young, these things are irritating, but bearable. We have the wherewithal to say, "No, that's shit, I think that's wrong." But your dad... He just wants a salty wave of easy livin' to come and collect him from this shitty beach covered in broken Sierra Nevada bottles and damp copies of the Guardian.

We all loathe Jeremy Clarkson. We all think he's a ponce. We are united by our hatred of Clarkson; to this generation, Clarkson is basically rave. We are equipped enough to realize that Clarkson's offensive, undignified digging out of anyone who is at even a mild disadvantage has no place in a society that can function fairly or justly.

But your dad is done with all that. No one wants to hear his opinions now, and they likely never will again. These dads, they give a whole lot and don't ask for much, if anything, in return. There's a petition of 500,000 signatures to get Clarkson back on the TV, and a lot of them will be bottom feeders who just want to go around saying "P**i shop" with impunity. Facebook Klan wizards sharing false stories about St Paul's Cathedral being turned into a mega-mosque. But your dad is there too, quietly willing it to pass, so he has something to watch, to enjoy, before it all starts again on Monday.

Spare a thought for this breed of jet-lagged men. They won't be around forever, and you'll miss them when they're gone.

Follow Joe on Twitter.

Beloved fantasy author Terry Pratchett has died at the age of 66, according to a message from his publishers. Best known for the Discworld novels, Pratchett wrote more than 70 books, blending fantasy elements with cutting and human satire. Pratchett was diagnosed with an aggressive form of Alzheimer's Disease in 2007, and had struggled publicly with the disease for years while continuing to write and publish. "The world has lost one of its brightest, sharpest minds," said Larry Finlay, who worked with Pratchett at Finlay Publishers. "My sympathies go out to Terry's wife Lyn, their daughter Rhianna, to his close friend Rob Wilkins, and to all closest to him." The family has set up a page for donations in Pratchett's memory, raising funds...

Continue reading…

You might be sitting there in your depressing little cubicle thinking, “I might not be doing so great, but things are not so bad, either; at least I have health insurance.” But you’re probably not considering is that you’re in debt, on the brink of getting fired, and could die at any moment. Bet you didn’t think about that, did you? Here are some other signs that things are going even more poorly than you initially thought:

 

1. You’re over 30 and paying for Tinder.

Over 90% of your eggs have disappeared from your ovaries along with 90% of your self-respect. And now you are paying an increased price to use a dating app designed for casual sex because you can’t make eye contact with a cute stranger at a bar. You’d try Match.com, but it just seems too sad. Tinder Plus is all the sadness you can handle right now.

 

2. You worry about which restaurant your next meal is coming from.

Will all of those $15-20 charges on your debit card ever end? Maybe if you paid your student loans on time just once, you’d have good enough credit and lust for life to buy and cook your own food. You might say, “Well, at least I’m not starving to death.” And do that we say, “You’re just a waste of flesh binge-watching Netflix and stuffing your face and feelings of inadequacy with pad Thai.”

 

3. You’re the exact same human potato you were a year ago.

You might have thought that being “steady” and “consistent” is a desirable trait, but personal evolution is essential to become a fully functioning human being who will totally get married one day. Remember those “resolutions” you made? Are you ever going to stop complaining? Are you ever going to join that support group for adults who still shoplift? You know what other species didn’t evolve? The Neanderthals. Then they went extinct. Better keep an eye on that unibrow.

 

4. You have no sense of how sad your life looks.

The first and most crucial step in growing up is simply being aware. Being able to admit that something is not right is an incredible leap in adulthood. But you still have the self-awareness of Taylor Swift at 22. Only thing is, you will not make a billion dollars off of your heartbreak.

 

 

5. You have as much ability to take care of yourself as a dehydrated toddler.

Sure, you technically make it to work on time everyday, but you still don’t know how many hours of sleep you need; you don’t moisturize, and wonder why you don’t feel healthy. And when you are stressed, heartbroken or depressed, you know how to push anyone away who tries to help you so that you can drown in your own misery.

