IKEA Monkey

More than 700 people have lost their lives in the past week in a sustained and severe heatwave in India.

A senior prank in which 72,000 ladybugs were released in a public high school has several youths and adults facing criminal charges.

This year may be a bad one for Lyme and other tick-borne diseases. One group of parasitologists is predicting “higher than usual threat” in areas where Lyme is already common, and the disease continues to gain territory every year (as the CDC maps above show).

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A kangaroo with unusually large muscles has recently taken up residence in a Brisbane suburb, prompting locals to ask, “Who’s this new stud in town?” The kangaroo is like, “Bro, do you even lift?” Resident Linda Hellyar almost ran into the animal when she was out walking her dogs one day. “He’s very intimidating. He’s a big boy,” she said. “He’s got massive, massive muscles, big pecs and everything.”

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Add an extra punch of flavor to dishes by grinding up tasty Doritos or Cheetos. Doritos dusted popcorn is so much better than regular popcorn.

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There are a lot of things that, much to my embarrassment, I have only learned recently. One thing is that the word “segue” is not “segway.” The other is when to take ibuprofen and when to take acetaminophen. The former is a perfectly acceptable thing to eventually discover; the other is a massive failure of civilization.

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Doing the dishes is a simple chore, but for some reason, nobody ever wants to do them. By making it a competition with something at stake, everyone in the household might want to make an effort.

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Martini’s are a sophisticated drink, but they can be daunting if you don’t know the ingredients or lingo. This infographic explains everything you need to know about ordering and making one the most iconic cocktails there is.

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When you use a recipe that calls for mozzarella, you sometimes get stuck with a bunch of leftover bits that may not seem too useful. A quick bath in boiling water, however, can help bring all those bits back into a single ball of mozzarella again.

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McDonald's Chorizo Breakfast Bowl features chorizo and egg on a hash brown with shredded cheddar jack cheese and pico de gallo on top.

I paid $3.99 for one and it included salsa on the side (labelled "Mexican salsa" for whatever reason). It came in a fairly small-looking container but was pretty filling and had a decent heft to it.

Interestingly, rather than a scrambled mixture of chorizo and egg, they combined the two into somewhat of a breakfast meatloaf. It has a moist combo of fluffy egg binding together bits of chorizo sausage.

Flavor-wise, the egg doesn't really figure in but they hit the right seasoning for the chorizo; there isn't any heat to it, though, if you were hoping for the spicy variety.

The hash brown lost much of its crunch sitting at the very bottom. The potato paired well with the chorizo-loaf but the hash brown would have definitely been better on top (I guess they put it on the bottom for aesthetic reasons).

The pico de gallo added some tartness but not much flavor on the onion or cilantro front. It was also fairly mushy, but that's usually the case at most establishments.

The cheese was the typical overly mild stuff common in Fast Food Land; it offered the standard gooey but bland creamy factor.

Overall, I really like McDonald's Chorizo Breakfast Bowl. The meatloaf texture might be hit or miss for some but I thought it was interesting and the taste was spot-on. The other components, while middling, complimented the chorizo well with just enough variety.

Cry-Baby #1: Stephen Woodhouse

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Stephen Woodhouse. Screencaps via ITV and Google Maps

The incident: A man's neighbor's dog wouldn't stop barking.

The appropriate response: Resolving the issue with the neighbors or the local authorities, depending on the circumstances.

The actual response: He drowned and later mutilated the dog.

Stephen Woodhouse, a 52-year-old pilot from the village of Long Buckby, England, was mowing his lawn last July, when he grew annoyed by the barking of his neighbor's dog.

Stephen had reportedly had issues with the dog, a border terrier named Meg, in the past, which he claimed he could hear barking from "morning until night."

He leaned over the fence, picked up the dog, and carried her to an area of his property where construction work was being done.

"There was some building work being done and a big bucket of water," Stephen later told police. "So I stuck it in the bucket until it stopped moving. I never thought of the consequences."

Once the dog was dead, Stephen hid her body under a hedge.

Worried that the dog might be tracked by the microchip in her neck, Stephen returned to the body that night and used a knife to cut the chip out.

When the dog's owners, Alan and Alison Boddington, realized that the dog was missing, they launched a village-wide search operation. They were especially keen to find the dog because they had bought it as a companion for their disabled daughter, who died last year of an asthma attack at the age of ten. Dozens of neighbors and friends joined in the search.

