IKEA Monkey

Unwrap that tin foil, grab some napkins and dig in. Our staff has selected the cream of the crop and shared some of our favorite burritos in the city. [ more › ]

All other things being equal, the south, parts of the west, and upper midwest are the happiest places in the United States according to a recent study.

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The National Park Service has been closely monitoring mountain lion residents of the Santa Monica Mountains National Recreation Area for more than a decade. The mountains' proximity to Los Angeles means the cougars need to contend with ever-encroaching human development, and the Park Service wants to keep tabs on the population. Part of how they do so is with camera traps set up throughout the mountain lions' habitat. Recently, the Park Service released a series of incredible photographs captured by a camera trap that show a mother mountain lion and her two 15-month old cubs. Check them out below.

P-32, the male cub, checks out the camera.

P-33, the female cub, is seen here, having lost the collar she was fitted with in mid-February. After a series of photos surfaced of her mother and siblings, biologists worried P-33 hadn't survived, but here she is looking happy and healthy.

And here's mom, P-19.

Mom in the foreground with her daughter behind her.

If you look closely, all three mountain lions are in this shot.

In this photo, you can clearly see the male cub (P-32) is wearing a specially designed collar made for sub-adult mountain lions that automatically falls off as they grow larger.

Here, P-33 shows off the papillae—small, backward curving spines that help remove hair from the hide and scrape meat from the bones—that coat mountain lion tongues.

P-33 digs in to her meal.

P-33, who actually beat her mother and brother to the kill site by about an hour, notices the camera.

All photos courtesy of the National Park Service Flickr.

[h/t takepart]

Who knows if wood nymph Shailene Woodley has evolved from eating mud and sunning her vagina, but she's definitely still a nomad. Woodley is profiled in the April issue of Elle magazine, and her homeless status is right there on the cover: "Beauty! Brains! Talent! Shailene has it all. Except for a place to sleep tonight..." Ominous...

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[body_image width='640' height='480' path='images/content-images/2015/03/12/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/03/12/' filename='talking-to-a-guy-who-found-happiness-through-self-amputation-body-image-1426173977.jpg' id='35456']

Image via Flickr user Batik Kaftan Crafts

Body Integrity Identity Disorder ( BIID) is rare psychological condition that causes sufferers feel like a limb, or limbs, don't belong to their bodies. These people often develop a preoccupation with amputation, and in some cases resort to self-administered surgery. Neurological recognition of BIID only came about in the mid 1990s, but early research indicates that it stems from a flaw in the brain's right parietal lobe, which houses the body's internal body map. This has led many to view it as a physiological defect, rather than a psychological condition.

I've been fascinated by BIID since I heard about it. Just what exactly would drive someone to amputate a healthy limb? To find an answer to this question, I joined a Yahoo group for sufferers called "Fighting it" that's been around since the end of 2001 and currently has 2,356 members, including a 30-year-old guy who I'll call "John." He was reluctant to describe how he actually removed his leg, but was happy to discuss how he got to that point.

VICE: Hi John, can you describe how BIID first affected you?
John: It was my left leg below the knee that bothered me. I was into my early teens when I figured out that I wanted to be an amputee. It was an alien realization—but then looking back, I remember playing as a young child and pretending to be an amputee.

What was it about the leg that bothered you?
It's hard to describe what it was like to have a limb that didn't belong. Every step felt odd and it even felt odd sitting. If I got busy I would forget about it but the feeling come back as soon as I stopped. There were periods when the feeling was less troubling and times when it was worse. I felt like I was probably the only person to think that way but eventually I found a couple of Yahoo groups and that gave me some comfort. But there was always the little annoying buzz in the back of my mind.

Did you often think about getting it removed?
Of course. And obviously a nice, safe, painless surgery would have been the first choice. But that option wasn't open, so I was left trying to figure out the least terrible alternative. I will tell you about a plan I had when I was about 15. I was going to pretend to fall off my bike and put my leg under a train. Then, after the leg was off, I'd coast to a pay phone. I don't know if that was stupidity or desperation.

What was happening in your life when you decided you were ready to be an amputee? How were you feeling?
My life was good and stable and that's what made the time right. I'd decided I wanted it gone a dozen years before. I was pretty level and just knew I could do it. I felt just a little bit more strong than apprehensive.

But then how did you feel the morning you went through with it? Were you nervous?
I was super nervous. I just knew that somehow three dozen lead pellets would find their way through my leg. I was so nervous I almost threw up, but I knew it would give me the best chance to relieve my discomfort, so I counted to three. Later, when it was done, I was awash with relief. It was over and I was free.

