Greendinos

“This is a photo of my mom taken back when she was 16. Let’s just say she’s a Star Wars fan.”

(submitted by Rae)

The post Star Wars Struck appeared first on AwkwardFamilyPhotos.com.

A short-lived 80′s fashion trend called “I’ve just been committed” chic.

(submitted by Ashley)

Books are wonderful entertainment, gum, and weapons. Many parents read whole stories and don’t skip pages but I wouldn’t know anything about that. Being a scholar, I love books. When you’re done texting take a moment to learn about toddler favorites.

1. The Giving Tree

Don’t be confused by the title. This book is about taking, more specifically, taking everything you can and then taking a bit more just to be safe.

In this book a young boy with beautiful overalls kills a tree over the course of many years.

I love this story because it shows me that everything is mine just like I thought. “Reach for the stars,” this book says, “hit them out of the sky with a stick.”

2. Blueberries For Sal

Oh I love this book.

This is a heartwarming tale about a kid tragically named Sal. After Sal and her mother lose everything they are forced to steal fruit from nature. Like all gifted children, Sal cannot control her behavior and almost gets her and her mother killed by bears. This does not change how Santa feels about Sal or how many presents she will receive because forgiveness is the key.

My favorite part is where Sal steals food and nobody yells. Imagine that.

3. The Very Hungry Caterpillar

This is as book about an insect who will soon be dead because it has no instincts. It’s a very sad story so don’t read it at night or if you’re alone.

The moral of this story is to not eat people food unless you’re a people. Should go without saying.

Enjoy the life-like photos in this horrible tale. This book will melt if you give it a bath so keep your receipt.

4. The Freshest Produce For Less

This is a book that I read when I need a good scare. It’s frightening- keep it away from those with weak dispositions.

The first time I saw The Freshest Produce For Less I threw up pure milk.

Next to each food you’ll see a number. That’s how many tears it has caused.

The “Great Fresh Variety” section will make you wonder if anyone cares.

Only read this book on Mondays so that you have the whole week to get right.

Dear mama,

It’s not your birthday but this poem is for you. It’s just something to think about. Nobody’s perfect.

love, your HT

You Look Prettier When You Smile

Thanks for coming last night

It’s nice to know someone cares

My blanket was twisted

And I thought I heard bears

You whispered promises and threats

For, LOL, quite a while

But next time remember

You look prettier when you smile

There’s no need for scowls

When I need midnight water

Dehydration’s a thing

Weren’t you once a young daughter?

Please bring the right cup

I could drain the whole Nile

Relax your face, mama

You look prettier when you smile

What’s that in the hall?

It smells bad and looks fudgy

Was it caused by a child so beautiful and pudgy?

Why name names? Let’s move on.

The poop’s deep in the tile

Grab the Lysol but keep in mind

You look prettier when you smile

I was dressed head to toe

Despite putting up a fight

We wrestled with pants

It took all of your might

Now my clothes can be found

In a haphazard pile

Are you mad? Hey mom:

You look prettier when you smile

You are my angel day in and day out

But angels don’t swear and they definitely don’t shout

So when we’re together and I do something vile

 Keep the crazy eyes in check

You look prettier when you smile

This is how I felt when I found out.

Here, we get a rare glimpse of the Cowardly Lion as a baby.

Thanks dgnb

If only we could control our families.

(submitted by Caleb)

The Downward Spiral. Artwork by Russell Mills (re-photographed for the Deluxe Edition by Rob Sheridan).

These are available as hi-resolution wallpapers here.

Released in 2002 as an Easter Egg on the And All That Could Have Been DVD (that release has many secrets), this video is a hybrid of footage from the song’s scrapped 1999 music video and live footage from the 2000 Fragility tour. Original music video footage filmed by Tomato. Editing and live footage by Rob Sheridan.

The Fragile production journals. Published on the first version of nin.com during the final weeks of recording the album, June/July 1999.

Real men wear heels.

(submitted by Dawn)

So you've probably seen the graduation wreck from Reddit that went viral this week. You know, this one:

Everyone's been focusing on the misspellings, but the real unsung "hero" here is that spacing.

This thing has been EVERYWHERE this week, and the way people are reacting - with the ROTFL-ing and the up-voting and re-posting on every major news site and all the OMG THIS IS THE FUNNIEST THING I'VE EVER SEEN LOLOLOLOL - well, I might be starting to empathize with a side of chopped liver.

[cuing up violin]

I mean, remember the time we had that "celebiation of learnin"?

And when the Wicssaset Gardautes were Cogngrtaualated?

Or what about my Graduaccion, guys? What about that?

Go d! GO. Bless you.

[sniffling] Five years in, I tell ya, and it's almost like the tossel WASN'T worth the hastle:

And that hurts, guys. IT HURTS.

[staring dramatically out rain-streaked window]

We just never seem to Imagin, Draem, OR Achive together anymore:

And we used to...[lip wobble]...we used to DREM BIG. Remember?

[blowing nose]

Look, I know you have funny cake needs. I do. And I guess sometimes you're going to look at someone ELSE's funny cakes. But you know what? At the end of the day, I'll still be here, serving up your Cograts on Garautions:

And also because this Oreo addiction isn't going to pay for itself. 

But mostly that first thing.

Thanks to Sara M., Brooke B., Yvette A., Cynthia, Lizzie & Taylor, Ashlee R., Sarah B., & Susan H. for always loving me unconditionally, and also for knowing better than to challenge me to a baby shower wreck-off. [evil grin]