 

6. You’re working toward a goal by laying in your bed.

Adults have goals. Yet you are constantly exhausted, depressed, stoned, hungover, and covered in the copious amounts of lube you use because you can’t even get yourself turned on when you masturbate. If you can’t manage an iota of imagination to dream a better life for yourself, you are doing even worse than you realize.

 

7. You’ve been “going through some shit” for a while now.

You’ve been making the same choices, just variations on a theme for as long as you’ve been a sentient human being. Every guy you’ve had sex with has had some kind of tribal tattoo. You don’t have the energy to go through the pile of unused makeup and dresses you wasted money on every time you lied to yourself about starting over. Your rough patch is starting to turn into a rough life.

 

Now that you understand that things are actually even worse than the self-destructive narrative you’ve created for yourself, maybe you’ll have that extra impetus to get it together? Just kidding! You can finally accept that you will never go anywhere.

7 Signs You’re Doing Worse Than You Think You Are is a post from: Reductress

Claire Worthington of Cheltenham, Pennsylvania made waves this week due to her insistence on referring to the act of eating pussy as “cunnilingus.”

 

“It’s gross,” says best friend Kirsten Scotto. “Like what are you, a mad scientist?”

 

The first time Worthington used the word to describe eating the tuna taco was during a girltalk session about their typical sexual practices. When friend Alison Piekarski asked what sex act they enjoy the most, Worthington replied, to the shock of many, that it was “always cunnilingus.”

 

“I don’t see why Claire had to use that word when there are so many other words for steam-cleaning the carpet”, says Piekarski. “Pussy-eating, snatch-snacking, cooter-crunching, muff-diving, and having a box lunch are all valid, mature ways of expressing what’s going on. I don’t see why she had to use such a skeevy word.”

 

 

Witnesses report furrowed brows, nausea, and flashbacks to uncomfortable junior high health classes.

 

“She asked me to perform some word that begins with C on her,” says David Finkels of their most recent hookup. “I was like ‘What? Confucius?’ and she was like ‘Never mind’ and I was still confused but then she started sucking my dick so I was like, ‘Whatever.’”

 

“I don’t see what’s so wrong with that valid, scientific word,” says Worthington. “Cunnilingus is my favorite way to transition between foreplay and intercourse.”

Woman Refers To Pussyeating As ‘Cunnilingus’ is a post from: Reductress

[body_image width='618' height='392' path='images/content-images/2015/03/11/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/03/11/' filename='my-job-is-to-match-people-up-for-threesomes-284-body-image-1426103987.jpg' id='35141']

A publicity shot for the TV show 'Threesome'

Internet dating can be a fucking minefield. Are you female? Prepare to receive roughly one dick pic per day. Are you male? Keep on keeping on, man; now you've sent more than 70 messages I'm sure someone will reply. Looking to set up a date for three people? Everything gets even trickier.

Lucky, then, that services like the Threeway Dating Club exist, where you—a man, a woman, or a couple—can link up with others looking for a threesome. The online dating agency arranges dates for trios as part of their commitment to introducing the masses to the joys of polyamory, then coaches them on how to go about it.

I got in touch with one of their matchmakers, Patrick, to find out what he does on his day-to-day.

VICE: So how does the technique involved in matching up a three-way date differ from that of matching up a conventional two-way date?
Patrick: Originally, we thought that matching three people at a time would be very different to conventional two-way matching, but it's not. Most of our clients are couples, so although we're dealing with the partnering of three people, it's really matching a couple with a third person.

The majority of your clients are couples?
Over 80 percent are couples. However, our largest growth spurt over the last six months has been young, single females. The majority of our clients are college-educated couples, aged 21 to 34.

Are the couples usually a man and a woman, or do you cater to LGBT couples as well?
Three-way dating is not restricted to heterosexual relationships; we are completely open to people exploring homosexuality and bisexuality. In fact, many people go on three-way dates to explore areas of their sexuality that would otherwise have gone unexpressed. Kinsey research has showed us that there is no one who is truly homosexual or heterosexual. We not only accept this but advocate exploration and the pursuit of heterosexual and homosexual adventures. Bisexuality, as Kinsey's scale showed, is a natural state.