How did you feel when you got to the hospital?
Most of the fear left me once the pain really hit and help was on the way. I believed I was going to live and it was just a matter of recovering.

Are you ever tempted to remove the other one?
The rest of my body is mine and I would very, very much like to keep it. I suspect that I'd handle losing another limb better than most due to prior experience, but I'd still be quite upset. I don't find the disease is addictive like tattoos and piercings seem to be. And even if I desired another amputation, I think my bravery was all used up the first time. Imagine, truly imagine, engineering a situation where the bones and muscles in a limb are to sustain such damage as to preclude any attempt at salvage despite the advances of modern medicine.

Do you ever miss your leg?
Sometimes, but I'm not sure if it's because I miss my leg or because it reminds me I'm a nut. Whenever I doubt my decision I just remember the discomfort.

I found it hard to find someone willing to talk to me about this. Why did you decide to share?
I'm not the first to take matters into my own hands, and I won't be the last. The issue is that sufferers of BIID should be accepted enough to ask for help so they don't have to go to such great lengths. That's why I'm speaking out.

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One thing the creator of "Breaking Bad" finds bad is fans who have been throwing pizzas at the New Mexico home that was featured on the show.

   Stella McCartney: for when you want clothes that look like they’re quitting. Read More ...

A few years ago, Howard M. Bender and a friend went out to grab some breakfast. But instead of getting pork bacon, they opted for the healthier option, ordering turkey bacon instead. But when it arrived at their table, they were disappointed: The turkey bacon was hard and dry and not like real bacon at all. And so Bender—a chef who had trained at the Culinary Institute of America—decided to come up with a better option. He spent three years formulating Schmacon, a whole-muscle, smoked and glazed beef bacon that just launched a Kickstarter campaign.

Bender makes it clear that Schmacon—which won the National Restaurant Association’s Food and Beverage Innovation (FABI) award in 2014—isn’t coming for your traditional pork bacon. “We weren’t trying to replace pork bacon when we were developing Schmacon,” Bender says in the Kickstarter video. “We’re looking at some of the alternatives that are out there and saying ‘You know what? You don’t need to eat turkey bacon anymore, because there’s a great alternative to your pork bacon that you can have for breakfast, lunch, or dinner.’”

Still, Bender points out that Schmacon has some advantages over pork bacon: “It’s lower in calories, fat, and sodium than almost all of the pork bacons that are out on the market today,” he says. Schmacon is also all-natural and uncured with no nitrates.

So how does the stuff actually taste when compared with regular bacon? I grabbed a package of store brand pork bacon and noticed a few differences right off the bat: It was much easier to pull off strips of pork bacon from the mass than it was to get the Schmacon free—I tore more than a few strips and even ended up cooking a few stuck together. But Schmacon’s deep red color was much more appealing than the pork bacon’s light pink. Cooking the Schmacon took less than 10 minutes, and it perfectly achieved that wavy shape. And while Schmacon doesn’t taste that much like pork bacon, it is delicious, smoky-sweet and full of flavor (so full of flavor, in fact, that it brought to mind an easy-to-eat beef jerky). I inhaled it and left all but one piece of the pork bacon in the pan.

Schmacon is currently available in some restaurants, but if you’re Interested in trying it in your own home, contribute to the Kickstarter—$30 will get you a pack of Schmacon shipped directly to your door.

Admittedly, a truck full of cheese would be a tempting sight for many, yours truly included. But some dastardly villain took things a step too far, swiping a tractor-trailer filled with multiple tons of mozzarella cheese, keeping it from heading off into the delicious pizza sunset it was destined for. That’s just wrong.

The truckload of shredded mozzarella was originally bound for a pizza distribution center in Florida, reports Ocala.com. The amount swiped is enough cheese for tens of thousands of pizza pies, the site notes, making the crime that much more real.

According to the police, the driver left the locked trailer in a truck parking lot while he was having the hauler checked out by a mechanic. The next day when his girlfriend drove by the lot to check on the refrigerated trailer, she saw it was missing.

Police found that a hauler attached to another trailer had also been taken, presumably to have something to haul the trailer with. While the cheese is estimated to be worth about $85,000, the trailer itself is valued at $62,000 and the missing hauler is worth $130,000, according to reports.

Truck, trailer, tons of mozzarella stolen from parking lot in Summerfield [Ocala.com]

In the second installment of our Fall/Winter 2015 Fashion Month series entitled "Fuck a ____; Wear a _____ ," we bid a glad adieu to the tents we were wearing two weeks ago and say major fucking bonjour to these fashionable sleeping bags proffered this week by the god Rei Kawakubo for Comme des Garçons.

