Shared posts

26 May 15:24

Heat wave kills hundreds

IKEA Monkey

climate isn't changing, part 1

More than 700 people have lost their lives in the past week in a sustained and severe heatwave in India.
26 May 02:37

72,000 Ladybugs Released in High School Senior Prank

IKEA Monkey

Dude, ladybugs STINK

A senior prank in which 72,000 ladybugs were released in a public high school has several youths and adults facing criminal charges.







26 May 01:17

Beware of Ticks: Lyme Disease May Be More Common This Year

by Beth Skwarecki on Vitals, shared by Whitson Gordon to Lifehacker
IKEA Monkey

Hey New JErsey, are you OK

This year may be a bad one for Lyme and other tick-borne diseases. One group of parasitologists is predicting “higher than usual threat” in areas where Lyme is already common, and the disease continues to gain territory every year (as the CDC maps above show).

Read more...









25 May 23:53

Unusually Buff Kangaroo Moves Into Australian Neighborhood

by Marie Lodi
IKEA Monkey

Problems I don't need to think about because I don't LIVE IN AUSTRLIA

A kangaroo with unusually large muscles has recently taken up residence in a Brisbane suburb, prompting locals to ask, “Who’s this new stud in town?” The kangaroo is like, “Bro, do you even lift?” Resident Linda Hellyar almost ran into the animal when she was out walking her dogs one day. “He’s very intimidating. He’s a big boy,” she said. “He’s got massive, massive muscles, big pecs and everything.”

Read more...








25 May 22:52

Turn Your Favorite Snack Food into Seasoning with a Spice Grinder

by Heather Yamada-Hosley

Add an extra punch of flavor to dishes by grinding up tasty Doritos or Cheetos. Doritos dusted popcorn is so much better than regular popcorn.

Read more...









25 May 22:10

Who Among Us Knows When to Take Advil vs. Tylenol?

by Tracy Moore
IKEA Monkey

MEEEE! Advil (or Motrin/ibuprofen) after drinking, but with food (it can irritate the stomach). Tylenol only if you're pregnant because its terrible for your liver.

There are a lot of things that, much to my embarrassment, I have only learned recently. One thing is that the word “segue” is not “segway.” The other is when to take ibuprofen and when to take acetaminophen. The former is a perfectly acceptable thing to eventually discover; the other is a massive failure of civilization.

Read more...








25 May 21:06

Avoid Fighting Over Who Does the Dishes by Making It a Competition

by Patrick Allan
IKEA Monkey

Or get all your friends, take them to a psychologists' office, and have her evaluate all of you for your particular quirks and then let HER decide who does the dishes (spoiler alert, its Dee)

Doing the dishes is a simple chore, but for some reason, nobody ever wants to do them. By making it a competition with something at stake, everyone in the household might want to make an effort.

Read more...









23 May 15:54

Learn How to Properly Order and Make Martinis with This Infographic

by Patrick Allan
IKEA Monkey

They need one of these behind every bar, too. I can't tell you how many times I've ordered a "Very dry" martini only to get a cupload of vermouth.

Martini’s are a sophisticated drink, but they can be daunting if you don’t know the ingredients or lingo. This infographic explains everything you need to know about ordering and making one the most iconic cocktails there is.

Read more...









23 May 15:51

Save and Reform Leftover Mozzarella Bits with a Bath In Boiling Water

by Patrick Allan

When you use a recipe that calls for mozzarella, you sometimes get stuck with a bunch of leftover bits that may not seem too useful. A quick bath in boiling water, however, can help bring all those bits back into a single ball of mozzarella again.

Read more...









23 May 15:51

Review: McDonald's - Chorizo Breakfast Bowl

by Q
IKEA Monkey

Overall, I really like McDonald's Chorizo Breakfast Bowl. The meatloaf texture might be hit or miss for some but I thought it was interesting and the taste was spot-on.

McDonald's Chorizo Breakfast Bowl features chorizo and egg on a hash brown with shredded cheddar jack cheese and pico de gallo on top.

I paid $3.99 for one and it included salsa on the side (labelled "Mexican salsa" for whatever reason). It came in a fairly small-looking container but was pretty filling and had a decent heft to it.