Eventually, Alison, the dog's owner, grew suspicious that Stephen might have been involved, and searched his car. After finding dog hair and a rope, she called police.

Stephen reportedly told police, "I reached my wits' end. All I could think of was that the noise had to stop. It was driving me bloody mad."

After pleading guilty, he was spared jail, but had to pay £3,200 ($5,000) in fines.

Stephen has also reportedly been suspended from his job as a pilot pending an investigation to determine whether he is mentally fit to fly.

One of the villagers who talked to the Daily Mail said, "He hated pets and kids. Nobody likes him... In the entirety of the old village you couldn't find anyone that would say a good word about him."

Presumably this incident hasn't done a great deal to help his image.

Cry-Baby #2: Elizabeth Hogrefe

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Screencap via Google Maps

The incident: A woman's boyfriend was snoring.

The appropriate response: Nudging him, then buying him anti-snoring products, then, if that does nothing and it bothers you enough, breaking up with him.

The actual response: She allegedly beat him with a crowbar.

Last week, Elizabeth Hogrefe (pictured above) was staying at a motel in Lincoln, Nebraska, with her unnamed 58-year-old boyfriend.

During the night, the boyfriend allegedly awoke to find Elizabeth yelling at him while beating him with a crowbar.

According to police, the boyfriend fled the room and staggered down the road. A motorist who saw the injured man reportedly called the police.

When police found the man at a nearby convenience store, they say they found three large welts on his back that were "consistent with being hit with a pry bar."

A spokesperson for the Lincoln Police Department told the Lincoln Journal Star that Elizabeth had attacked the sleeping man because he was snoring.

Elizabeth was arrested and charged with misdemeanor domestic assault. She is currently in jail awaiting trial—hopefully not in a cell with a snorer.

Which one of these noise-haters is the bigger cry-baby? Let us know in this poll down here:

Previously: A woman who got a man arrested after he smashed her car window to save her dog vs. a guy who allegedly shot a dog because it "made a mess".

Winner: The guy who shot a dog :(

Follow Jamie Lee Curtis Taete on Twitter.

Dozens of girls being raised without fathers weren't left out when the Chicago Police Department held it's first-ever "Daddy Daughter Dance."

Ireland has become the first country to legalize same-sex marriage through popular vote. FULL STORY

A bizarre slow-speed chase ended peacefully when a man stepped into traffic and in front of the car and stopped it, forcing the driver to surrender.

You’ve seen The Rock do a lot in his acting and pro wrestling careers, but have you ever seen him officiate a surprise wedding?

Comedian Nick Mundy (whom you may remember from his long history of pranking WWE types) got pranked by the folks at Screen Junkies when he ended up walking into his own wedding, officiated by his “bestie” Dwayne Johnson. Apparently, The Rock is an ordained minister in the state of California. Who knew?

It’s funny, emotional and pretty much what you needed to watch this afternoon. For an idea of how real and happy this was, here’s the followup from Mundy’s Twitter:

And I mean seriously, look at this shot. How can you beat this shot?

I wonder if I could get UPROXX to prank me into a wedding officiated by The Undertaker? I’m willing to take a chokeslam through a table, I don’t even care.

A government watchdog claims some defense officials also stonewalled their probe into the facility.

Sneak peek inside one of Manhattan's most extravagant residences and why the broker selling says it's a "steal" at $21.5 million.

Josh Duggar, who was featured in "19 Kids and Counting," issued an apology and quit his job on Thursday after reports that he molested underage girls.

Remember Batkid? The leukemia patient who made the entire world cry oceans of tears and let out deafening awwwwws after his Make-a-Wish project turned San Francisco into Gotham for a day? His story was turned into a documentary called Batkid Begins, and its trailer has just been released.

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We see you, we hear you.

We see those movie endings and we hear those greeting cards. We know the cheesy quotes and we sing those ballads at bars. We feel those preaching choirs and we read those magazine tips. We feel our parents pushing and we hear your chatty lips.

Yes, we know having a boyfriend is great and we know it’s beautiful and kind. But all we’re saying today, and all we’re trying to prove, is that you don’t need a killer girlfriend to have a killer mood.

Let’s chat about ten winning ways to celebrate your solo days:

1. Some like it hot. When you’re on your own you’re the master of the tank and the chances of a random flush scalding your skin is pretty slim. You’re less likely to run out of hot water so just twist that dial and soak into the zone.

