Sandra Stewart

I recently ran across a letter written by the writer, investment advisor, and politician Harry Browne. It was a letter intended for his nine-year-old daughter and was published as part of his syndicated newspaper column. I want to share it in its entirety:

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It’s Christmas and I have the usual problem of deciding what to give you. I know you might enjoy many things — books, games, clothes. But I’m very selfish. I want to give you something that will stay with you for more than a few months or years. I want to give you a gift that might remind you of me every Christmas. If I could give you just one thing, I’d want it to be a simple truth that took me many years to learn. If you learn it now, it may enrich your life in hundreds of ways. And it may prevent you from facing many problems that have hurt people who have never learned it. The truth is simply this: No one owes you anything. How could such a simple statement be important? It may not seem so, but understanding it can bless your entire life. No one owes you anything. It means that no one else is living for you, my child. Because no one is you. Each person is living for himself; his own happiness is all he can ever personally feel. When you realize that no one owes you happiness or anything else, you’ll be freed from expecting what isn’t likely to be. It means no one has to love you. If someone loves you, it’s because there’s something special about you that gives him happiness. Find out what that something special is and try to make it stronger in you, so that you’ll be loved even more. When people do things for you, it’s because they want to — because you, in some way, give them something meaningful that makes them want to please you, not because anyone owes you anything. No one has to like you. If your friends want to be with you, it’s not out of duty. Find out what makes others happy so they’ll want to be near you. No one has to respect you. Oklahoma City Thunder Some people may even be unkind to you. But once you realize that people don’t have to be good to you, and may not be good to you, you’ll learn to avoid those who would harm you. For you don’t owe them anything either. No one owes you anything. You owe it to yourself to be the best person possible.

Because if you are, others will want to be with you, want to provide you with the things you want in exchange for what you’re giving to them. Some people will choose not to be with you for reasons that have nothing to do with you. When that happens, look elsewhere for the relationships you want. Don’t make someone else’s problem your problem. Once you learn that you must earn the love and respect of others, you’ll never expect the impossible and you won’t be disappointed. Others don’t have to share their property with you, nor their feelings or thoughts. If they do, it’s because you’ve earned these things. And you have every reason to be proud of the love you receive, your friends’ respect, the property you’ve earned. But don’t ever take them for granted. If you do, you could lose them. They’re not yours by right; you must always earn them. A great burden was lifted from my shoulders the day I realized that no one owes me anything. For so long as I’d thought there were things I was entitled to, I’d been wearing myself out — physically and emotionally — trying to collect them. No one owes me moral conduct, respect, friendship, love, courtesy, or intelligence. And once I recognized that, all my relationships became far more satisfying.

I’ve focused on being with people who want to do the things I want them to do. That understanding has served me well with friends, business associates, lovers, sales prospects, and strangers. adidas neo It constantly reminds me that I can get what I want only if I can enter the other person’s world. I must try to understand how he thinks, what he believes to be important, what he wants.

Only then can I appeal to someone in ways that will bring me what I want. And only then can I tell whether I really want to be involved with someone. And I can save the important relationships for those with whom I have the most in common. It’s not easy to sum up in a few words what has taken me years to learn. But maybe if you re-read this gift each Christmas, the meaning will become a little clearer every year. I hope so, for I want more than anything else for you to understand this simple truth that can set you free: no one owes you anything.