Interestingly, rather than a scrambled mixture of chorizo and egg, they combined the two into somewhat of a breakfast meatloaf. It has a moist combo of fluffy egg binding together bits of chorizo sausage.

Flavor-wise, the egg doesn't really figure in but they hit the right seasoning for the chorizo; there isn't any heat to it, though, if you were hoping for the spicy variety.

The hash brown lost much of its crunch sitting at the very bottom. The potato paired well with the chorizo-loaf but the hash brown would have definitely been better on top (I guess they put it on the bottom for aesthetic reasons).

The pico de gallo added some tartness but not much flavor on the onion or cilantro front. It was also fairly mushy, but that's usually the case at most establishments.

The cheese was the typical overly mild stuff common in Fast Food Land; it offered the standard gooey but bland creamy factor.

Overall, I really like McDonald's Chorizo Breakfast Bowl. The meatloaf texture might be hit or miss for some but I thought it was interesting and the taste was spot-on. The other components, while middling, complimented the chorizo well with just enough variety.
Read more at Brand Eating!
23 May 15:32

Cry-Baby of the Week: A Man Drowned His Neighbor's Dog Because It Wouldn't Stop Barking

by Jamie Lee Curtis Taete
IKEA Monkey

The first guy, ugh

Cry-Baby #1: Stephen Woodhouse

[body_image width='1000' height='692' path='images/content-images/2015/05/21/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/05/21/' filename='cry-baby-of-the-week-a-man-drowned-his-neighbors-dog-because-it-wouldnt-stop-barking-312-body-image-1432245347.jpg' id='58668']

Stephen Woodhouse. Screencaps via ITV and Google Maps

The incident: A man's neighbor's dog wouldn't stop barking.

The appropriate response: Resolving the issue with the neighbors or the local authorities, depending on the circumstances.

The actual response: He drowned and later mutilated the dog.

Stephen Woodhouse, a 52-year-old pilot from the village of Long Buckby, England, was mowing his lawn last July, when he grew annoyed by the barking of his neighbor's dog.

Stephen had reportedly had issues with the dog, a border terrier named Meg, in the past, which he claimed he could hear barking from "morning until night."

He leaned over the fence, picked up the dog, and carried her to an area of his property where construction work was being done.

"There was some building work being done and a big bucket of water," Stephen later told police. "So I stuck it in the bucket until it stopped moving. I never thought of the consequences."

Once the dog was dead, Stephen hid her body under a hedge.

Worried that the dog might be tracked by the microchip in her neck, Stephen returned to the body that night and used a knife to cut the chip out.

When the dog's owners, Alan and Alison Boddington, realized that the dog was missing, they launched a village-wide search operation. They were especially keen to find the dog because they had bought it as a companion for their disabled daughter, who died last year of an asthma attack at the age of ten. Dozens of neighbors and friends joined in the search.

Eventually, Alison, the dog's owner, grew suspicious that Stephen might have been involved, and searched his car. After finding dog hair and a rope, she called police.

Stephen reportedly told police, "I reached my wits' end. All I could think of was that the noise had to stop. It was driving me bloody mad."

After pleading guilty, he was spared jail, but had to pay £3,200 ($5,000) in fines.

Stephen has also reportedly been suspended from his job as a pilot pending an investigation to determine whether he is mentally fit to fly.

One of the villagers who talked to the Daily Mail said, "He hated pets and kids. Nobody likes him... In the entirety of the old village you couldn't find anyone that would say a good word about him."

Presumably this incident hasn't done a great deal to help his image.

Cry-Baby #2: Elizabeth Hogrefe

[body_image width='946' height='704' path='images/content-images/2015/05/21/' crop='images/content-images-crops/2015/05/21/' filename='cry-baby-of-the-week-a-man-drowned-his-neighbors-dog-because-it-wouldnt-stop-barking-312-body-image-1432248774.jpg' id='58671']

Screencap via Google Maps

The incident: A woman's boyfriend was snoring.

The appropriate response: Nudging him, then buying him anti-snoring products, then, if that does nothing and it bothers you enough, breaking up with him.

The actual response: She allegedly beat him with a crowbar.

