IKEA Monkey

Illinois taxpayers can expect to wait longer for refunds this year, with the state revenue department saying it will take longer to process paperwork in an effort to prevent fraud and identity theft.

The agency said Monday that it doesn't plan to release any refund payments through March 1. After...

Once again, I tried a whole lot of new fast food menu items this year. Here are my top ten picks for 2015 of fast food items that brought something new and interesting to the table and were also great to eat:

- Jack in the Box's Cheddar Onion Buttery Jack - The Buttery Jack line introduced was top notch all around, but I particularly liked the Cheddar Onion for a triple dose of onions in crispy, grilled, and sauce form. The Black Pepper Cheeseburger deserves a mention for offering something similar but more run-of-the-mill.

- Starbucks' Holiday Flat White - Most holiday drinks are quite sweet but the new Holiday Flat White managed to keep it light while offering a mix of holiday spices.

- Burger King's Buffalo Chicken Fries - These weren't amazing but they were still enjoyable and delivered a mess-free Buffalo wing profile while coming in a hilariously cute box.

- Popeyes' Wild Pepper Tenderloins - The uniquely numbing Szechuan heat made me pick this one over Popeyes' also excellent Smoky Garlic Chile Chicken.

- McDonald's Oreo Frappe - There are a lot of Oreo shakes out there but this one managed to capture that vanilla creme flavor to go with the addition of coffee.

- Carl's Jr.'s / Hardee's Grilled Pork Chop Biscuit - A juicy, tender slice of pork loin on a buttermilk biscuit? Yes, please!

- Pizza Hut's Hot Dog Bites Pizza - This one made me wished Pizza Hut offered the Bites alone so that I could get fresh-baked pigs in a blanket with a quick phone call.

- Arby's Garlic Parmesan Housemade Chips - The garlic parmesan flavor was great and no other major fast food chain is offering fresh-fried potato chips.

- Wendy's Jalapeno Fresco Spicy Chicken Sandwich - The fresh jalapenos, wholly uncommon in fast food, and the spicy components throughout made this a nice draw for heat seekers.

- Popeyes' Blueberry 'n Lemon Cream Cheese Pie - The lemon and blueberry combo just worked, and putting it inside a crispy fried turnover pie crust was just icing on the cake (or maybe it should be "whipped cream on the pie").

Judd Apatow is always writing for or producing TV series created by other people — Girls, The Simpsons — but it’s been a while since he’s actually worked on a series of his own. Well, that time is now, as Entertainment Weekly has revealed that his new Netflix comedy, Love, will be released, all at once, on February 19. 

Love, which Apatow co-wrote with star Paul Rust (Comedy Bang! Bang!, Inglorious Basterds), is a 10-episode series that focuses on a couple played by Gillian Jacobs (Community, Life Partners) and Rust. Rust is the nice guy who has just gone through a breakup, and Jacobs is the crazy girl who hates her job. Oh, she’s also, by coincidence, experienced a breakup, so, you know. They get together, or talk about getting together, and she’s crazy and he’s funny and cute and they’re both neurotic!

Netflix has released a pretty tame teaser, which you can find below. It’s perhaps the most tease-y teaser ever, as it says almost nothing about the show. But still, watch it! And then watch the show, because it’s already secured a two-season deal.

Katrina Pierson, a person Donald Trumps chooses to represent him on television, wore a necklace made out of ammunition last night on CNN. When someone on Twitter pointed this out, she countered with an insane remark about abortion.

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Americans are mad as hell, a new poll finds, and no one describes themselves as angrier than white female Republicans, especially ones approaching retirement age. An NBC News/Survey Monkey/Esquire poll found that 49 percent of Americans are angrier now than a year ago, including 54 percent of white people.

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Police in Germany say a man died after he and two others blew up a condom machine and he was hit in the head by a flying piece of metal.Officers were alerted to the explosion Dec. 25 in Schoeppingen, near the Dutch border, and found cash and condom packets lying on the ground apparently untouched.A...

Photo gallery: Newsmakers and celebrities who died in 2016.

A wild bear sleeping up in a tree has been treated like an honored guest in Summit, New Jersey.

An employee of a Mexican resort where Ethan and Tonya Couch hid from justice this month tells the Dallas Morning News that while the pair were staying there, the “affluenza” teen went to a strip club, spent more money than he had, and had his mother bail him out.

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   She loves a cape. And she LOVES a big hat. And yet somehow she shakes up the rest enough — even while cleaving to her signature colors! — that I’m completely fine with this pattern AND hope she keeps both in her arsenal. Because she does them SO WELL. Read More ...

Welcome to Midweek Madness, where we—oh motherfucker. Damn it. Damn it, damn it, damn it. Blake Shelton impregnated Gwen Stefani. This is miserable news. Absolutely miserable. Hurry the hell up, 2016, because a Gwake Baby just made 2015 boil over.

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The Address hotel in downtown Dubai is currently on fire, coinciding with the emirate’s New Year’s Eve fireworks display.

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“The area around the North Pole was about as warm as Chicago on Wednesday, and quite a few degrees warmer than much of the Midwest.” Everything is going to be just fine.

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According to user data from a San Francisco-based startup, we barely notice snow unless we get more than 8 inches. [ more › ]

There’s not much to say about Aretha Franklin’s jaw- and fur-dropping performance of “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman” last night during the Kennedy Center Honors that can’t be better described by the reactions from audience members like Barack and Michelle Obama, Viola Davis, Gina Rodriguez, Kerry Washington, and honoree/songwriter Carole King.