* * *

There is a lot of very wise financial truth contained in that letter, principles that apply brilliantly to the personal finance journey (and life journey) that we all find ourselves on. No one owes you anything. No one owes you the money to retire on. Yes, you’re due some money from Social Security, but only if you’ve paid into it. If you’re lucky, your organization might have some kind of pension plan for you, but that’s part of your compensation for working there. Everything else is up to you. It’s up to you to save for your retirement if you want to have a comfortable retirement. You need to be putting money aside in a 401(k) or a Roth IRA or a similar plan. No one owes you great treatment. People are free to treat you however they like. What you do control, however, is who you choose to associate with. hogan scarpes You can choose to associate with people who treat you well in return for you treating them well. You can choose to associate with people who are doing great things and can inspire you to make better choices in your own life. You can choose to associate with people who are sources of great advice and wisdom and insight and knowledge. You can also choose not to associate with people who don’t treat you well. You can choose to avoid people who offer paths full of poor decisions. You decide who you spend your time with. Nike Free 6.0 No one else decides that but you. No one owes you a job. A job means that someone is giving you money in exchange for your efforts. If you don’t want to put forth the effort, no one is required to put forth the money. Remember, no one is going to give you a job unless the person paying you is going to, at some point, bring in more money than they’re paying you (and the cost of the items you’re using). Jobs aren’t charities. nike air max 1 homme A job is a situation someone else has set up where you can both make some money – you invest your time and effort for some of that money, while the person who bought the location and all of the equipment and figured out all the job protocols for you is making some of that money. If you’re not an efficient part of that, you won’t have a job. You decide whether you want a job or not, and you show whether you want that job with your efforts. The same thing is true for a promotion. No one owes you a promotion. It’s up to you to make the case that you’re more deserving of that promotion than anyone. If you can’t make that case, then that promotion shouldn’t be yours anyway. Yeah, sometimes people get promotions that don’t “deserve” them. Again, whatever the reason was for that other person getting the promotion, it comes down to the fact that you didn’t make a good enough case to earn that promotion for yourself. It wasn’t owed to you. The same thing is true for business. No one owes you business success. You earn it by working your tail off and proving you have the knowledge and the talent to produce a product that people want and are willing to pay for in some fashion or another. This is true for everyone from Bill Gates to a person making YouTube videos. Florida State Seminoles They all make money from their business by making – or having made – things that people want. If you can’t put together some system for doing that, you aren’t going to have success in business. It is not owed to you.

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No one owes you courtesy or friendship or respect. Those things are earned, not given. You choose for yourself whether or not you want to behave in a way that earns courtesy or friendship or respect.

Even then, you might not necessarily receive it, though the odds go up greatly. These statements may seem like negative things. They might seem like a list of hard truths about life. However, the opposite is true. For starters, things that you haven’t earned in some fashion are relatively valueless. Think about friendship, for starters. When someone that you barely know begins acting like your best friend, it feels completely unnatural. On the other hand, when you’ve known someone for years and they act like your best friend, it feels completely natural. What’s the difference? Your real best friend earned that status. They have shown you friendship and kindness for a long time. This new person? They may have shown you friendship and kindness really recently, but the idea that you’ve got a long-term friendship feels hollow because it is hollow. That friendship – that thing that really means something and has real value in your life – has to be built up. nike air max goedkoop It has to be earned. Things that have real value are things that you’ve actually earned. That false friendship isn’t going to feel like a major loss to you if it disappears. mochilas kanken baratas However, if that close friend you’ve had for years disappeared, you’d know it. goedkoop nike air max 2016 It would hurt. Why? Because that close friendship has value. That value isn’t owed to you. That value is built over a long period with a lot of little efforts that add up to something big. Another truth: You are largely in control of your own destiny. Yes, outside events can and do happen, but you decide whether or not you have a good shot at that promotion or whether you’re never going to get it. You make that choice through your regular actions. Have you earned that promotion? Undoubtedly, decisions are made outside of your control that are sometimes completely unfair, but that still doesn’t make it okay for you to not make the best case for yourself. You decide what you think about. You decide what you do with your time. You decide what you do with your money. You decide how much effort to put in. asics tiger mujer You decide whether to keep bearing down on that task or to get distracted by social media or to get into a conversation at the water cooler. Those are your decisions. No one else makes them but you. Over the course of a lot of those decisions, you shape what kind of a life that you have. A person with a great career has done things to build that great career. They’ve gone the extra mile to get their foot in the door. They’ve done their homework to keep their skills sharp. They’ve leapt at every opportunity to step forward and succeed. Can you say the same about yourself? A person with a lot of friends has done things to earn those friendships. They’ve put themselves in social situations. They’ve reached out to others with common interests and values. They’ve coordinated countless social events for themselves and others. They’re there when their close friends need them. Can you say the same about yourself? A person with sustainable wealth has done things to preserve that wealth and often to earn that wealth. They’ve spent less than they’ve earned over many years. They’ve made smart financial choices year after year after year. Can you say the same about yourself? A person with great fitness and a healthy looking body has done things to preserve that health and look. Nike Air Max Pas Cher They’re careful about almost everything they eat – you might see them eating treats sometimes, but it’s likely that most of their other meals are extremely healthy. nike air max goedkoop They devote time to exercise and getting in better shape. Can you say the same about yourself? A person who is considered wise has done things to cultivate that wisdom. LA Dodgers Jersey They have spent a lot of time observing people and situations and then counterbalancing that with the teachings of great teachers and readings from great books. They’ve thought carefully about their own experiences and what they’ve learned and can combine all of that together into sage advice.