2. One set of parents. Sure, you lose out on some inlaw naps but you could gain back holiday budgets, extra bedrooms, and Saturday evenings. Note to any inlaws reading this: This entry is about other inlaws, not you.

3. Take back the night. When you’re bumping around by yourself there’s no need to worry about making too much noise early or late. Tiptoes, quiet TV watching, and softly shutting doors take a backseat to cranking tunes, late-night phone calls, and your big galoomping feet.

4. Don’t be an ass. Single folks have no obligation to do joint Halloween costumes like Beauty and the Beast or the classic two-person donkey. Because don’t we all feel a little bit sorry for that couple dressed as Salt and Pepper shakers leaving the party at 10pm?

5. Flirt like you mean it. Chitchatting with sparkly objects of your desire is good fun. When you’re single ditch the guilt and holler at the busty waitress or chiseled cop. Not only is it exciting, but you’re growing your social skills and constantly meeting new people.

6. Getting to know you. You’re the only you you’ve got. Born and blasted into the world you’re a baby brain who flies through life forming crackly connections with everyone you meet. But getting to know yourself through experiences and deep thoughts adds important shapes and smears to your identity.

7. Bargain basement holidays. Tap your wallet and smile next time you walk by a towering Valentine’s Day display of heart-filled chocolates and pink teddy bears.

8. You can get with this or you can get with that. Are you hungry at 11pm? Get a burger! Are you bored on a Saturday night? Hit the scene! Do you want to free up your busy weekend or busy up your free one? Well the choice is yours! You can get with this or you can get with that. I think you’ll get with this for this is where it’s at.

9. Own your bed, own your life. When you’re single the entire bed is yours and you can test a variety of Starfish poses, Chun-Li leg kick positions, or even the extremely bold diagonal sleeping. (Rarely done.)

10. Embrace your disgusting habits. Clipping your toenails in bed, napping in piles of dirty clothes, or chomping greasy handfuls of potato chips over the sink is fine, fine, fine. The mirror won’t judge you and neither will anybody else.

People, let’s hear it today for being single. Exploring the world, finding adventures, and scoping big scenes are hallmarks of being cool with being you. Because look — falling in love is great and falling in love is nice but that doesn’t mean going alone can’t also be sugar and spice. Good days and bad days, setting suns and shining stars, it’s all about perspective and focusing on who you are. Because if all you need is love, and all love needs is you, then it’s great to relax and enjoy… just being you with you.

AWESOME!

— Tweets —

Photos from: here, here, here, here, and here

Some food wrecks are hard to look away from. Today Hardee’s and Carl’s Jr. began serving their Most American Thickburger, a gargantuan meaty concoction that combines a hotdog, a cheeseburger, potato chips, condiments, lettuce, and tomato all on a fresh-baked bun. The 1/2-pound version (it also comes in 1/3- and 1/4-pound variations) checks in at 1,190 calories, 29g of saturated fat, and a whopping 3,170mg of sodium. As Cooking Light‘s resident fat man, I felt like it was my patriotic duty to test this behemoth so that you don’t have to …

… and now I’m lying in a puddle of fat on the floor of my office dictating this post. I ache. My diabetes aches. My fat aches.

I can’t say that I wasn’t properly warned. In fact, I printed out the nutritional information before I went to my local Hardee’s and shared it with Cooking Light‘s in-house nutritionist Sidney Fry, MS, RD. “You know, Sean, you don’t have to eat it. You certainly don’t have to eat the whole thing.”

Well, I didn’t. Because after eating about 1/3 of the sandwich I was stuffed. After eating 1/2, signals were coming from my gut that I may not be man enough to eat the entire sandwich—and when just 1/4 was left, those signals were confirmed. I stopped.

For the record, I like Hardee’s. In the small Southern town in which I grew up, the Hardee’s was the only breakfast spot, and their steak biscuits apparently failed to stunt my growth.

Their Thickburgers, launched in 2003, are better burger fare than most fast-food restaurants and many specialty burger joints. But their message clearly is about excess, and I need a little less excess. If healthy eating is all about making good choices, the Most American Thickburger is the wrong choice every time.

Make your own homemade hamburger buns

Consider what I could have eaten in its place:

• At least three of these cheddar cheeseburgers with caramelized shallots
• Five of these bacon cheeseburger sliders
• Half of this key lime pie

(And I do love me some key lime pie.)

