Beast

Harvard stem cell researchers announced today that they have made a giant leap forward in the quest to find a truly effective treatment for type 1 diabetes, a disease that affects an estimated 3 million Americans at a cost of about $15 billion annually.

With human embryonic stem cells as a starting point, the scientists were for the first time able to produce, in the kind of massive quantities needed for cell transplantation and pharmaceutical purposes, human insulin-producing beta cells equivalent in most every way to normally functioning beta cells.

Doug Melton, who led the work, said he hopes to have human transplantation trials using the cells under way within a few years. Twenty-three years ago, when his infant son Sam was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes, Melton dedicated his career to finding a cure for the disease.

“We are now just one preclinical step away from the finish line,” said Melton, whose daughter Emma also has type 1 diabetes.

A report on the new work is being published today by the journal Cell.

Felicia W. Pagliuca, Jeff Millman, and Mads Gurtler of Melton’s lab are co-first authors on the Cell paper. The research group and paper authors include a Harvard undergraduate.

“You never know for sure that something like this is going to work until you’ve tested it numerous ways,” said Melton, Harvard’s Xander University Professor and a Howard Hughes Medical Institute investigator. “We’ve given these cells three separate challenges with glucose in mice, and they’ve responded appropriately; that was really exciting.

“It was gratifying to know that we could do something that we always thought was possible,” he continued, “but many people felt it wouldn’t work. If we had shown this was not possible, then I would have had to give up on this whole approach. Now I’m really energized.”

The stem cell-derived beta cells are undergoing trials in animal models, including non-human primates, Melton said.

“Doug Melton and his colleagues continue to push stem cell science forward with their extraordinary work. This accomplishment is something none of us could have predicted 10 years ago, and I am excited to see where it will lead.” — President Drew Faust

Elaine Fuchs, the Rebecca C. Lancefield Professor at Rockefeller University, and a Howard Hughes Medical Institute investigator who is not involved in the work, hailed it as “one of the most important advances to date in the stem cell field, and I join the many people throughout the world in applauding my colleague for this remarkable achievement.

“For decades, researchers have tried to generate human pancreatic beta cells that could be cultured and passaged long-term under conditions where they produce insulin. Melton and his colleagues have now overcome this hurdle and opened the door for drug discovery and transplantation therapy in diabetes,” Fuchs said.

Jose Oberholzer, associate professor of surgery, endocrinology, and diabetes, as well as bioengineering, at the University of Illinois at Chicago and director of the islet and pancreas transplant program and the chief of the Division of Transplantation, said the work “will leave a dent in the history of diabetes. Doug Melton has put in a lifetime of hard work in finding a way of generating human islet cells in vitro. He made it. This is a phenomenal accomplishment.”

Melton, who also is co-scientific director of the Harvard Stem Cell Institute and the University’s Department of Stem Cell and Regenerative Biology — both of which were created more than a decade after he began his quest — said that when he told his son and daughter, they were surprisingly calm. “I think like all kids, they always assumed that if I said I’d do this, I’d do it,” he said with a self-deprecating grin.

Type 1 diabetes is an autoimmune metabolic condition in which the body kills off all the pancreatic beta cells that produce the insulin needed for glucose regulation in the body. Thus the final preclinical step in the development of a treatment involves protecting from immune system attack the approximately 150 million cells that would have to be transplanted into each patient being treated. Melton is collaborating to develop an implantation device to protect the cells with Daniel G. Anderson, the Samuel A. Goldblith Professor of Applied Biology, associate professor in the department of chemical engineering, the Institute of Medical Engineering and Science, and the Koch Institute at MIT.

Melton said that the device Anderson and his colleagues at Massachusetts Institute of Technology are testing has thus far protected beta cells implanted in mice from immune attack for many months. “They are still producing insulin,” Melton said.

Cell transplantation as a treatment for diabetes is still essentially experimental, uses cells from cadavers, requires the use of powerful immunosuppressive drugs, and has been available to only a very small number of patients.

Anderson said the new work by Melton’s lab is “an incredibly important advance for diabetes. There is no question that ability to generate glucose-responsive, human beta cells through controlled differentiation of stem cells will accelerate the development of new therapeutics. In particular, this advance opens the doors to an essentially limitless supply of tissue for diabetic patients awaiting cell therapy.”

Richard A. Insel, chief scientific officer at JDRF (Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation), which helps fund Melton’s work, said “JDRF is thrilled with this advancement toward large-scale production of mature, functional human beta cells by Dr. Melton and his team. This significant accomplishment has the potential to serve as a cell source for islet replacement in people with type 1 diabetes and may provide a resource for discovery of beta cell therapies that promote survival or regeneration of beta cells and development of screening biomarkers to monitor beta cell health and survival to guide therapeutic strategies for all stages of the disease.”

Eliot Brenner, program director of the Helmsley Charitable Trust’s type 1 diabetes program, said, “The trust is pleased to have supported Dr. Melton and his team in this breakthrough. The ability to create insulin-producing cells not only has significant clinical potential, but it opens an important new path for researchers to understand and develop novel treatments for type 1 diabetes.”

Melton expressed gratitude to both JDRF and the Helmsley Charitable Trust, saying, “Their support has been, and continues to be, essential. I also need to thank [research supporters] Howard and Stella Heffron, whose faith in our vision got this work under way, and helped to get us where we are today.”

