Abetrujillo

Are you a gardener? What kind of cucumbers do you grow? I used to grow lemon cucumbers, but gave up because they got too big and seedy. These days I’m growing Persian cucumbers, which are beautifully thin skinned, with delicate seeds. I usually pick them when they are still on the small side, but even when they grow as big as regular cucumbers, they’re still not at all bitter.

Continue reading "Cucumber Mint Quinoa Salad" »

1.  Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact, just sod off and leave me alone.
2.  Sex is like air. It's not that important unless you aren't getting any.
3.  No one is listening until you pass wind.
4.  Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.
5.  Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
6.  If you think nobody cares whether you're alive or dead, try missing a couple of mortgage payments.
7.  Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
8..  If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
9.  Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
10. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably well worth it.
11. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
12. Some days you are the dog,  some days you are the tree.
13. Don't worry; it only seems kinky the first time.
14.. Good judgment comes from bad experience ... and most of that comes from bad judgment.
15. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
16. There are two excellent theories for arguing with women. Neither one works.
17. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
18. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
19. We are born naked, wet and hungry, and get slapped on our arse - then things just keep getting worse.
20. Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

I suppose this could work for both America and Canada. Yeahhhh!

Today, I heard my son say, "I don't want any bacon with my eggs". Where did I go wrong? FML

Supermarket | London, England, UK

(A customer comes in, looking a little tired. I’m stacking shelves.)

Customer: “Hi, I need some vanilla Häagen-Dazs. Where are your freezers?”

Me: “They’re over here, but I’m afraid I think we’re out of Häagen-Dazs. We have our own brand vanilla.”

(He gives me a look like he’s going to cry.)

Customer: “I’m really sorry. It has to be Häagen-Dazs. It has to be vanilla.” *voice cracking* “Do you know where I could get some?”

(I promised to go and check the store room as he genuinely looked like he was about to burst into tears and I thought maybe he wasn’t very well. Luckily, we had a couple left that hadn’t been brought out. I brought it back and handed it to him. He looks at it like it’s magical, breathes a huge sigh of relief, and heads to the check out. He picks up a mini chocolate cake on the way and I see him talk to my colleague behind the counter. After he’s gone, she comes over to me and hands me the cake.)

Coworker: “That guy just said this is for you. He said he’s going home to his eight-month pregnant monster wife and because of you he’s not going to be murdered tonight.”

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A WOMAN

Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa. Half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally Beautiful!


Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe. Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value.

Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain, very hot, relaxed and convinced of her own beauty.


Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece, gently aging but a warm and desirable place to visit.


Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a glorious and all conquering past.


Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel, has been through war,
doesn't make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.


Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada, self-preserving, but open to meeting new people.


After 70, she becomes Tibet . Wildly beautiful, with a mysterious past and
the wisdom of the ages. An adventurous spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge.

THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN


Between 1 and 80, a man is like North Korea, ruled by a pair of nuts.

THE END.

Netflix made a big push into educational video when it picked up Scholastic's TV shows, and we now know that this effort has paid off -- The Magic School Bus has been "remarkably popular," Netflix tells the New York Times. It only makes sense, then,...

Tuna. Shrimp. And salmon. These aren't pieces of fish, but rather, transforming robots. Meet Osushi Sentai Sharidaa. They are robots that transform into sushi. Holy mackerel!

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Pretty much every kitchen needs a colander, but they aren't exactly the easiest thing to store in your kitchen. With the RMDLO strainer though, you can strain and steam at your leisure and then just fold the whole thing up into something about the size of a ruler. As an added advantage, the design can even be pushed together on the sides so you can empty the strainer into a small container without any trouble. The piece will also work as a steamer by simply placing it on top of a bowl of water.

You can learn more about the clever design at Homes and Hues: A Colander That Won't Take Up Your Whole Cabinet