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Emanuel's move comes days after Chuy Garcia vowed to eliminate the program if elected. [ more › ]

Your lips have barely survived the dryness of never-ending winter, and after a week of blazer weather they'll be subjected to the disgusting heat of summer once again. You need lip balm, but which one? Tell us in the comments.

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When you try doing something uncomfortable or scary each day , you grow in your career and skills. These tasks don't always have immediate results, though. If you think of it like sending out a ship, you'll appreciate that not all these missions pan out.

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Last year, the Arizona Diamondbacks introduced the world to the D-Bat Dog, a $25, 18-inch corn dog stuffed with cheese and bacon. This year the baseball team has decided to go a more sugary route, introducing the Churro Dog, which is essentially, a churro wrapped in a doughnut.

Gone is the tube of pork parts, and in its place is the fried dough dessert covered in cinnamon and sugar, nestled in a “long john chocolate glazed donut, which is then topped with frozen yogurt, caramel and chocolate sauces,” ESPN’s Darren Rovell reports.

“We’ve found that desserts work really well in the heat we have here,” D-backs president Derrick Hall said.

Rovell says the offering is the team’s attempt to go above and beyond last year’s D-Bat Dog, as teams like them and others are realizing that fans will splash out more cash on food if it’s unique.

Would you pay $25 for a regular corn dog? Nope. Boring. But if it’s 18 inches and stuffed with all kinds of things and is only available for one season, why not?

This year the price of novelty won’t be quite as dear: the Churro Dog is a bit cheaper than last year’s specialty dog, selling for just $8.50 at two stands on the main concourse at Chase Field.

Diamondbacks offer Churro Dog [ESPN]

 So, I have a theory: I think Hilary Duff waited to file for divorce until right before her Cosmo cover came out, so that her interview would get more media traction because people could — and since did – frame it as, “Hilary Duff Breaks Her Silence On Divorce,” and “Hilary Duff Tells Cosmo The Real Story,” Read More ...

The Seth Rollins vs. Jon Stewart feud just got physical.

In case you haven’t been following along, the issue between the two started with Seth Rollins threw shade at ‘The Daily Show’ during a segment on Raw. Stewart responded by cutting a promo, Rollins responded and the two came face-to-face on ‘The Daily Show’ itself.

Rollins continued the beef on Monday’s Raw, staging his own Daily Show episode in the middle of the ring, complete with jokes about Rosewater, anti-New Jersey cracks and J&J Security cackling in the background. Stewart arrived via entrance music and pre-prepared TitanTron video, confronted Rollins and ran him down for being “a swat team stripper with Lady Gaga’s hair.”

Their argument almost came to blows until Randy Orton interrupted, and then it came to … uh, low blows as Stewart escaped. And now here it is, your moment of zen.

The owner of an elderly cancer-stricken canine says she was just hoping for some wagon-building advice from Home Depot employees but she ended up with something much more — a custom-built cart for her ill furry friend.

The woman tells KABC-TV that she wanted to build a cart to help tote around her 15-year-old dog Ike, who has cancer in his leg. She went to the Home Depot in Hawthorne, CA, where she asked for some input from an employee.

“I showed him the cart that I was trying to use and I asked him, ‘What can I do to change this cart and build it so that it’s longer or his size?’ He just shook his head and said, ‘Let me give it some thought and I’ll call you later,'” she recalls.

But rather than just sketch up something for the customer to assemble, the Home Depot worker and another employee went ahead and built a new wagon, complete with built-on ramp, for the pooch.

“I offered to build this for her and let her know that it’s something that Home Depot offers – giving back to our customers,” explains the employee, who is also building a ramp to help get Ike in and out of the car.

   Yes, this coat is great. But really, you just want to watch Idris Elba walk around. Read More ...

An intense and disturbing investigative piece published by the Arkansas Times alleges that State Representative Justin Harris, a devout Christian who also owns a religious preschool, gave away two little girls he and his wife had adopted six months before. The little girls were "re-homed" with a former teacher at the preschool, who then sexually abused one of them.

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They’re cute. They’re cuddly. They’re killers.

An Applebee’s customer who says he was burned while leaning over a plate of hot fajitas to pray before his meal can’t sue the restaurant, an appellate court ruled yesterday, because the hot food presented an “open and obvious” danger.

A New Jersey man had been seeking damages from his local Applebee’s Neighborhood Grill and Bar after an incident dating back to March 2010, reports the Courier-Post.

He claimed that as he bowed his head “close to the table,” he heard a “loud sizzling noise followed by a ‘pop noise’ and then felt a burning sensation in his left eye and on his face.”