While diabetics can keep their glucose metabolism largely under control by injecting insulin multiple times a day, that does not provide the kind of exquisite fine-tuning necessary to properly control metabolism, and that lack of control can lead to devastating complications from blindness to loss of limbs.

About 10 percent of the more than 26 million Americans living with type 2 diabetes are dependent on insulin injections, and presumably would be candidates for beta cell transplants, Melton said.

“There have been previous reports of other labs deriving beta cell types from stem cells. No other group has produced mature beta cells as suitable for use in patients,” he said. “The biggest hurdle has been to get to glucose sensing, insulin-secreting beta cells, and that’s what our group has done.”

Harvard President Drew Faust noted, “When the Harvard Stem Cell Institute was created in 2004, the University ventured into uncharted and, some thought, untenable terrain. Today, the possibility of growing in knowledge and in wisdom has given way to the promise of improving health and changing lives. Doug Melton and his colleagues continue to push stem cell science forward with their extraordinary work. This accomplishment is something none of us could have predicted 10 years ago, and I am excited to see where it all leads.”

In addition to the institutions and individual cited above, the work was funded by the Harvard Stem Cell Institute, the National Institutes of Health, and the JPB Foundation.

 

If you’re a kid of the ’80s and ’90s like I and pretty much all of the writers here at Nerdist are, then there is one thing we can all agree on with regards to our childhoods: they were scary as sh*t! Everything was made to terrify us back then. Kids now have it easy (says the 30 year old man sounding like a 90 year old) with nothing meant to scare or disturb them at all, but when we were all youngins, the movies marketed to kids were full of frightening imagery and themes and, frankly, I’m surprised any of us can go outside at all as a result. But, because nostalgia, we still love them; it’s just boggling how many of these films were made. Below is an UNRANKED, CHRONOLOGICAL LIST of movies that were made for kids that make some horror movies look tame. (Your mileage may vary.)

Raggedy Ann & Andy: A Musical Adventure (1977)
I wasn’t alive for this movie’s initial release, but I certainly remember watching it at my grandparents’ house (my grandma taped it off of PBS at some point). Outwardly, it seems like a normal, kind of pre-Toy Story adventure cartoon, with the famous dolls Raggedy Ann and Raggedy Andy having to find their way back to their owner-kid’s house after leaving to rescue a French doll named Babette from a pirate. They of course also encounter various other creatures and beings along the way. But it’s these creatures and the squiggly, distorted, Ralph Steadmany animation style that caused me a lot of grimaces over the years. I didn’t stop watching it, though. The below clip features the part where they fall into a vat of gooey candy stuff only to find out it’s a living glob person who eats himself. So, acid, huh?

The Watcher in the Woods (1980)
There was a time at Disney, the pre-Katzenberg days, when there was an active goal to make scary movies for kids. As a result, some really interesting, really weird, and very dark films came about, including the animated The Black Cauldron and the live action Dragonslayer. However, it also delved into straight up horror, and the first of them was this film directed by John Hough (Legend of Hell House, Escape to Witch Mountain) and written by Brian Clemens (Captain Kronos: Vampire Hunter). A creepy-ass Bette Davis is the main character, so that’s nightmare fuel already, and this trailer has the same narrator as Jaws and is cut to look like The Omen. DISNEY did this.

The Secret of NIMH (1982)
Little mice as the cute main characters of animated films is not a new concept, but Don Bluth’s first film as director makes everything about their world terrifying. A mother field mouse named Mrs. Brisby has to seek help for her ailing son from a colony of hyper-intelligent and mystical rats, where she learns the titular secret about the tests performed on them. It’s kind of like an alien-abduction story but about mice, where human scientists are the aliens doing experiments and so on and so forth. There’s lots of great scary stuff in this one, but perhaps my favorite scene is when Mrs. Brisby goes to find the Great Owl who loves in a cave full of moths and giant spiders and things. And they even got horror legend John Carradine to do the voice! Bluth and company knew what the hell they were doing.

The Dark Crystal (1982)
Disney and Bluth weren’t the only traditionally-child-friendly sorts to go super duper dark. Jim Henson had long wanted to make his puppets more grown up, despite the family-friendly tradition of puppetry. I mean, The Muppet Show was about as zany as it gets. But for his first of only two forays into creepy fantasy, Henson made an entirely puppet world and wrote a very dense and world-building plot about creatures called Gelflings who had to save their world by finding a missing piece of a powerful crystal. It’s a little Tolkien-ish, but I didn’t know that as a kid. I also didn’t know what the storyline meant because I was too busy being petrified by the vulture people known as the Skeksis. They kept little blind creatures as slaves and sat in bourgeois luxury whilst bad stuff happened around them and because of them. Honestly, I still don’t know what this movie’s about; someone please tell me. [Editor's Note: Duality, perhaps?]

Something Wicked This Way Comes (1983)
Another from Disney, and practically the end of them trying to be edgy and scary. Ray Bradbury adapted his own novel and didn’t really shy away from any of the truly disturbing moments. It follows a pair of kids in their turn-of-the-century town who see bad things happening because of a strange traveling carnival headed up by the mysterious Mr. Dark (Jonathan Pryce). He grants people their deepest wishes, but always for a price, like the best Twilight Zone episodes. The thing is, though, this wasn’t a Twilight Zone episode, it was a Disney movie for families, and the movie included bleeding and despair and a guy who, let’s face it, is probably the Devil himself. It also has scary calliope music and Jason Robards trying to be helpful, and it’s just traumatizing for a little kid. I bet I’d like it now, though. Interesting fact: all of these darker Disney movies have been all but disowned by the studio in recent years despite the fact that they’d probably clean up if Blu-ray releases were ever made available. My two cents; what do I know?