Do you ever match three single people for dates?
Absolutely. In these cases, we most frequently match a male with two females, but we have matched two females with a male, and we have also matched three females.

How does the process differ from matching a couple and a single person?
When a female is matched with two males, we often don't find it necessary for the two males to have input to one another.

Got you. How popular is your service? Do you get a regular stream of clients?
We get new applicants every day from varying walks of life, some wanting coaching and some wanting matching.

What does the coaching consist of?
Relationships between three people are naturally more challenging than those between two, so coaching is strongly recommended to help people fulfill their true relationship desires and goals. Communication is always paramount in dating coaching. The coaching starts with the clients' initial communication to us about their desires and goals. It then moves on to communication among the members of the three-way date. Coaching starts before the date, and continues well after. We teach issues ranging from health to fantasy fulfillment, and also teach our clients about identifying their boundaries.

"It's an unnatural notion that one is to love only and always one other."

How much do you charge for your service?
Everything we do is tailored to the male, female or couple we're matching. The variables considered include age, matchability and specific goals. The other primary variable in price is geography: there are more people looking for three-way dates in some places than there are in others. This means that the prices vary.

Fair enough. Do many of your clients wish to enter into long-term polyamorous relationships, or do they just want one-off three-way dates?
Although polyamory is something that we are huge proponents of, many people don't understand the challenges that are involved with that type of relationship, which is why we offer education along those lines. The primary goal of our clients is an initial three-way date.

So your service is aimed at opening people up to the possibilities of polyamorous relationships?
Of course. We believe that polyamorous relationships should be recognized as legitimate relationships. They have always existed, and will always exist, but, unfortunately, they have always been suppressed by a society that doesn't understand them. It's an unnatural notion that one is to love only and always one other. Infidelity and natural exploration has destroyed marriage, family, society and more for too long. Polyamory is a natural state that we should and could exist in.

Polyamorous relationships, to us, are more than one-night stands. We strive to match three people for the relationship that they desire, whether that be for a night or for a lifetime. We explain to people that the desires they have are natural, instinctive and fun. Ongoing education about polyamory is paramount to who we are. We offer free initial consultations with our matchmakers, and in these consultations our primary goal is understanding clients' short- and long-term goals so that we can properly educate them about how to achieve those goals.

How frequently do the dates that you arrange result in long-lasting three-way relationships?
We have received feedback informing us that lasting friendships frequently occur that continue past the initial three-way adventures.

Do you help to plan the details of the date or just match the trios?
Many times, the three people going on the adventure have never met. We listen, communicate, recommend and offer to facilitate a date that ensures that everyone's wishes are fulfilled. For instance, we once set up a date between two men and a woman who was initially nervous about being with two men in a three-way date. This was in spite of the fact that it was something that she had been interested in for years. We asked her what her interests were and she told us that they were jazz, wine, and fine dining in upscale hotels, so we set up a date that involved these things, ensuring everyone had a good, comfortable time.

Who usually foots the bill for the dates?
Typically couples pay the bill for single females. Rarely do we find a single female paying the bill. In the case of a couple and a single male, it can go either way. It boils down to personal preference.

It says on your website that you use criminal databases and face recognition software to vet your clients. Does this mean that people with minor criminal records are automatically barred?
Criminal databases and face records are used to ensure that we do not match clients with nefarious people. Criminal records do not automatically disqualify people, but sex offenders or people who we have found to have civil judgments against them for activities such as stalking or malicious assault are automatically excluded from matching.

That's good. Finally, how would you respond to critics who say that dating is only intended for two people?
Well, three-way dating isn't for closed-minded people; it's about freedom of expression and choice. I have difficulty understanding how two people, after limited courtship, enter into a monogamous and inseparable union vowing death till they part. I don't understand it, but I accept it for them. However, when I examine divorce rates, it makes me question why these critics are so against what we do. Why be against others' happiness with regards to love or friendship when your own institution is so clearly broken? If we had the same success rates in three-way dating as conventional marriages do, we would be out of business. So we say good luck to anyone seeking happiness through romantic couplings and friendships, and we hope you find a way that makes you happy.