Last week, Elizabeth Hogrefe (pictured above) was staying at a motel in Lincoln, Nebraska, with her unnamed 58-year-old boyfriend.

During the night, the boyfriend allegedly awoke to find Elizabeth yelling at him while beating him with a crowbar.

According to police, the boyfriend fled the room and staggered down the road. A motorist who saw the injured man reportedly called the police.

When police found the man at a nearby convenience store, they say they found three large welts on his back that were "consistent with being hit with a pry bar."

A spokesperson for the Lincoln Police Department told the Lincoln Journal Star that Elizabeth had attacked the sleeping man because he was snoring.

Elizabeth was arrested and charged with misdemeanor domestic assault. She is currently in jail awaiting trial—hopefully not in a cell with a snorer.

Which one of these noise-haters is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll down here:

Previously: A woman who got a man arrested after he smashed her car window to save her dog vs. a guy who allegedly shot a dog because it "made a mess".

Winner: The guy who shot a dog :(

Follow Jamie Lee Curtis Taete on Twitter.

23 May 15:13

Cops Escort Girls Without Fathers to 'Daddy Daughter Dance'

IKEA Monkey

sweet

Dozens of girls being raised without fathers weren't left out when the Chicago Police Department held it's first-ever "Daddy Daughter Dance."







23 May 14:45

Catholic Ireland OKs same-sex marriage

IKEA Monkey

The quotes from the people who opposed gay marriage are the most surprising part of this whole story. They sound fair and congratulatory to the people who voted for gay marriage. Whaaaat??? Hey, USA, more of this.

Ireland has become the first country to legalize same-sex marriage through popular vote. FULL STORY
23 May 14:42

Witness Steps In Path of Bizarre Slow-Speed Pursuit

IKEA Monkey

This is the most California thing ever.

A bizarre slow-speed chase ended peacefully when a man stepped into traffic and in front of the car and stopped it, forcing the driver to surrender.







23 May 11:13

The Rock Officiated A Surprise Wedding For His ‘Bestie’ In The Best Prank Ever

by Brandon Stroud
IKEA Monkey

OH MY GOD HE IS THE BEST WATCH THE VIDEO

You’ve seen The Rock do a lot in his acting and pro wrestling careers, but have you ever seen him officiate a surprise wedding?

Comedian Nick Mundy (whom you may remember from his long history of pranking WWE types) got pranked by the folks at Screen Junkies when he ended up walking into his own wedding, officiated by his “bestie” Dwayne Johnson. Apparently, The Rock is an ordained minister in the state of California. Who knew?

It’s funny, emotional and pretty much what you needed to watch this afternoon. For an idea of how real and happy this was, here’s the followup from Mundy’s Twitter:

And I mean seriously, look at this shot. How can you beat this shot?


I wonder if I could get UPROXX to prank me into a wedding officiated by The Undertaker? I’m willing to take a chokeslam through a table, I don’t even care.

23 May 06:31

Pentagon Blew $36M on Unwanted Afghan Outpost

by Tracy Connor
IKEA Monkey

BUT YES, CUTTING BENEFITS TO THE POOR IS WHAT WE NEED TO DO

A government watchdog claims some defense officials also stonewalled their probe into the facility.







22 May 22:33

This NYC Townhouse Is a 'Steal' at $21.5 Million

by Shannan Siemens
IKEA Monkey

OPULENCE, HE HAS IT

Sneak peek inside one of Manhattan's most extravagant residences and why the broker selling says it's a "steal" at $21.5 million.







22 May 16:27

Duggar Son Apologizes After Molestation Allegations

IKEA Monkey

"I'm sorry" is probably not enough?

Josh Duggar, who was featured in "19 Kids and Counting," issued an apology and quit his job on Thursday after reports that he molested underage girls.







22 May 16:04

'Batkid Begins' Trailer Will Make You Cry About Batkid Again

by Bobby Finger
IKEA Monkey

no YOU'RE sobbing on a Friday morning

Remember Batkid? The leukemia patient who made the entire world cry oceans of tears and let out deafening awwwwws after his Make-a-Wish project turned San Francisco into Gotham for a day? His story was turned into a documentary called Batkid Begins, and its trailer has just been released.

Read more...