The NeverEnding Story (1984)
Okay, now I’m pretty sure we’ve all seen this one, right? I’m going to say 90% of it should never have been shown to impressionable young kids. It’s crazy how dark and how effectively scary so many of the situations and creatures are. Following the adventures of Atreyu, the hero of a story being read by Bastian (who becomes part of the story by reading it), the movie tracks the appearance of a terrible entity called “The Nothing” which literally negates existence. Very heady, plus it made kids fear the absence of anything, which is an existential horror show for parents. From Artax the horse drowning in the Swamps of Sadness to the Rockbiter lamenting not being able to save all his little friends from being sucked into the void, this movie was enough to make any kid question their own mortality. But easily the most frightening (and still frightening) part is the massive wolf creature G’mork who follows Atreyu throughout the film and eventually fights him to the death. Holy… just holy…

Gremlins (1984)
I don’t think this one was really for kids, but that didn’t stop parents everywhere from taking their children and/or renting it for their children because of the cute and furry little face of Gizmo used to sell the movie. Director Joe Dante didn’t trick anyone; that’s just how the movie was marketed, and surely with Steven Spielberg’s name attached as producer, families would have been like “Oh, this’ll be just like E.T.,” forgetting just how traumatizing THAT movie was. Gremlins was one of the movies that contributed to the need for the MPAA to instigate the PG-13, and I can’t really say I blame them. This is much more violent that anything branded a simple PG should be. The scene most people point to is the brightly-lit kitchen scene in which Billy Peltzer’s mom has to dispatch of three cackling green guys. It’s something else, all right.

Return to Oz (1985)
I lied earlier; this is another scary-ass Disney movie. You all remember how great and joyful you feel after watching The Wizard of Oz, right? You may have been scared of the flying monkeys or the trees with faces, but ultimately, the movie was bright and chipper and made you remember the power of being home. Well SHUT UP with that happy garbage! The world’s a terrible, unfair place and not even Dorothy Gale is safe. This very oddly-judged sequel, made some 45 years later, begins with Dorothy (now played by the decidedly Wednesday Addams-looking Fairuza Balk, who does do a good job of sounding like Judy Garland) in a mental hospital receiving shock treatment for her delusions about the Land of Oz. She is somehow freed and taken back to Oz in order to save it from destruction at the hands of a Nome King and an evil witch (of course). There are things in this movie called “Wheelers” which were taken, I think, directly from the nightmares of kids, and there’s a whole scene devoted to the witch woman’s hallway full of heads. Even the helpful people are scary – Jack Pumpkinhead?!?!? I mean, honestly. No wonder they played this way late at night on the old premium-cable Disney Channel.

Little Nemo: Adventures in Slumberland (1989)
This animated movie had a very long and complicated history, with the project crossing the paths of many famous filmmaking and animation types including George Lucas, Hayao Miyazaki, Ray Bradbury, Chuck Jones, and Brad Bird before finally being credited to Masami Hata and William Hurtz, the first Japanese/American animated collaboration. The story follows a kid whose dreams are so powerful they begin to invade reality, which is fine when his dreams involve flying around on his bed and looking at cool things, but are less so when he has nightmares. The scene that gave a lot of kids (including our managing editor Rachel Heine) nightmares of their own depicted a river of living black grossness that breaks into the palace and eventually engulfs and abducts the goodly, Santa-looking King Morpheus, who it’s safe to say does not know Kung fu in this version. The clip of it on YouTube is even titled “The Nightmare Scene.” [Editor's note: Scariest. movie. ever.]

The Witches (1990)
Roald Dahl’s books always walked the line between fanciful and disturbing, and that was part of the fun of it. The 1971 film of Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory did a pretty good job of balancing the two halves. But, if a director who has a penchant for heady terror is put in charge, it’s very easy to go from fun and a little scary to mostly scary and hardly any fun. This happened with the adaptation of The Witches, which I can’t imagine any 6 year old (which I was at the time) not recoiling is revulsion. The director of this fair piece of filmmaking is Nicolas Roeg, whose previous works included Don’t Look Now, The Man Who Fell to Earth, and Bad Timing: A Sensual Obsession. Yeah, let’s give him a movie for kids! Anjelica Huston portrayed the lead witch, and the scene in which our main character sneaks into a witch convention is not something you’ll soon forget, thanks in no small part to the Jim Henson creature shop.

These are just ten that affected me. Mr. Boogedy, Labyrinth, and even Pee-wee’s Big Adventure could have made the list (even though that one wasn’t REALLY for kids). What movies scared the crud out of you growing up? Let’s all have a group therapy sesh down in the comments.

This is a video of some guy constantly scaring/harassing his girlfriend with different Lord of the Rings quotes. Amazingly, somehow she didn't leave him before he was able to make this video. Also, for a guy who can remember every line from Lord of the Rings, it's a little surprising HE CAN NEVER REMEMBER TO NOT SHOOT IN PORTRAIT MODE. If I were here I'd leave him in a heartbeat for a guy who quotes The Princess Bride, even if he doesn't get all the words right. *sneaking up behind girlfriend* As yooou waaaaaaant. Keep going for the video and be thankful you're in the relationship you're in.