According to an incident report, the man said he was burned on his face, neck and arms after “grease popped” on the fajitas.

His lawsuit alleges that the waitress didn’t warn him ahead of time that the dish was hot, and that as a result, he suffered “serious and permanent” injuries “solely as a result of (Applebee’s) negligence when he came in contact with a dangerous and hazardous condition, specifically, ‘a plate of hot food’.”

A trial judge had already dismissed the suit, saying that Applebee’s wasn’t required to warn the customer “against a danger that is open and obvious.”

The customer appealed, but the two-judge appellate panel agreed, noting that the risk from a plate of hot fajitas was “self-evident,” the court ruled, saying Applebee’s had no duty to warn [the customer] that the food was sizzling hot and should be approached with due care.”

The thought here being, if you’re ordering fajitas, even if you’ve never heard of them before, putting your face close to an obviously hot dish spitting oil is not a good idea.

Man burned by fajitas while praying can’t sue Applebee’s [The Courier-Post]

Here's the newest member of Shedd Aquarium's canine family. [ more › ]

Dan Stevens, the most important person on Downton Abbey (based only on his attractiveness) has been cast as The Beast in Beauty and the Beast. Please squee yourself silly and carry on.

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FOUND by Kelly in her yard.
Kids walk past my house to get to and from the school bus. I hope David didn’t have to do this all over again.
I WILL NOT LITTER / LOSE THINGS.
I WILL NOT LITTER / LOSE THINGS.
I WILL NOT LITTER / LOSE THINGS….

Hell yeah. That looks cool and interesting, and also really sweet and just somehow right. If you'd like to purchase a similar-looking photo shoot for your own small baby, you should hit up All Seasons Photo in New London, Wisconsin, where the Facebook page explains their Future Bride photo shoots like this:

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Like reality television cockroaches, the Kardashian-Jenner klan is not only indestructible—they're multiplying. E! is considering a spinoff show for Kendall and Kylie Jenner, because of course they are. This follows the news that Kris Jenner just signed a new multi-million dollar contract with the network.

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The city of Cleveland said that "losses" resulting from Tamir Rice's death were brought on by actions of the boy and his family.

I first covered the Conservative Political Action Conference in 2012, back in the early days of the last Republican presidential primary, when Rick Santorum still seemed like a semi-credible option, and Ron Paul was leading his guerilla takeover of backwater local GOP executive boards. Heady with intra-party rivalries, and still deep in the throes of the Tea Party fever dream, the annual conservative hoedown was at peak l, propping up the darkest elements of the right-wing fringe.

Herman Cain was there, decrying the "gutter politics" that had exposed his habit of harassing women who weren't his wife in a keynote speech. There was a panel on "The Failure of Multiculturism: How the Pursuit of Diversity Is Weakening the American Identity," featuring two prominent white nationalists, and another on "Islamic Law in America," about the creeping scourge of sharia in US courts. The whole thing reached a frenzied peak when a wild-eyed Andrew Breitbart marched outside to go "toe-to-toe" with Occupy Wall Street protesters camped outside the venue, and had to be pulled away by security.

Three years later, a pack of CPAC attendees once again went toe-to-toe with protestors, but this time, the protesters were white nationalists, members of the neo-Confederate League of the South up to picket the conservative gathering. As the event wound down on Saturday, young activists, sporting their proudly CPAC lanyards and Stand With Rand pins, came out to confront the demonstrations, starting a chanting duel that quickly devolved into heated arguments on the sidewalk outside the convention center.

"You actually think the US should separate into different states?" one kid asked a bearded protester carrying a sign that read "Obama Hates White People...And So Does The GOP." "It's just...I mean...," the kid struggled to find the words. "It's disgusting," his companion volunteered. Across the street another blazered CPACer shook his head dejectedly. "I'm sorry about this," he told a nearby photographer. "I'm from 'Nova. We don't do that there."

[body_image width='800' height='933' path='images/content-images/2015/03/01/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/03/01/' filename='cpac-conservatives-are-losing-their-lunatic-edge-301-body-image-1425225413.jpg' id='31765']

A member of the League of the South demonstrates outside CPAC Saturday. Photo by Kalley Erickson

Obviously, this is a reasonable reaction to any Neo-Confederate disruption, but it also hints at a tonal shift that could be detected throughout the three-day event. Once reliably cuckoo, CPAC was disarmingly relaxed—even reasonable—this year, notably lacking in the kind of internecine flame-throwing, and racist dog-whistles that have characterized the conference in the past. Two years after the Republican National Committee warned the party that it would have to be a lot nicer if it ever wanted to win another election, grassroots conservatives seem to have gotten the message.