22 May 15:17

#240 Being single

by nkspas
IKEA Monkey

I'm not single anymore but this was sweet.

We see you, we hear you.

We see those movie endings and we hear those greeting cards. We know the cheesy quotes and we sing those ballads at bars. We feel those preaching choirs and we read those magazine tips. We feel our parents pushing and we hear your chatty lips.

Yes, we know having a boyfriend is great and we know it’s beautiful and kind. But all we’re saying today, and all we’re trying to prove, is that you don’t need a killer girlfriend to have a killer mood.

Let’s chat about ten winning ways to celebrate your solo days:

1. Some like it hot. When you’re on your own you’re the master of the tank and the chances of a random flush scalding your skin is pretty slim. You’re less likely to run out of hot water so just twist that dial and soak into the zone.

2. One set of parents. Sure, you lose out on some inlaw naps but you could gain back holiday budgets, extra bedrooms, and Saturday evenings. Note to any inlaws reading this: This entry is about other inlaws, not you.

3. Take back the night. When you’re bumping around by yourself there’s no need to worry about making too much noise early or late. Tiptoes, quiet TV watching, and softly shutting doors take a backseat to cranking tunes, late-night phone calls, and your big galoomping feet.

4. Don’t be an ass. Single folks have no obligation to do joint Halloween costumes like Beauty and the Beast or the classic two-person donkey. Because don’t we all feel a little bit sorry for that couple dressed as Salt and Pepper shakers leaving the party at 10pm?

5. Flirt like you mean it. Chitchatting with sparkly objects of your desire is good fun. When you’re single ditch the guilt and holler at the busty waitress or chiseled cop. Not only is it exciting, but you’re growing your social skills and constantly meeting new people.

6. Getting to know you. You’re the only you you’ve got. Born and blasted into the world you’re a baby brain who flies through life forming crackly connections with everyone you meet. But getting to know yourself through experiences and deep thoughts adds important shapes and smears to your identity.

7. Bargain basement holidays. Tap your wallet and smile next time you walk by a towering Valentine’s Day display of heart-filled chocolates and pink teddy bears.

8. You can get with this or you can get with that. Are you hungry at 11pm? Get a burger! Are you bored on a Saturday night? Hit the scene! Do you want to free up your busy weekend or busy up your free one? Well the choice is yours! You can get with this or you can get with that. I think you’ll get with this for this is where it’s at.

9. Own your bed, own your life. When you’re single the entire bed is yours and you can test a variety of Starfish poses, Chun-Li leg kick positions, or even the extremely bold diagonal sleeping. (Rarely done.)

10. Embrace your disgusting habits. Clipping your toenails in bed, napping in piles of dirty clothes, or chomping greasy handfuls of potato chips over the sink is fine, fine, fine. The mirror won’t judge you and neither will anybody else.

People, let’s hear it today for being single. Exploring the world, finding adventures, and scoping big scenes are hallmarks of being cool with being you. Because look — falling in love is great and falling in love is nice but that doesn’t mean going alone can’t also be sugar and spice. Good days and bad days, setting suns and shining stars, it’s all about perspective and focusing on who you are. Because if all you need is love, and all love needs is you, then it’s great to relax and enjoy… just being you with you.

AWESOME!

— Tweets —

Photos from: here, here, here, here, and here


22 May 14:32

Hardee’s Most American Burger Is Exactly the Nutritional Disaster You’d Expect

by Sean Kelley
IKEA Monkey

the hot dogs are eyes and the lettuce is the tongue going "blehhhhhh"

Hardee's Most American BurgerSome food wrecks are hard to look away from. Today Hardee’s and Carl’s Jr. began serving their Most American Thickburger, a gargantuan meaty concoction that combines a hotdog, a cheeseburger, potato chips, condiments, lettuce, and tomato all on a fresh-baked bun. The 1/2-pound version (it also comes in 1/3- and 1/4-pound variations) checks in at 1,190 calories, 29g of saturated fat, and a whopping 3,170mg of sodium. As Cooking Light‘s resident fat man, I felt like it was my patriotic duty to test this behemoth so that you don’t have to …

… and now I’m lying in a puddle of fat on the floor of my office dictating this post. I ache. My diabetes aches. My fat aches.