Following a brief tease at E3 2014, Sony has officially announced that Vib-Ribbon will be coming to the PlayStation Network this week. The cult rhythm title will be available in North America, Canada, Latin America and Japan this week, with a release in Europe set for next week.

Originally released in 1999, Vib-Ribbon is a quirky rhythm based game that is perhaps best remembered more for its unique graphics than anything else. The title, which has previously only been available in Japan and Europe, allows users to create customized levels to play through by inserting their own music CDs.

SCEA president and CEO Shawn Layden spoke further on the reaction to the Vib-Ribbon tease at E3.

It was not my intention to rub salt in the Vib Ribbon wound, but to express my admiration for it as the genre-busting title it is and was. My mistake was that I had assumed that everyone who had been around in the original PlayStation era would have had their chance to play the game. I had forgotten that the American gamer was effectively denied the opportunity. To mention it at E3 was to delight some and to squirt lemon in the eyes of others. For this, I apologize. It was not my intent to dangle the delight of Vibri in front of those who longed for but could not have. It was to make a point about having the courage, and talent, to break the mold. To do what your heart demands. To me Vib Ribbon — well, to be honest, Nanaonsha for that matter — has always been committed to that ideal. An ideal I wish to celebrate.

As someone who read a ton of gaming magazines during the late 1990s and early 2000s, I have been interested in playing Vib-Ribbon ever since I first laid eyes on it. Of course, as a child, I was only interested in it due to how it look, but now I just want to experience the sheer oddness of it.

Vib-Ribbon will be available on the PlayStation 3 and PlayStation Vita once it goes live on the PlayStation Network later today. While nothing has been confirmed yet, Layden also mentioned that they are trying get the title to the PlayStation 4 as well.

Thanks for reading We Got This Covered

constantbullshitting:

oilauren:

"I looked at my hand and my little finger was gone – the bone was sticking out. It’s the weirdest feeling; one second you’re fine and your little finger is there, and the next second it’s gone. It shoves reality up your backside. I was in so much pain and shock that the first thing that hit my head was the beat and the bass. The bass was hard, so I just ripped off my top, wrapped it around my finger and tied it up as tight as I could and skanked it out for half an hour. My mentality was, ‘I’ve only been here for an hour, I’ve paid £10 for this night, I’ve lost my little finger – am I seriously going to go? Nah, I’m going to skank until I can’t skank any more.’ After that, my mate dragged me down to the paramedics."

Friends later told him that a “bunch of stoners found [his] little finger and were playing catch with it.”

now THAT’S what i call a party

“A brief history of the land called Israel / Palestine / Canaan / the Levant.”

Ever since her remarkable 2008 animated feature film Sita Sings The Blues, I’ve been a great admirer of animator, cartoonist, and free-culture activist Nina Paley’s creative and meta-creative work. The recent situation in Gaza makes Paley’s 2012 animated short film This Land Is Mine — “a brief history of the land called Israel / Palestine / Canaan / the Levant” — particularly timely.

Using the visual storytelling tropes of comics and videogames, genres characterized by expressive over-the-topness, Paley captures the subtleties and complexities of the interplay of religion, geopolitics, and the fatal human hunger for power underpinning the region’s long history of conflict.

On her blog, Paley offers a viewer’s guide to who’s killing whom, “because you can’t tell the players without a pogrom.” Her work, like Brain Pickings, is supported through donations, so consider making one on her site.

Brain Pickings has a free weekly newsletter. It comes out on Sundays and offers the week’s best articles. Here’s what to expect. Like? Sign up.

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Why why all creative culture is built on “plagiarism, literary debt, appropriation, incorporation, retelling, rewriting, recapitulation, revision, reprise…”

When Helen Keller was accused of plagiarism, her dear friend Mark Twain wrote her a heartfelt and lively letter of support, in which he asserted that “all ideas are second-hand, consciously and unconsciously drawn from a million outside sources” and that “the kernel, the soul … the actual and valuable material of all human utterances [is] plagiarism.” Despite Twain’s characteristically colorful language, the idea that everything is a remix is far from radical — it was pondered by Henry Miller, used by Johannes Gutenberg, abused by Duke Ellington, and championed by Pete Seeger, among countless other instances revealing that all creative work builds on what came before.

Animator Drew Christie brings Twain’s pioneering advocacy of remix culture to life in this delightful illustrated op-doc for The New York Times, titled Allergy to Originality, exploring why all creative culture is built on “plagiarism, literary debt, appropriation, incorporation, retelling, rewriting, recapitulation, revision, reprise, thematic creation, ironic retake, parody, imitation, stylistic debt, pastiches, collages, and deliberate assemblages.”

Complement with the story of how Mark Twain became the Steve Jobs of his day (the latter being in no small part a creative remixer) and young Twain’s irreverent 1865 advice to little girls.

Brain Pickings has a free weekly newsletter. It comes out on Sundays and offers the week’s best articles. Here’s what to expect. Like? Sign up.

Brain Pickings takes 450+ hours a month to curate and edit across the different platforms, and remains banner-free. If it brings you any joy and inspiration, please consider a modest donation – it lets me know I'm doing something right.

