Bill Hanstock

gameofthronesdaily:

Joffrey Baratheon, costume appreciation.

arabellesicardi:

i deserve this shirt

WHEN YOU FELL FROM HEAVEN

a reminder! i will be at PAX this weekend in bandland, and all the details on my appearances and panels are in this handy post.

Spider-Buck, Spider-Buck, poses just like Spider-Woman does

This is a quick parody painting of that recent Spider-Woman variant cover by Milo Manara, complete with painted on spandex uniform!! 

This is very good work for a parody. 

Little known fact: Mandatory sexiness is part of Hydra training.

How much would a Bartolo Colón of saffron cost?

http://flipflopflyin.com/flipflopflyball/info-saffron.html

About a month ago, all I could tell you about Twin Peaks is that it had something to do with a murder in a small town, and it was pretty much a David Lynch fever dream made into a television series.  But then my Netflix queue got low enough to remind me that Twin Peaks had been on my list of shows to watch for quite a while, and it’s about time I just go ahead, pour myself a hot cup of coffee, enjoy a slice of pie, and figure out who killed Laura Palmer.

And I’m damn glad I did.  Twin Peaks is such a bizarre show, but surprisingly fun.  I guess it’s sort of like the Muppets in that regard, though I didn’t really make that connection until I saw artist Justin Lawrence DeVine’s Twin Peaks/Muppets mash-ups.  Kermit really is like the cool-headed Agent Cooper.  Miss Piggy really is like the complicated, mysterious Laura Palmer.  Animal really is like the dangerous id of Bob.  And so on and so on.

We reached out to DeVine for permission to re-post his excellent work, and we’re so glad he agreed.  There are 11 pieces in the series, but Justin says he may revisit it, if only to round out the dozen. So this may not be the last we see of Justin DeVine or the strange world of Twin Peaks.

You can find more of Justin Lawrence DeVine’s work on his Tumblr page.

And just because it exists, here’s Sesame Street‘s Twin Peaks spoof, “Twin Beaks”:

Many thanks to Justin DeVine for allowing us to re-post his work!

Click here to fire walk with me over the the ToughPigs forum!

by Joe Hennes – Joe@ToughPigs.com

keidmf:

Come back home~

Good afternoon. What the hell am I looking at?

Grant's on vacation, because he's off making professional blogger money now and has "a family" and "the unknowable joy of fathering children" or whatever, so you're stuck with me. I'm very sorry.

At any rate, since Bryan is on the recap/naming home runs/being flooded beat, it's up to me to find something dumb to write about. (McCovey Chronicles: Something Dumb. There's your new header.) Unfortunately for me and for all of you reading this, I found the dumbest thing of all time. I don't even remember how this happened. All I know is that one minute I was on YouTube and had known happiness, and the next minute I was watching this and finally comprehending what Camus what talking about.

The YouTube description of this video is as follows:

Tate Moore with her imaginary family.

I don't know who that is. A google search for "Tate Moore" results in more hits for "Moore Tate," which is generally my request at the starch counter of a Hometown Buffet. So I took a gamble and searched "Tate Moore IMDB" which was also no help. This is clearly (once you get a full minute into the FIVE-MINUTE commercial) an ad for MLB's "At The Ballpark" app, but Giants-themed and made to look like an exceedingly terrible parody of Modern Family. In the year 2014. When everyone except the Emmys and Golden Globes has been sick of Modern Family for three years. It features Surly Older Daughter giving a quick smile and then covering it up when she finds out Timmy is pitching:

Because Tim Lincecum is CATNIP FOR TEEN LADIES. It also figures this kid saying, "Dat swag doe," in what is possibly the whitest thing that has ever happened, ever.

That kid's "dat swag doe" line is followed by him screaming OH COOL AN AUTOGRAPHED [100% unintelligible after 10 listenings] SIGN, and then this happens:

BUHHHHHHHH

And most disingenuous line-reading GOES TO:

"I'm not easily impressed, but the 'My Journal' feature of the At The Ballpark app? Is pretty cool. With it, I can document every gameday experience relive highlights, and most importantly? Tell the story how I want to tell it."

"Hey, could we get another take, Quasi-Surly Teen? Try to act like you're a human being that's spoken words before and try to read less obviously."

*gets exact same delivery*

"Okay I guess we're moving on, then."

So what IS the story the way she wants to tell it?

"HASHTAG GROSS"

"HASHTAG FAIL"

haha okay I kinda like Quasi-Surly Teen.

Or I did, until she wrote a half-assed song about how Timmy is a "HASHTAG HOTTIE."

One thing you have to hand it to this weird, interminably long commercial: they depicted an accurate cross-section of Giants fans.

"I just wanna enjoy the beauty of the BAY." LOL yep they've got our number all right. We can't figure out the best place to catch a home run. Luckily, we have THIS guy to tell us:

Turns out the best place to catch a home run is in the bleachers! You know; THE PLACE WHERE HOME RUNS LAND.

But this commercial has an important, guitar-strummy moral: creating memories at the ballpark is the most "wizard" thing of all. Thanks, commercial that encourages us to spend the entire game looking at our phones!

In conclusion:

everybody i have an announcement: i’m sick of worrying about money. we got a kid on the way, the same old process isn’t gonna cut it. patreon, kickstarters — the new models will only take you so far. time to get rich now

PRESS RELEASE – World-Renowned Author Kris Straub Reveals New Erotic Blockbuster

Get ready for “Sex” with Kris Straub’s “The Wildstreak Chronicles: Meeting Geoffrey Sex”

When Bellissima Wildstreak, cub reporter for New York’s most prestigious finance magazine MoneyBoys, gets an opportunity to interview corporate wunderkind Geoffrey Sex, she pounces on the opportunity. But Sex turns out to be more than just a handsome, charming billionaire — he also introduces the meek-but-willing Wildstreak to the secret underground world of erotic trashplay.

Straub turns the horniness level up to 11 million in his star-making foray into the genre. “I wanted to basically rip off Fifty Shades of Grey,” said Straub in an exclusive interview for his own press release. “They just announced a movie and it looks dumb as shit. I can’t believe people eat this stuff up. It’s just porn that pretends to be sophisticated but come on.”

EXCLUSIVE – EXCERPT FROM “THE WILDSTREAK CHRONICLES”

“I’m not sure if I should,” Bellissima intoned huskily, her hesitance betrayed by her quivering girl-whatevers.

“I think,” he said with a gentle nod of his head as he pushed open the secret bookcase door, “it’s time you met the real Geoffrey Endeavor Maximillian Sex.”

The bookcase door swung open exactly like a real door to reveal Mr. Sex’s innermost, privatest sexual playground: a room meticulously painted to look like a city landfill. “When I’m done with my important work,” Geoffrey said, “this is where I can come out to play.”

He kneeled and sunk his hands into the old newspapers, diapers, empty cans of Coke and plastic grocery bags. He swept his arms in two great arcs as his eyes widened and pulse pounded in his super-masculine chest.

“I like doing it on top of or near garbage.”

Bellissima nearly fainted with hyper-lust.