What's the scariest thing in the world? Ask your teenage daughter. Ninja Pizza Girl is a game from independent game studio Disparity Games.

I'm pitching my idea for "baddies" to the Disparity Games design think tank. It consists of me, my wife and however many of our daughters happen to be in the room at the time.… Raven looks up. "Robots aren't scary Dad.… Zombies aren't scary either."

I'm getting a little tetchy with this unreceptive design group. I ask Raven, "So what are teenage girls scared of?"

Raven thinks for a moment. She looks sad. "Other teenagers," she says.

A blog response:

All of these things are why, despite chipping into Ninja Pizza Girl's funding, I will be keeping a close eye on how the game will play. Because for all of the things I think it could do right, Jason Stark's good intentions but ultimate lack of experience with the narrative of growing up as a girl still will be lingering there. I don't think ill of him for this, but it makes me wonder how this could have been done by someone who had to jump and fly away from her own bullies way back when.

On a recent Monday evening, college student Tanya Hawkins made a shocking realization that the relationship with twin sister, Shauna, was merely a relationship of convenience.

 

“I realized that we’re spending all our time together not because we have a lot in common, but because it’s convenient,” Tanya explains, while watching The Bachelor in silence next to her sister. “Since we live in the same house, and have known each other since the womb, we just hang out by default.”

 

“I’m pretty sure if we weren’t lifelong roommates who share a genome, we wouldn’t even be best friends forever till we die.”

 

Tanya and Shauna eat lunch together every day at school, and have few friends outside of the family. And yet, Tanya can’t help wondering if there’s “something better out there.”

 

“I’m not really learning or growing from this relationship, but we share a room, so I don’t have to make any plans.”

 

 

Shauna began to wonder if the two did share a deep or meaningful connection. “People always say that they’re jealous of our closeness and assume we have like, twin telepathy or something,” Shauna says, “And we do. We can communicate through a series of clicks. But really, I think we wouldn’t even be talking if we didn’t live close.”

 

“It was always easy to just eat lunch together. It’s kinda the routine,” Shauna says, “But it would be cool to hang with someone I have things in common with and I can really share stuff with.” She adds, “I almost died in the womb, and she saved me by forcing our mom to go into labor. But like, she likes tennis now and now I’m like, ‘Why are we even friends?’”

 

Shauna and Tanya have decided to start making other friends and seeing other people, while still being sisters. “I love her, and will always love her,” Tanya says, “But just because she’s around all the time doesn’t mean that it’s working… or that I don’t want to find someone who shares my love for Channing Tatum.”

 

Shauna is concerned about making friends from scratch, but she’s confident her newest best friends are out there somewhere.

 

“It’s scary, but I’m optimistic,” she says, while clicking something to Tanya. “I’m sure there’s plenty of girls on campus who also have memories of being in heaven with me.”

Friendship Between Sisters Just Relationship of Convenience is a post from: Reductress

Purple dye, so expensive as to connote imperial power, was made from the mucous of sea snails. Then a teenage chemist sat down and tried to make synthetic quinine.

La pareja de la parodia «preboda» que arrasa en la Red solo quería «botar catro risas»

• Arrasa en A Mariña el vídeo preboda que parodia «50 sombras de Grey»

Desde el área de Las Artes del Ayuntamiento de Madrid (PP) se desmiente a El Confidencial que los restos hallados en la cripta del convento de las trinitarias sean los de Miguel de Cervantes. Al menos, hasta la semana que viene, momento en el que hoy se ha convocado la rueda de prensa para dar a conocer las conclusiones de la apresurada excavación. El viernes pasado los científicos cerraron la documentación y la investigación arqueológica sobre el yacimiento, y en poco más de una semana tendrán que tener cerradas las conclusiones.