Note: I'm pretty sure the censor bar is NOT covering her closest nipple in the brief clip at 1:10. I mean, not that I notice those sorts of things. This is clip from a 1997 VHS video titled 'How To Have Cybersex On The Internet'. Haha, I owned that one. A real cult classic. Apparently the protip on how to cybersex involves entering a chatroom and telling a stranger, "i'm very horny and im looking for some good cybersex are you interested?" If you're lucky, they'll respond, "yesssssssssss" like the make-believe stud in the video. Then it's just a matter of rubbing yourself/beating your meat against the desk until it's time to smoke a cigarette and take a nap. Bonus points for signing off before your partner finishes. Keep going for the video, maybe you'll learn a thing or two.

Designed by Vincent Meertens

Printed by Puntsherp

Data visualizations tell amazing stories, and this is no exception. This poster translates one year's movement through NYC into a genre of modern art.

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Self-promotion

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Scout Condensed

Last month, 2K Games United Kingdom teased a new project involving the BioShock franchise on Twitter with the picture above. Speculation ran rampant about what the image could possibly mean, especially in light of the recent closure of Irrational Studios. Well, 2K Games officially revealed what the teaser meant today, as the company announced that the award-winning shooter will be coming to the iPhone and iPad later this year.

Coming from the team at 2K China, which was the same team that ported the excellent XCOM: Enemy Unknown to iOS, this version of BioShock is essentially the full version of the title, minus some visual flair. The port will support both touch controls and full controller support, which sounds like a much easier way to play through the campaign. A digital version of the titles artbook will also be included with the port.

2K China production assistant Ben Holschuh explained why the company decided to take on the task of making BioShock work on iOS platforms.

“BioShock was such a huge game back when it released. With more and more people having iPads and iPhones and using that as their core gaming device, there has been a lot more demand lately for some more core experiences. BioShock seemed to make a lot of sense.”

I say this over and over again, but I’m constantly impressed by what developers are able to do with mobile platforms. Whether it be excellent mobile only experiences (Monument Valley) or impressive ports of last-gen titles (the aforementioned XCOM), the mobile platform is only continuing to grow as a gaming platform.

BioShock for iOS is set to be released later this summer, so expect specific release date information to surface soon. The port currently does not have a price set, but expect it to cost around the same as other similar premium iOS titles.

Thanks for reading We Got This Covered

If you have read any of my news articles, you will probably be aware that the consistency of reboots, remakes, and sequels coming out of Hollywood has irked me, as it has irked many of us in recent years. But what I think is most annoying about all of these reboots is how seriously they seem to take themselves. There’s just no fun in the movies any more. Well, if Con Air director Simon West has his way, Con Air 2 could bring some fun back to the movies by launching a bunch of criminals into space.

That’s right: if Con Air 2 ever gets made (and that’s a big IF), Simon West would very much like for it to be Con Air in Space. Here’s what West said in talking with Screen Daily (via Collider):

I would do it if it was completely turned on its head. Con Air in space, for example – a studio version where they’re all robots or the convicts are reanimated as super-convicts, or where the good guys are bad guys and the bad guys are good guys. Something shocking. If it was clever writing it could work.

Wow. Well, yes, I suppose that if it was clever, it could work. But that’s a pretty odd idea, all things considered. Of course, we have had a surfeit of bizarrely plotted action films come to the big screen, so I guess that Con Air in Space is not any weirder than a number of them.

West has admittedly not had a great track record over the years. His last films include The Mechanic and The Expendables 2 – both perfectly serviceable, perfectly ridiculous movies. Con Air itself is not going to win any awards for cohesive plotting or execution, but it worked just fine as a big, dumb action movie with a pretty good cast. Given that Nicolas Cage will take literally anything that comes across his desk right now, he would probably be on board for Con Air in Space if West wanted him.

Of course, this all just a pipe dream right now. There is no script and no apparent interest in a Con Air 2, in space or not. But it’s certainly a different idea, and one which we will keep a close eye on if it should ever come to fruition.

Thanks for reading We Got This Covered

Picture related: looks like she forgot something. A 38-year old Scottish woman recently had a five-inch vibrator (possibly just a dildo, but five inches seems sad for a dildo) removed from her vagina after forgetting it was in there after a drunken night of kinking ten years prior. For reference, that is 9 years, 364 days and 23 hours entirely too long to have a vibrator in your vagina.

The woman came to the Aberdeen Royal Infirmary after she had been experiencing symptoms including fatigue, incontinence and severe weight loss, and after performing an X-Ray, doctors found a five inch sex toy lodged up in her lady parts, protruding into her bladder. It was then that the woman recalled a sexual encounter from ten entire years ago in which she and a partner had been using it and couldn't remember removing it.

Listen, I'll be the first to admit I don't know anything about vaginas (in my mind they're like kangaroo pouches), but I can't help but feel like you should know if there's a five-inch sex toy still inside of you. But who knows, maybe vaginas are more like butts than I imagined (I jammed my wallet up there for safekeeping one night and forgot about it for a week). Thanks to lilco, who agrees if you're going to leave anything in your vagina for a decade, it better give you superpowers.

24 years after Tremors hit theaters, did you actually think you were safe at last from those pesky graboids? Think again – a remake of the beloved horror comedy still has a pulse and is actually ramping up for production sooner than we had thought. Not that we were asking for one, but it might be fun to revisit the premise with more modern special effects, trading out Kevin Bacon and Fred Ward for two modern-day comedians (anyone else want Key and Peele to take this?).