I can’t say that I wasn’t properly warned. In fact, I printed out the nutritional information before I went to my local Hardee’s and shared it with Cooking Light‘s in-house nutritionist Sidney Fry, MS, RD. “You know, Sean, you don’t have to eat it. You certainly don’t have to eat the whole thing.”

Well, I didn’t. Because after eating about 1/3 of the sandwich I was stuffed. After eating 1/2, signals were coming from my gut that I may not be man enough to eat the entire sandwich—and when just 1/4 was left, those signals were confirmed. I stopped.

For the record, I like Hardee’s. In the small Southern town in which I grew up, the Hardee’s was the only breakfast spot, and their steak biscuits apparently failed to stunt my growth.

Their Thickburgers, launched in 2003, are better burger fare than most fast-food restaurants and many specialty burger joints. But their message clearly is about excess, and I need a little less excess. If healthy eating is all about making good choices, the Most American Thickburger is the wrong choice every time.

Make your own homemade hamburger buns

Consider what I could have eaten in its place:

• At least three of these cheddar cheeseburgers with caramelized shallots
• Five of these bacon cheeseburger sliders
• Half of this key lime pie

(And I do love me some key lime pie.)

Of course, none of these decisions are good because the portion sizes are all out of whack, they don’t conform to any health standards, and they lack a diversity of flavors and nutrients that a healthy diet encourages. But let’s just focus on the nutrition angle: In eating this burger, I’ve eaten more than half my daily allowance of calories (2,000) and more than my daily allowance of saturated fat (20g). My sodium intake alone is one and a half times my recommended daily intake (2,300mg).

Spice up your hamburger patties

Ironically, I could have chosen something worse: The Most American Thickburger isn’t the highest calorie burger on Hardee’s menu. That award goes to the 1/2 lb. Thickburger El Diablo, which has 1,380 calories, 32g of saturated fat, and 3,830mg of sodium, and the 2/3 pound Monster Thickburger, which has 1,330 calories, 35g of saturated fat, and 2,820mg sodium. Just think of what that choice will cost you.

Want to check out Hardee’s new burger? Before you go, use their online calculator to determine what you’ll be eating—and ultimately what you’ll be giving up.


22 May 14:05

Congrats, Santa Barbara! You Got Oiled By One Of America’s Slimiest Pipeline Companies!

by Doktor Zoom
IKEA Monkey

This is really awful. Santa Barbara is one of the most beautiful coastlines in California, and its not like California doesn't have enough environmental issues to worry about with the drought. :(

You can still see some sand, so it's not that bad.

You can still see some sand, so it's not that bad.

This post supported by a grant from the Patty Dumpling Endowed Chair for coverage of oil spills, oil industry nastiness, and coastal sliming.

So here’s the good news about Tuesday’s oil spill in Santa Barbara County, California: It’s nothing compared to the 1969 offshore drilling accident that fouled hundreds of square miles of ocean. That one was the third-worst oil spill in U.S. history, while Tuesday’s spill was a mere wet fart of a spill, with only about 105,000 gallons of oil spilled, of which a piddling 21,000 gallons went into the coastal waters. (There, that’s our “minimizing disaster” tryout for the Heartland Institute blogging job. Wish us luck!)

Read more on Congrats, Santa Barbara! You Got Oiled By One Of America’s Slimiest Pipeline Companies!…

22 May 13:57

Review: McDonald's Turkey Sausage & Egg White Breakfast Bowl

by Q
IKEA Monkey

This doesn't look terrible?

McDonald's Turkey Sausage & Egg White Breakfast Bowl features cut-up pieces of turkey sausage and egg whites topped with kale, spinach, bruschetta, and cheddar jack cheese.

I bought one for $3.99. It's one of two bowls being tested here in Southern California.

There's about three to four eggs' worth of egg whites in the folded mass included in the bowl. They were soft and somewhat fluffy.

The turkey sausage was moist and flavorful. Compared to McDonald's regular breakfast sausage, it wasn't as salty nor as heavily seasoned.

There's a good handful of greens on top, considering that they were wilted down. The kale looked to be baby kale as it wasn't as fibrous as matured kale. Both provided a good amount of flavor and plant-life not normally associated with McDonald's breakfast. If the bowls don't make it out of test, it might be a good idea to keep the greens as an additional option on their Egg McMuffins.