Under new leadership, the American Conservative Union, which hosts CPAC, made a concerted effort to tone down the spectacle in 2015, and project a sleeker, more inclusive vibe. There were no sinister Kirk Cameron documentaries, no biting immigration tirades from Ann Coulter. Mike Huckabee, the leading evangelical prospect for 2016, didn't attend this year's conference. Rick Santorum, another Christian conservative favorite, talked mostly about foreign policy, rather than social issues—though most of the audience wandered out during his speech anyway.

Amazingly, even Sarah Palin veered away from her usual script, giving a thoughtful speech about the challenges facing veterans when they return home. " America hands over her sons and her daughters in service with the promise that they're going to be taken care of," she said. "Well we, their mothers and their fathers and their husbands and their wives, we're here to collect on the promises made. We can't wait for D.C. to fix their bureaucratic blunders. This bureaucracy is killing our vets." Then, to everyone's surprise, she proposed a series of very reasonable ways Congress could address the issue. Last year, she read her own version of Dr. Seuss.

Of course, CPAC wasn't totally devoid of the fringe. On Friday, for example, hidden-camera activist James O'Keefe hired someone to walk around his party dressed as Osama bin Laden. And in what was probably the highlight of the weekend, Duck Dynasty star Phil Robertson went on an extended riff about STDs, or what he likes to call "the revenge of the hippies."

"I don't want you to come down with a debilitating disease. I don't want you to die early. You're disease-free and she's disease-free, you marry, you keep your sex right there," Robertson informed an afternoon audience. "I'm trying to help you, for crying out loud. America, if I didn't care about you, why would I bring this up?"

For the most part, though, the conference was lucid, even normal. Everywhere you looked, Republicans were talking about policy ideas and proposals that could appeal beyond the ultra-conservative grassroots activists in attendance. CPAC organizers, long resentful of the overwhelming presence of young, libertarian-minded activists at the annual confab, seemed to embrace them this year, hosting talks on issues like asset forfeiture, criminal justice reform, and digital currency.

In a marijuana legalization debate on the main stage Thursday, former New Mexico Governor Gary Johnson, who ran for president on the Libertarian ticket in 2012, gave an impassioned attack on prohibition, at one point faking a heart attack to prove some point. "Having a debate about marijuana legalization is like having a debate about whether the sun is going to come up tomorrow. The sun is going to come up. Marijuana is going to be legalized," Johnson declared, to raucous cheers. ""Conservatives ought to embrace the fact that these are people making their own decision, he added.

Democrats laughed off the idea that CPAC was broadening its appeal beyond the fringe. "If CPAC is trying to be more inclusive, they sure have a weird way of showing it," Democratic National Committee spokesman Rob Flaherty told VICE. "Its attendees loudly supported Civil Rights Act skeptic Rand Paul, gave an award to proud homophobe Phil Robertson, and once again attempted to exclude the Log Cabin Republicans. If this is what inclusivity looks like, the Republican Party should be embarrassed...and worried."

After years of demanding strict ideological purity from Republican candidates, grassroots activists at CPAC seemed to have tamed their cannibalistic impulses somewhat, making efforts to expand the movement. Even former Florida Governor Jeb Bush, who took a beating from other speakers, as well as a noisy contingent of booers, managed to engage skeptics in a lively Q&A Friday. And while all of the likely 2016 candidates who spoke affirmed their opposition to same-sex marriage, gay Republicans were publicly welcomed to the conference after years of being snubbed by conference organizers.

As The Nation's Michelle Goldberg suggests, the sudden turn toward even-keeled professionalism could be problematic for Democrats, who have based their entire election strategy on the notion that Republicans are crazy extremists who hate women, gays, and poor people. That argument is less effective if conservative candidates can sound reasonable, and avoid issues that alienate those voters.

"A preoccupation with social issues destroyed us in 2012," said Gregory Angelo, executive director of the Log Cabin Republicans, the conservative gay rights group that was initially excluded from CPAC but eventually invited to speak on a panel. "We left out these issues in 2014," he added, "and we won everywhere. Republicans need to remember what happened in 2014, and keep that momentum going."

At this point, it's not clear how far will go in helping to rebrand the GOP. But as Republicans seek to expand the party, it's a sign that conservatives might be willing to sacrifice some of their crazier elements in order to appeal to a broader swath of voters. "I don't think the Republican Party is as in line with those louder voices as some might think— I think the trend is going well," said Armand Cortellesso, a 30-year-old activist from Polk County, Florida. "Nobody is going to listen to your economic policy if you start off by saying that everyone isn't equal in the first place."

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