Recently, Don Michael Smith posted the following to his blog, indicating that Universal is keen on the remake:

Hey all you “Company Of Heroes” fans, I’m back in Sofia, Bulgaria getting ready to do another in the series. This one’s called “The Fourth Reich” and it promises to have more of the same only better. For all you out there that hated on the first movie, I’m sorry. But I took all your comments to heart and will try to improve on some of the things you were unhappy with. I am always fighting budgetary issues, but I promise to try and give you what you like and minemalize what you did not. Casting is underway, no news on that front, but I hope to deliver some great actors and maybe even a cool name or two. It’s good to be back and working!!! Keep an eye out for “Jarhead 2: Field Of Fire.” Universal is sending it your way on August 19, 2014, and then comes “Sniper: Legacy” from Sony on September 30. My friend Tom Berenger and Dennis Haysbert showed up for Sniper and made the movie a great experience. Great actors and good people, too. After I finish up “Company Of Heroes: The Fourth Reich” I will be headed to Johannesburg, South Africa to reboot the “Tremors” franchise for Universal. Big year ahead and I’m excited to keep it going with the support of all you genre movie lovers out there. Keep sending me your thoughts. They are always welcome, even the critical ones. I’ll shout out to you all soon. Stay tuned!!!!!

Shooting in Johannesburg will certainly allow the film’s arid locations to feel authentic, but will Tremors still be set in the U.S.? I really hope that Universal and Smith aren’t planning a serious horror remake of Tremors, and that the studio will keep the initial ratios of scares and laughs intact. Seriously though, anyone else for a Key and Peele-led Tremors?

Thanks for reading We Got This Covered

nevver:

Do it yourself doodler

great!

michaelolivo:

PROCESS SHOTS FROM NEVER PRESS FOR OUR UPCOMING BOOK.

Being printed by Never Press for the Golden Source Power Trio:

Jesse Balmer - http://jessebalmer.tumblr.com/

Niv Bavarsky - http://nivbavarsky.tumblr.com/

Michael Olivo - http://michaelolivo.tumblr.com/

UPDATE: Even better video added (it's the second one). This is the massive hole that scientists recently filmed from a helicopter in Siberia. They estimate it's approximately 80-meters (262-feet) across, but aren't sure how deep it extends. I suspect it goes all the way to hell. Are you thinking what I'm thinking? "Rappel down there and kick the devil's ass?!" What? No. I was going to say set up a geothermal power plant. You're weird.

The crater is in an area called Yamal, which translates as "end of the world." According to The Siberian Times, the hole may actually have formed about two years ago, but previous reports and photos were thought to be fake. Now Russian scientists are trekking to the area to check it out and try to determine the cause.

Honestly, I think I'm going to hike to the hole and throw myself in FOR SCIENCE. "How is that for science?" I dunno, maybe if they listen to me hit the bottom they could use physics and math to determine how deep the hole is. "Or they could just lower something." Nah, I like my way better. Plus it would make a great word problem for math students. Keep going for the helicopter footage and a new video from ground-level.

You ever been arrested twice in the same day? It's not as cool as it sounds. I did drink six cartons of cranberry juice cocktail in jail though (two the first time and four the second). I'm kidding, I've just been dealing with some shit the past few days. Famous whistleblower Edward Snowden claims the NSA passes your nudie pics around the office so everyone can have a laugh at your junk.

The Guardian, as part of a far-reaching interview out tomorrow, states that Snowden "...made a startling claim that a culture exists within the NSA in which, during surveillance, nude photographs picked up of people in 'sexually compromising' situations are routinely passed around."

So the NSA is just a bunch of perverts that pass your titty pics around the office. I can't say that I'm surprised. This is the government we're talking about after all. I'm just thankful I always fluff myself up to full-mast before sexting. Because if the NSA is determined to pass my naked pics around the office, you better believe I'm at least going to be rocking a solid boner. Thanks to chichi, who agrees there has got to be better ways to spend our tax dollars.

Foria is a mix of medical cannabis oil and coconut oil for use on vaginas that contains 2mg of THC per spray. It's recommended you spray 12mg (~6 sprays) in and around your vagina, then relax for 30 minutes while it starts to do its thing. It's thing being "feelings of enhanced warmth, increased blood flow, tingling, and relaxation. Also the potential to orgasm easier, have multiple orgasms, or climaxing longer and/or more intense." Sounds promising. Unfortunately I don't have a vagina to try it out on, sooooo..."We've told you a million times, GW -- your butt is not a vagina." No, but it's all I've got. I'll report back with my findings. "Please don't." DAMMIT, I'M DOING SCIENCE AND YOU ARE GOING TO LISTEN. Ooooh, a little tingly so far. Somebody bring me a Sharpie, STAT. Thanks to PYY, who informed me the best spray for vaginas is not WD-40 despite what I swear I read in Popular Mechanics when I was a kid.

This is a short video of a snake experiencing zero gravity. It was one of a series of experiments conducted to determine the behavioral responses of amphibians and reptiles to low gravity during parabolic flights. That poor bastard. I mean, MAYBE he's having a good time, but I doubt it. He looks like a floating dog turd. Nothing wants to look like a floating dog turd, even floating dog turds. I bet they all wish they were rainbows. Keep going for the video.

So apparently Queen Elizabeth's royal guard took time out of their busy schedule of standing around while people make funny faces at them to perform the Game of Thrones theme in front of Buckingham Palace. This is a video of that performance. You think the Queen is the one masterminding all the complaints to George R.R. for taking to long to finish the series? "I'm already 88-years old -- George needs to hurry the f*** up!" I imagine her yelling to the roomful of royal guard gathered in a secret command center deep beneath Buckingham Palace. Keep going for the video.