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Ethan Couch, the teen whose “affluenza” affliction kept him out of jail after killing four in a drunk driving incident, was apprehended in Mexico early this week. Couch and his mother, Tonya, had been on the lam for weeks, evading authorities after the teen violated the terms his probation. It turns out that the Couches were caught because they couldn’t resist the sweet intoxicating taste of Domino’s Pizza.

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John Cena on TODAY is my favorite version of John Cena. The Cena that grants wishes and is super nice to small children is alright. The unbeatable John Cena who shows up to call people b*tches…eh, not so much. He’s won championships and was great in Sisters and is probably the second-best significant other on Total Divas (love you, weird and possibly-a-robot Jonathan!), but none of that feels as right as when John Cena steps on the set of TODAY. I mean sure, watching two morning-drunk ladies all but climb him like a jungle gym is a special experience regardless of what show it’s happening on, but there’s something fascinating about how easily he slips into the role of a guy just happy to be here taking down Christmas decorations and making stay at home parents turn into a modern day horned-up Blanche Devereaux.

Now Cena’s one-upped himself. There isn’t a glass of wine in sight, but there’s a bevy of tiny baby animals and oops I think I just passed out with happiness for a second. This truly is the clip that keeps on giving. Watch as regular co-host Natalie Morales gets totally weird about everything. She doesn’t like sting rays! She gets excited that there’s an animal who practices monogamy (who hurt you, girl?)! Animal (and possible methamphetamine) enthusiast Corbin Maxey bounces around, foisting tiny animal after tiny animal on the two. After being presented with both a tiny tortoise and a rabbit, John Cena decides to make them race and Corbin f*cking LOSES IT:

Same, dude. Same.

Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Onward.

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Over the past 15 months, beleaguered Pennsylvania Attorney General Kathleen Kane has released a steady stream of messages retrieved from a state email server that show state officials and employees trading pornographic, racist and misogynistic messages.

There are jokes about rape and sexual assault,...

Affluenza teen Ethan Couch—who was recently detained in beautiful, sunny Puerto Vallarta—is apparently beleaguered by not just his wealth, but a terrible new dye job as well. We’d know those wispy face hairs anywhere, kid.

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You probably check your Uber and Lyft drivers’ ratings before you hop in their car, but those drivers pay attention to your rating as well. And a bad rating can make grabbing a ride a lot harder in the future. To keep your passenger rating as high as possible, you need to know what drivers look for in passengers, too.

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First, some apologies.

We’re sorry, Endurance Wrapper. You spent thirty minutes getting the present just right with your scissor-frilled ribbons, crisply folded corners, and those adorable little bows. You put time in and we didn’t respect that with your raccoon-with-rabies slaughtering of your gift.

We’re sorry, Auntie Paper Collector. We know you quietly keep all the discarded bows and paper to fold back into little piles for next year. Nobody minds the creased sun-faded reindeer wrapping paper because we know you’re saving money and the planet. But this time we didn’t leave you with much. Unless you’re collecting saliva-smeared scraps, squashed boxes, and torn bows.

We’re sorry, Garbage Collecting Dad. We see you trudging around the living room with the World’s Lightest Garbage Bag, scooping up all the tiny bits of tissue paper and sticky ripped price tags. We know your job would be a lot easier if all presents moved to a Gift Bag Only Policy.

We are very, very sorry to you all.

And now that we’ve apologized our conscience is clear.

Because the truth is we love ripping presents open like a drugged-up reindeer.

AWESOME!

Thank you for making The Book of Awesome #1 on the bestseller list for over five years!

Photos from: here and here

The post #84 Ripping your present open like a wild animal appeared first on 1000 Awesome Things.

Some may know pro wrestler Tonga Fifita as WWF’s (sometimes King) Haku, others may know him as the delightfully terrifying Meng from WCW. To Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson, however, he’s just Uncle Tonga: a guy his grandfather helped train, and someone who had a very important hand in setting Johnson on his path to becoming one of the most well-known and successful pro wrestlers of all-time. This Christmas, Johnson showed his appreciation by giving him a very special gift:

Johnson took to Instagram to explain just how much a simple pair of trunks from his uncle changed his life forever:

…I get a call from WWE saying “Vince McMahon wants to see you wrestle immediately. He’s flying you to RAW tomorrow and you’ll have a tryout match.” I thought holy shit that’s awesome, buuuut there’s a few problems: For me, I wasn’t just having “a tryout match”, because I had never actually HAD a real match in my life. Ever. WWE thought that I already had multiple matches under my belt, but little did they know. What they also didn’t know was that I was broke as hell and didn’t actually own wrestling gear – no boots, knee pads or most importantly.. wrestling trunks.

I went to Sports Authority and bought some bright ass white volleyball knee pads, called my Uncle and asked if he had ANY trunks I could use for my tryout. He said all I have is a pair of shiny purple trunks (purple was his signature color), I told him I don’t care if the trunks are all the colors of Skittles, I’ll happily wear them. When I picked the trunks up from him I’ll never forget the monster hug he gave me, look me in the eyes and said, “I’m so proud of you. Go get ’em nephew!”

Johnson gave his cousin, WWE Diva Tamina, a new car back in 2013, so this is just a thing he does for his family members. Though, realistically, if I were exorbitantly wealthy, I would probably shower Meng with expensive gifts just for being Meng. But, you know, all of the nice stuff he did for The Rock also seems like a pretty decent reason, I guess.

Japan’s sushi industry is notoriously male-dominated, but a group of intrepid female chefs have begun to combat the sexism preventing women from working in the field. In Tokyo’s Akihabara district you’ll now find a restaurant called Nadeshiko Sushi — and every single employee is female.

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It’s bad enough that a Massachusetts family’s Target-purchased Christmas console wound up being a piece of wood in a PlayStation 4 box, but did whoever swapped it out have to draw a dick and balls on it?

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