Meg Stockbridge

“Convert this PNG to JPEG to that people can open it when I e-mail it.”

- My boss, unfortunately.

Ice Cream Parlor

BC, Canada

(Working as a manager, one of the responsibilities I handle is ordering our ice cream from suppliers. Because of the cost, we have a less than half markup on whole tubs. Since it is so infrequent that entire tubs are requested for purchase, I handle all of those orders personally.)

Employee: “Hey [Me], someone wants a whole tub of ice cream, X flavor.”

Me: “Okay, you want to ring these folks order in, this is their last cone.”

(We do our well practiced tap-out to switch customers.)

Me: “Hello ma’am, I was told you wanted to buy a tub of ice cream?”

Customer: “Yes, I want to order a tub of X, how much will that be?”

Me: “Well, luckily enough, we have enough extras in stock that we can get you a tub today, or I can-“

Customer: “No, I want you to order one in for me.”

Me: “Well, okay, the soonest it can be in on would be…”

(I mentally check the dates, reviewing what my order will look like, and what we will get, and what I can add to the upcoming order.)

Me: “… This Tuesday.”

Customer: “That’s fine, how much will it be?”

Me: “It will be sixty dollars, taxes included, and you can pay at the main-“

Customer: (Interrupting) “No, that’s wrong.”

Me: “Pardon?”

Customer: “No, it’s not sixty dollars for a tub of ice cream, I’m not stupid! I want you to order me in a tub of ice cream, so I can pay you what it costs.”

Me: “Ma’am?”

Customer: “Yes?”

Me: “We purchase our ice cream as a business, not for personal consumption. So after our costs, the price is sixty dollars, with taxes included.”

Customer: “Don’t give me that bulls***, get me your f****** manager so I can order my ice cream”

Me: “Ma’am, I am the department head. I handle all of our ordering, including our ice cream orders. We make exceptions to sell whole tubs, but we buy our ice cream to sell it. So one tub of X will cost sixty dollars, and you can make the purchase at the main cash.”

Customer: “No way does a tub of ice cream cost that much you liar! This is no way to run a business!”

Me: “Ma’am, if we ran our business selling everything at cost, we wouldn’t remain a business for long. Would you like to order your tub of X, or may I return to helping my customers?”

(Luckily, a family who has been waiting patiently catches her eye, the mother and father both glaring at her. Embarrassed, the customer leaves the parlor to go pay for and get a dated receipt for her order.)

Water-resistant, water-proof and life-proof cases can open up a world of freedom for phone addicts. But before the case ever makes the journey to the lake or the pool, it should be tested to ensure that the case and its seals are in working order.

More