Of course, none of these decisions are good because the portion sizes are all out of whack, they don’t conform to any health standards, and they lack a diversity of flavors and nutrients that a healthy diet encourages. But let’s just focus on the nutrition angle: In eating this burger, I’ve eaten more than half my daily allowance of calories (2,000) and more than my daily allowance of saturated fat (20g). My sodium intake alone is one and a half times my recommended daily intake (2,300mg).

Spice up your hamburger patties

Ironically, I could have chosen something worse: The Most American Thickburger isn’t the highest calorie burger on Hardee’s menu. That award goes to the 1/2 lb. Thickburger El Diablo, which has 1,380 calories, 32g of saturated fat, and 3,830mg of sodium, and the 2/3 pound Monster Thickburger, which has 1,330 calories, 35g of saturated fat, and 2,820mg sodium. Just think of what that choice will cost you.

Want to check out Hardee’s new burger? Before you go, use their online calculator to determine what you’ll be eating—and ultimately what you’ll be giving up.

This post supported by a grant from the Patty Dumpling Endowed Chair for coverage of oil spills, oil industry nastiness, and coastal sliming.

So here’s the good news about Tuesday’s oil spill in Santa Barbara County, California: It’s nothing compared to the 1969 offshore drilling accident that fouled hundreds of square miles of ocean. That one was the third-worst oil spill in U.S. history, while Tuesday’s spill was a mere wet fart of a spill, with only about 105,000 gallons of oil spilled, of which a piddling 21,000 gallons went into the coastal waters. (There, that’s our “minimizing disaster” tryout for the Heartland Institute blogging job. Wish us luck!)

Read more on Congrats, Santa Barbara! You Got Oiled By One Of America’s Slimiest Pipeline Companies!…

McDonald's Turkey Sausage & Egg White Breakfast Bowl features cut-up pieces of turkey sausage and egg whites topped with kale, spinach, bruschetta, and cheddar jack cheese.

I bought one for $3.99. It's one of two bowls being tested here in Southern California.

There's about three to four eggs' worth of egg whites in the folded mass included in the bowl. They were soft and somewhat fluffy.

The turkey sausage was moist and flavorful. Compared to McDonald's regular breakfast sausage, it wasn't as salty nor as heavily seasoned.

There's a good handful of greens on top, considering that they were wilted down. The kale looked to be baby kale as it wasn't as fibrous as matured kale. Both provided a good amount of flavor and plant-life not normally associated with McDonald's breakfast. If the bowls don't make it out of test, it might be a good idea to keep the greens as an additional option on their Egg McMuffins.

The bruschetta seemed indistinguishable from the pico de gallo of the Chorizo Bowl. Both offered mostly tangy tomato notes and not much else.

The cheddar jack cheese was very nicely melted but with a very mild flavor that pretty much amounted to vague creaminess.

Overall, I enjoyed McDonald's Turkey Sausage & Egg White Breakfast Bowl for its main components. The greens were also very good but the cheese and bruschetta could use some work. I could see the draw of this for people looking for something healthier and quick at McDonald's for breakfast.

Behold the official cast photos for American Crime Story: People vs. O.J., the TV movie that we have to wait till 2016 to watch.

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The source of the outbreak is unknown, but most who fell ill reported eating sushi containing raw tuna.

Looking at the poison pens and torch guns, you would be forgiven for thinking you were on a James Bond set. But these weapons are real and are still part of the arsenal of North Korean spies.

Earlier this month, Sandra Kay Sutton escaped the Sedalia, Missouri, home of ex-boyfriend James B. Horn after being held captive in a wooden box for four months. Though Horn was quickly charged with “kidnapping, armed criminal action, and unlawful use of a weapon,” he went missing soon after. Today KMBC is reporting the terrible news that Sutton and her 17-year-old son Zachary were found in their family’s home, “dead from gunshot wounds.”

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Chicago has retained its position as the third-largest city in America, but somehow its population only grew by 82—yes, 82 individual people—last year. [ more › ]

Transgender girls are welcome in the Girl Scouts of the United States of America, a stance that has attracted controversy from some conservative groups over the past week.

Food can be so metal… except vegetables, which are more like slow jazz. Anyways, chef John Hurkes regularly contributes Heavy Metal-Inspired Meals to Rice and Bread Magazine.

Slayer Pizza, Nuclear Assault Nachos, and the Exodus Pork Belly Blood Feast are just a few of the metal meals that’ll make you hungry and head-bangy.

Check out more here, and then get cooking. Horns up, forks out.

 

[link, via The Awesomer]