The bruschetta seemed indistinguishable from the pico de gallo of the Chorizo Bowl. Both offered mostly tangy tomato notes and not much else.

The cheddar jack cheese was very nicely melted but with a very mild flavor that pretty much amounted to vague creaminess.

Overall, I enjoyed McDonald's Turkey Sausage & Egg White Breakfast Bowl for its main components. The greens were also very good but the cheese and bruschetta could use some work. I could see the draw of this for people looking for something healthier and quick at McDonald's for breakfast.
Read more at Brand Eating!
22 May 07:40

John Travolta Can't Help But Wonder in Cast Photos for People vs. OJ

by Clover Hope
IKEA Monkey

Why does John Travolta look like Arnold Schwarzenegger?

Behold the official cast photos for American Crime Story: People vs. O.J., the TV movie that we have to wait till 2016 to watch.

Read more...








22 May 02:37

53 People in 9 States Sickened After Eating Raw Tuna

The source of the outbreak is unknown, but most who fell ill reported eating sushi containing raw tuna.







22 May 00:29

Hundreds of NK spies in U.S.?

IKEA Monkey

Its gotta be so awkward for those spies to get all hyped up and come over here and realize that by and large, most Americans don't give two toots about North Korea.

I wonder, honestly, how many of them go back and report false things about how America is ramping up for war!! How America is marching and demonstrating about an inevitable attack! Just because that is what N Korea's cultural and political narrative is, and what the Kims' power is based on - the fear that America is going to attack at any minute and the zealotry that keeps them armed to the teeth and under the Kims' thumb.

Looking at the poison pens and torch guns, you would be forgiven for thinking you were on a James Bond set. But these weapons are real and are still part of the arsenal of North Korean spies.
21 May 23:54

Woman Murdered After Escaping Captor Who Kept Her In a Box For Months

by Bobby Finger
IKEA Monkey

Fucking awful. How the fuck did he "go missing", especially when he was also once charged and convicted for kidnapping and raping another woman, and only served 4 years?

Earlier this month, Sandra Kay Sutton escaped the Sedalia, Missouri, home of ex-boyfriend James B. Horn after being held captive in a wooden box for four months. Though Horn was quickly charged with “kidnapping, armed criminal action, and unlawful use of a weapon,” he went missing soon after. Today KMBC is reporting the terrible news that Sutton and her 17-year-old son Zachary were found in their family’s home, “dead from gunshot wounds.”

Read more...








21 May 23:50

Chicago's Population Grew Last Year—By 82

by Jim Bochnowski
Chicago's Population Grew Last Year—By 82 Chicago has retained its position as the third-largest city in America, but somehow its population only grew by 82—yes, 82 individual people—last year. [ more › ]






21 May 23:23

Girl Scouts welcome transgender girls

IKEA Monkey

Girl Scouts have always been progressive as hell. I am a proud former Girl Scout!

Transgender girls are welcome in the Girl Scouts of the United States of America, a stance that has attracted controversy from some conservative groups over the past week.
21 May 23:16

Chef Creates Meals Inspired By Heavy Metal Bands

by Chris Durso
slayerpizza

The Slayer Pizza, photo: Chef John Hurkes

Food can be so metal… except vegetables, which are more like slow jazz. Anyways, chef John Hurkes regularly contributes Heavy Metal-Inspired Meals to Rice and Bread Magazine.

Slayer Pizza, Nuclear Assault Nachos, and the Exodus Pork Belly Blood Feast are just a few of the metal meals that’ll make you hungry and head-bangy.

Check out more here, and then get cooking. Horns up, forks out.

perfect-pairings-sabbath-pizza-hurkes

The Black Sabbath Pizza, photo: Chef John Hurkes

Perfect-Pairings-Nuclear-Nachos-Chef-John-Hurkes

Nuclear Assault Nachos, photo: Chef John Hurkes

Hurkes-Juicy-Lucifuge

The Juicy Lucifuge, photo: Chef John Hurkes

Exodus-Perfect-Pairings-

The Blood Feast, photo: Chef John Hurkes

 

[link, via The Awesomer]