There’s nothing simpler than boiling an egg, but perfecting it is a whole other story. Bon Appetit put together a handy guide to boiling an egg to the correct consistency, for say, a salad nicoise or a hearty shoyu ramen. It goes to show that attention to detail is important in not only design, but everything we do.

Oh, Prince Oberyn. A man as honorable as he was cocky, vengeful as he was loyal, and, ultimately, he who was [insert your own damn spoiler alert here] taken from the realm of Game of Thrones too soon. We’re still not quite over (nor may we ever be) his brutal death at the hand of The Mountain in the season four episode “The Mountain and The Viper,” and it seems as though neither are a lot of you. Turns out the folks at BuzzFeed are equally as obsessive, and have taken to grieving the only way they know how: by turning something tragic into a series of silly GIFs.

But even better than that is perhaps the content: turns out all we needed to get over the death of Oberyn was — in the words of Mrs. Doubtfire — a quick drive-by fruiting of the murderous sort. To watch Pedro Pascal give it to these varied vegetals with the sort of ire and force we’d expect from a man avenging his own death, is just the sort of salve we never knew we needed. Particularly when he goes to town on those cupcakes and that tomato. (The man really knows how to use his hands, eh?)

We’ve included a few of them below (because, I mean, how could we not) but there are even more at the source if you’re interested.

In what way would you murder the fruit (or veg) of your choice, if it were a stand-in for The Mountain? Let’s hear what sort of murdersalad you all would toss together in the comments.

OG anime watchers can ready their collections for this fall, because Manga Entertainment will be re-releasing the first Ghost in the Shell film in glorious high definition. The film’s reissuing is in conjunction with Anchor Bay Entertainment and in celebration of the 25th anniversary of the original Ghost in the Shell manga.

We learned back in January that Rupert Sanders would be directing the live-action film adaptation of the cyberpunk police drama, and fingers are crossed we’ll receive more details on the series’ move away from animation very soon (possibly AX?).

The remastered Blu-ray release is scheduled to hit US store shelves on September 23, for $24.99. Are you looking forward to revisiting the intriguing universe of Ghost in the Shell this fall? Tell us how much you love Motoko and the gang in the comments below.

Japanese distributor Pony Canyon just released the teaser trailer for the first Attack on Titan feature film, and you can get a taste of the murderous giant action below.

For those of you not familiar with Attack on Titan, the anime – based on the manga by Hajime Isayama – takes place in a world under siege by massive Titans: nude, often mindless humanoid creatures that enjoy nothing more than snacking on the surviving human population which has hidden itself inside of walled-off cities. But after one of those walls fails, and Eren Jaeger suffers a terrible loss, our hotheaded protagonist vows to enlist in the military with the hope of killing every Titan he can find.

If some – well, all – of the footage looks familiar, it’s because the feature is a digest-sized version of the hit animated series and award-winning manga. Director Araki Tetsuro edited the feature – titled Attack on Titan Part One: Crimson Bow and Arrow – cutting down the first 13 episodes of the series for this installment, with the followup – subtitled Wings of Freedom – due out in 2015.

Twitchfilm spotted the teaser, which reveals the film’s Japanese release date: November 22. FUNimation distributes the series here in the U.S., so hopefully, it’s only a matter of time before they announce a domestic release for the film.

A live-action film has been in various stages of production since 2012 with director Shinji Higuchi (Hidden Fortress: The Last Princess, Japan Sinks) most recently attached, with distributor Toho recently announcing the cast lead by Crows Zero II actor Haruma Miura. The live-action film has a planned 2015 release.

[Source: Twitchfilm]

Meet Peanut, the winner of the 2014 World's Ugliest Dog competition in Petaluma, California. Peanut is from North Carolina, where he was in a shelter for over six nine months after being abused and burned in a fire. God I hate people. I think if I ever get a terminal illness I'll become a vigilante animal abuser-abuser. Hell, I might even do it without the illness.

"He doesn't have lips anymore. His eyelids are also gone, and so he can't close his eyes so therefore his eyes water. The tears drain into his nose and so he has nice little snot bubbles because of it. So it's great, that adds to his character," Holly Chandler, Peanut's owner told CBS San Francisco. "He's my baby. I guess I don't see him every day as being that ugly. But I guess the judges thought so," Chandler said.

Wait -- you don't think he's ugly? Then why'd you take him to the world's ugliest dog contest? That's like dropping off a skinny kid at fat camp. No, I think you know just how ugly he is. Still, great job giving Peanut a good home -- he deserves it. And so do all the other wonderful shelter pets out there. This message brought to you by the I Wish There'd Come A Day When That Sarah McLachlan SPCA Ad Wasn't Needed Foundation. Keep going for a couple closeups of the little chupacabra.

Meet 26-year old Nicholas Wig. Nicholas broke into the St. Paul, Minnesota home of James Wood and stole his watch, credit cards, money and a cell phone. Plus stripped out of his wet clothes (it had been raining) and took some of Wood's. OH YEAH -- then logged into his own Facebook account and left it open before leaving. Even most grandparents know how to computer better than that. Somehow, this man has managed to not die in 26 years. That is unfathomable to me.

Wood posted to Facebook using Wig's profile, saying Wig had burglarized his home. He even shared his phone number to see if someone would call with information. Wig texted him later that day. "I replied you left a few things at my house last night, how can I get them back to you," Wood said. Wig agreed to meet with Wood later that night. Wood believes Wig was under the impression he would give him back some of his clothes he had left at his home in exchange for a recycled cell phone Wig had stolen.