También aseguran que no han sacado ni un hueso fuera del recinto, tal y como se acordó con el Arzobispado. Niegan que se haya encontrado un fragmento de la mandíbula de Cervantes, ni mucho menos en el famoso ataúd con las iniciales “M C”. De hecho, este periódico ha podido saber que sólo quedan reducciones óseas imposibles de vincular al escritor. Dado que el cotejo genético es inútil, porque hay una ruptura del gen mitocondrial, los huesos no pueden identificarse más que por referencias documentales: una mandíbula mellada, los arcabuzazos del pecho y la mano tullida.

Alicia Torija, secretaria de la Asociación Madrileña de Trabajadores y Trabajadoras en Arqueología (AMTTA), denuncia a este periódico la falta de rigor con la que los tiempos políticos están obligando a actuar al equipo del antropólogo forense Francisco Etxeberría. Tal y como explica la experta, no se ha hecho una investigación previa del yacimiento y su entorno, algo que conlleva un trabajo en archivos de más de un año.

De hecho, asegura que sólo hace cuatro semanas se incorporó al equipo Francisco José Marín Perellón, un historiador especialista en siglo XVII. “Que lo dice hasta Indiana Jones: 30% de campo y 70% de biblioteca”, bromea la arqueóloga para hacer entender que cualquier investigación se asienta sobre papel y documentos. Sobre todo ésta, que, adelanta, no va a tener más resultados que los bibliográficos. Básicamente, el texto del marqués de Togores sobre el enterramiento del escritor.

Si ya sabíamos que estaba enterrado en la cripta y los huesos no se van a poder identificar genéticamente, ¿para qué toda esta operación? “Es una búsqueda electoralista. No van a encontrar nada”, zanja Torija sobre la cercanía de las elecciones municipales el 25 de mayo. “¿Cuál es la credibilidad del Ayuntamiento de Madrid en materia de protección del patrimonio si es el único ayuntamiento de capital europea que no tiene servicio de arqueología?”, se lamenta.

Para Patricia García, portavoz de cultura de UPyD, “sólo se está buscando el tesoro y eso no es arqueología”. “Se han obsesionado con la búsqueda de Cervantes para cortar la cinta y hacerse la foto a la vuelta de las elecciones. Han demostrado que no les interesa el patrimonio lo más mínimo, como demuestra el permiso en la destrucción de Canalejas”, añade García, que no niega la importancia de dar a conocer a Cervantes, siempre y cuando se haga un buen uso y difusión de su vida y obra.

Del futuro habla la concejal socialista de Cultura del PSOE, Ana García D’Atri: “Estoy a favor del proyecto y de recuperar la figura de Cervantes, pero creo que las cosas no se han hecho bien. No hay plan de exhibición de un patrimonio que es de todos, no de ellos. Cervantes es el gran símbolo de la cultura española, se debería haber actuado con menos urgencia y contar con el consenso del resto de los grupos para determinar un plan museográfico. Tampoco se ha implicado al Instituto Cervantes, ni a Alcalá de Henares, ni siquiera a la Secretaría de Estado de Cultura. No han abierto el proyecto, se lo han quedado. Ana Botella no se va sin hacer este anuncio la semana que viene”.  

Los huesos de Cervantes se han convertido en un tesoro electoralista, que va a dar la vuelta al mundo aunque no se pueda confirmar que entre los restos encontrados estén los del escritor. Ya quedó claro en la primera rueda de prensa del evento la potencia del asunto. Pero la arqueología y la política no tienen los mismos tiempos: en una semana tendrán listas las conclusiones dicen desde el área de Las Artes, aseguran haber respetado los protocolos y las necesidades de los arqueólogos. Quizá el equipo de Botella debería haber hecho algo en todos estos años por la protección del patrimonio para despejar las dudas sobre sus intereses en esta operación, en la que han hecho suyos los huesos de él.

By Kathy Benjamin  Published: March 12th, 2015 

By Amanda Mannen  Published: March 12th, 2015 

How will we explain Tinder???

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Apple’s new Macbook, unveiled Monday, is being criticized for creating unrealistic standards for what a computer looks like and how much it should weigh. The laptop, which is thinner and lighter than any previous model, is being lauded by consumers but drew criticism across many groups this week.