Wig was arrested on his way to meet Wood, still wearing the victim's watch. He faces a maximum sentence of 10 years in prison and $20,000 fines, although I suggest we just throw him into a volcano. Shit, tell him it's a hot tub and he might jump in himself. Thanks to Thaylor H and brendan, who only leave the houses they've burglarized after logging into their Myspace accounts because then then victims just feel sorry for them.

There’s hardly a better time than E3 for Conan O’Brien to do another installment of his awesome gaming “review” web series Clueless Gamer. In the spirit of E3, Conan got to review an advance copy of the brand new Super Smash Bros. for the Wii U and 3DS. For most people, feigning video game apathy wouldn’t win you many friends, especially if you were lucky enough to test highly anticipated games in advance. Luckily, Conan O’Brien has mastered the alchemy of turning his nonchalant attitude towards gaming into comedy gold.

For months, we’ve been teasing various details on this latest edition of Nintendo’s hit franchise Super Smash Brothers. Indeed, new playable characters include villagers from Animal Crossing, as well as Pokemon new to the Super Smash Bros. multiverse like Charizard and Greninja.

There might be even more exciting details to be announced for Super Smash Bros., since O’Brien received such an advanced copy of the game that it didn’t have any cover art. Of course, O’Brien took it upon himself to make his own cover art, which Nintendo should consider releasing in a limited run. If Conan O’Brien can be a character in WWE 2K14, it would stand to reason that Conan’s cover art, which only features him and has no no hint of any Nintendo franchises, should be showcased somehow.

What other games from E3 would you like to see Conan review for Clueless Gamer? Let us know in the comments below.

A group of guys out for a bachelor party discovered a rare mastadon skull and tusks in the desert of New Mexico, presumably while trying to find a place to bury the stripper.

Randall Gann of the New Mexico Museum of Natural History and Science said the partygoers discovered the fossil earlier this week in Elephant Butte State Park, an area of arid hills surrounding a reservoir about 155 miles (250 km) south of Albuquerque. He said the museum's head paleontologist was amazed by the find, calling it "the most complete mastodon skull with attached tusks he has seen in 20 years."

You know, I've been invited on one of these guy's camping trip bachelor parties before. I didn't go. Something about being out in the middle of the desert with nothing but six other guys and a bunch of booze scares me. Especially with one of them so close to getting married. I mean, what if he decides it's the night to experiment? Out of all my friends I definitely have the nicest butt. Thanks to Brent T and my pal D.j., who are both invited to my bachelor party if and when I ever have one.

Say hello to Miriam Burbank. Now wave goodbye, because she's deceased. And her daughters decided to send her off the way she would have wanted: attending her own kickass party. Mission accomplished. I only wish I could have been there.

With a case of Busch beer by her side, a menthol cigarette in her hand, and a disco ball flashing overhead Miriam Burbank attended her last party. Burbank's two daughters, who call their mom Mae Mae, said she was full of life and they wanted her funeral to reflect that. So they told the funeral home directors at Charbonnet Funeral Home what she liked and came up with this. Aside from the beer and menthol cigarette, Burbank is sitting at a table in a living room type setting. Also the Saints lover has her fingernail painted black and gold. Burbank's daughters said other family members seemed to enjoy this fitting goodbye.

Busch beer, whiskey, the Saints, a disco ball, and crossword puzzles? I feel like Miriam and I would have gotten along great. Hell, I even like the orchids and topiary in the back. It's a shame we never got to meet. At least she'll have a great view to watch Saints games from heaven. "The Saints play in a covered stadium." Pfft, all angels have laser vision. Rest in peace, Miriam. Oh, and make sure to use an ashtray and not flick your cigarette butts in heaven -- Jesus hates that. Thanks to blue16, who has always wanted to attend a party with a dead person. Right? They made it look so fun in Weekend At Bernie's.

Board games became a little more intimidating with the release of 1981′s Jumanji by Chris Van Allsburg. Suddenly you no longer had to focus only on winning the game, you needed to worry about survival. That’s how I felt when I first read the book as a kid. I was convinced the characters of Candy Land were going to come to life and take over my bedroom. Lord Licorice was nowhere near as frightening as the prospect of jungle creatures and natural disasters sweeping in, but it was still scary. I eventually got past my fears, and now, I can appreciate this beautifully hand-crafted Jumanji game by Gemma Wright.

The prop maker has reproduced the board, game pieces, and case to an incredibly detailed degree. She sculpted the raised images on the lid and board and cast them from silicone. She combined the casts with wood, green resin, and lots of carefully applied paint. Wright spent hours on perfecting the hinges alone, so I can only imagine how much time she poured into the project. Her posts about making the board span a few months.

It’s clear from looking at the finished product that all the work was worth it. Her Jumanji set looks even better than the one shown in the 1995 movie. This is the kind of game set that you’d pass down through generations and make up wild tales about. The way it’s painted and stained makes it look like the set has been around for ages, and you could probably get kids to believe it’s a relic. Not that we’re advocating lying to children…

These photos show off all the details of this handmade piece:

If you’re interested in purchasing a complete board, you can get Gemma’s contact information in this post. No price is listed but given the high quality of the set, don’t expect it to be cheap.

Would you take a chance and play Jumanji if you had a board like this? Let us know in the comments.

HT: The A.V. Club