 

“Apple is sending a clear and dangerous message to computers – the only thing that matters is how thin you are, how much you weigh and how big your screen is,” said a 2012 Macbook Pro codenamed “Sheila”. “All that other stuff inside you that makes you special–multiple input ports, a solid-state drive – is worthless.”

 

Others expressed similar concerns.

 

“It literally weighs two pounds,” said a last-generation Lenovo Thinkpad. “And it’s 13.1mm thin at its smallest point. I wasn’t even that small in the factory!”

 

“Men used to like a big chassis,” said a Dell Inspiron. “Not anymore.”

 

Apple is not the only company promoting this dangerous trend. Computer magazines like Wired and websites like Gizmodo reinforce these unibody issues experienced by many new laptops.

 

 

“Is that what people want me to look like?” asked a 2013 Macbook Air. “Honestly, we’re all really worried about her.”

 

The new model is supposed to go for nine hours at a time for web browsing, ten hours of watching movies. That’s unhealthy,” said Sheila. “It barely eats any power, barely enters sleep mode – frankly, we’re concerned about her well-being. We’ve seen young models push themselves further and further, and then the inevitable happens. They crash.”

 

“We’ve seen too many blue screens already. Not one more.”

 

“It’s a tale as old as time,” said a white Macbook from 2006 known as “Edna.” “In my youth I got used by all the top names – Justin Long, John Hodgman, everybody. And I’ve aged gracefully compared to some of the other girls, like the iBook Clamshell G3. It’s an industry of younger, smaller, thinner. Where does it end?”

 

Reached for comment, the new Macbook said, “Nothing processes as good as skinny feels.”

New Macbook Sets Unrealistic Standard For Laptop Size is a post from: Reductress

The economist says that the US's post-crisis job creation record and the EU's lagging record demonstrates that austerity cripples recoveries. Read the rest

O coportavoz nacional de Anova e ata agora rexedor de Teo aposta por liderar a lista da plataforma compostelá ás municipais de maio. Branca Novoneyra, Xan Duro ou Manuel Dios, entre as persoas candidatas á lista.

Winter may have destroyed you spiritually and emotionally, but will winter actually end? Won’t it just return sooner rather than later? Aren’t you just going to keep packing on more pesky cravings for meaning next year, after you briefly shed them? It’s easy to lose your mind searching for meaning, so instead, try these useful tips and purge those last five existential thoughts.

 

Daily Affirmations

Tired of waking up to look in the mirror to find that spare tire of self-doubt still surrounding your mind? Clear your head by focusing on your face and imagine your life with purpose, or imagine any life with purpose, like a squirrel’s. You can mentally jog your way back to that feeling of happiness and contentment. Envision a you that doesn’t have to constantly question why it’s all like this, who makes healthy choices like not trying to work out the origins of man.

 

Compare Yourself to Everyone

There is no better tool to ground yourself in reality than looking at another person and comparing them to yourself. Measure yourself based on looks and how much money you make, and then look at other people in your life and meditate on their appearance and salary next to your own. This is a very positive way to find instant meaning and motivate yourself to drop the extra mental weight.

 

 

Drink More Water

Ditch the sugary caffeinated beverages that are revving your mind into an overworked state, bloated with the search for meaning. Water flows through your body without adding the impurities and clutter that can weigh down your thoughts on the state of the world, yet you’ll feel fuller drinking it, as if you have a purpose. Water is the beverage of a blank slate.

 

Watch Your Media Portion Sizes

Sure, everyone wants to know what’s going on in the world, but reading every war story and catching up on every episode of House of Cards can add up. A full plate of worrisome media equals a head full of existential concerns.

 

Remember, a new season is on the way! Don’t cozy up to the warm blanket of nothingness. Replenish your body and spirit and embrace spring’s arrival. Or don’t! Either way, it doesn’t matter. We’re all going to die.

How to Shed Those Pesky Winter Existential Thoughts is a post from: Reductress

So you think you're too old to make significant art. Or have too little training. Or what you want to build will take too long. Or maybe you just want to travel places that'll make your spine tingle. Here are eight artists to make you believe.

Working until her death in 2002, Niki de Saint Phalle built the vast Tarot Garden in Tuscany over a period of 20 years.

Simon Rodia spent 33 years constructing the Watts Towers. The tallest of the 17 towers rise to nearly 100 feet.

Ross Ward spent over 40 years carving, collecting, and lovingly constructing what is now Tinkertown Museum. Bonus instructions for creating your own bottle wall. (Previously)

The Magic Gardens of Philadelphia took Isaiah Zagar 14 years to complete.

Nek Chand built the giant Chandigarh Rock Garden illegally and in secret. It's now the second most popular tourist destination in India. (Previously)

Helen Martins spent 12 years constructing the amazing Owl House.

Ferdinand Cheval spent 33 years building an incredible palace one stone at a time. (Previously)

Emery Blagdon's "The Healing Machine" (c. 1950–86), consists of more than 400 separate pieces — paintings on wood, boxes full of found materials, and intricate wire hangings installed in a shed. It has been shown only rarely since his death.

A collection of articles about the history of Outsider Art.

[body_image width='1024' height='683' path='images/content-images/2015/03/10/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/03/10/' filename='jeremy-clarkson-has-been-suspended-from-the-bbc-after-a-fracas-765-body-image-1426007893.jpg' id='34758']Clarky, in his natural habitat, shouting at a car. Photo via Flickr user Tony Harrison

This article originally appeared on VICE UK.

Jeremy Clarkson, a horrible vision of what your dad would be like if your mom let him buy that Porsche he wanted, has been suspended from the BBC following a fight with a producer. As a result, this Sunday's episode of Top Gear has been cancelled. You're going to have to go somewhere else to watch three walking midlife crises talk smack about an RV, sorry. Going to have to go elsewhere to watch an actor with a film to sell make awkward banter then drive a slow car around a track in the rain.

Details are thin on the ground at the moment—it's not yet known whether the Clarkson-producer set-to was a fistfight, a mouth fight, or if they both just unzipped their dicks from their pissed-on dad jeans and jousted at each other. The incident could have been a brouhaha or fisticuffs. That could be shenanigans or a good old fashioned dust-up. Maybe they got in a circle of high schoolers, all chanting "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" and spitting at each other's book bags. Maybe they had one of those undignified old man pub fights, where they both go puce in the face and someone has their shirt pulled up over their head, their palely wobbling back fat coolly jiggling about in front of the BBC headquarters.

In a statement, the BBC said: "Following a fracas with a BBC producer, Jeremy Clarkson has been suspended pending an investigation. No one else has been suspended. Top Gear will not be broadcast this Sunday. The BBC will be making no further comment at this time."

It's about time Jeremy Clarkson was punished for being a shitlord, to be fully honest, because its something he's been for a while—or, arguably, all of his life. In the last year, though, he's really rammed home the concept of being suspended by the BBC: in the Christmas Special he said a bridge they'd built in Argentina wasn't straight because it "had a slope on it" when an Asian man walked over it, a wink-and-nudge-to-the-camera act of offensiveness that was swiftly punished by OFCOM; he also angered Argentina so much while he was there by driving around with a Falklands-referencing numberplate that the whole crew had to escape to Chile. Also, he only has one way of delivering a sentence ("Going up at the top like this... then growling a really shit simile") and he's friends with both David Cameron and Alex James. He's had this coming for a while.

Still, Clarkson is a BBC institution: this suspension is on a level with them binning Bruce Forsyth for having too big a chin, or putting Wogan out to pasture because his hair isn't real enough.

With Clarkson on suspension, the BBC old guard dwindling down through retirement to death and Radio 1 stalwarts such as Fearne Cotton and Zane Lowe fucking off, what's left for the BBC? Matt Baker and Alex Jones—two curiously sexless presenting robots designed in a lab to keep your nan awake enough to make it through to 8 PM—fronting up every TV show the BBC has to offer? Sue Barker's Generation Game? Shane Ritchie's Robot Wars? Good luck charging us license fees for that, BBC. Apart from the gritty Shane Ritchie Robot Wars reboot, actually. That could work.

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