Can you say the same about yourself? You see, the truth is that the big picture of your life is made up of how you use each day, each hour, each minute. You decide whether you’re building a valuable career with nearly every workplace choice.

You decide whether you’re building a healthy financial portfolio with every dime you spend. You decide whether you’re building a strong family with every single choice you make to spend time with them or to do other things. You decide whether you’re building a strong social network with every single choice regarding whether you choose to be social or curl up in a safe ball in a comfortable chair. You decide whether you’re building wisdom with every single choice regarding whether you reflect on life and face challenging materials and ideas or whether you watch a reality television marathon. Those are choices that you make. No one else makes those choices but you. You decide whether you want to find success in the areas of your life that you want. That success is not owed to you. It is the outcome of all of your little choices about how you live your life, how you act toward others, how you use your time. If you want to succeed at finances – or at anything else in your life – that success is going to be borne solely out of a long series of positive choices. That doesn’t guarantee success, of course, but it is a required ingredient. If you aren’t making positive choice after positive choice, if you aren’t taking positive action after positive action, the success you want isn’t going to happen.

Success is not owed to you. Whenever you feel unhappy about the state of things in some aspect of your life, remember that no one owes you anything. Instead, the things you want are largely earned. Yes, unfortunate events happen, but it is entirely in your court as to whether that cloud has a silver lining or not. Yes, great events happen, but it is entirely in your court as to whether that advantage does to waste. The ingredient that matters is you. What are you going to choose to do? Are you going to buy that silly thing at the gas station? Are you going to whip out your plastic at that big clothing sale? Or are you going to keep your wallet in your pocket? Making the right choice again and again is the foundation of financial success. Are you going to sit there and browse social media for a while? Are you going to spend an hour pretending to work so that your boss will leave you alone? Or are you going to knuckle down and do the work? Are you going to spend some focused time sharpening your skills? Are you going to build some great workplace relationships or connections to people in your field? Making the right choice again and again is the foundation of career success. Are you going to just toss the first idea you have out there and expect customers to come to your door? Are you going to instead hone that idea over and over again until it’s rock-solid? Are you going to research every single cost and write an effective business plan for your idea? Are you going to get feedback on your plans and revise them and get more feedback until you feel ready to launch? Making the right choice again and again is the foundation of a successful side gig. Are you going to sit on your couch and wonder why your phone isn’t dinging constantly with texts? Are you going to go out to some kind of community event tonight? Are you going to make it your goal to connect with at least five people in the room well enough that you exchange contact info? Making the right choice again and again is the foundation of a great social network. Even if bad events happen, you’ll overcome them with these steady good choices. If great fortune happens, then these little choices will just accelerate it. On the other hand, if you make a steady flood of bad choices, unfortunate events will just accelerate the collapse. Even good fortune will eventually be devoured by lots of little bad decisions. You are not owed financial success. You are not owed career success. You are not owed business success. You are not owed social success. You are not owed success. You make it with a flood of these little choices. No one owes you anything. It’s up to you to make the things you want.

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No matter what it is that makes you happy, you can get bored of it after a while. This is because of a concept known as “hedonic adaptation.” Simply put, there’s no one thing that will make you happy forever. Eventually, you get used to it and need something different. That’s why you need to break your routine.

As tips blog Barking Up the Wrong Tree explains, we’re very good at adapting to any circumstances over time. Even if we’ve spent our whole lives pursuing something, once we’ve got it, we start adapting to it. Soon, it becomes normal. Once it’s normal, it can start to get boring. It doesn’t matter that we worked for decades to get there, we’ve got it now so it’s not exciting anymore. To avoid this, University of California professor Sonja Lyubomirsky suggests keeping things novel:

Novelty, variety and surprise can prevent or slow down adaptation. So, with relationships, let’s say you get married and you get a happiness boost. Studies show that it takes about two years for people’s happiness levels to go back to what they were before the wedding. That doesn’t mean that you’re not happy with your marriage, but we get used to it to some extent. So we want to introduce some variety and novelty and surprise to the marriage in a positive way. Don’t watch Netflix every Friday night; mix it up. Do different things with your partner. The kind of things that can lead to more surprises, again in a positive way. Same thing with a job. Open yourself up to new opportunities, challenges, taking risks, learning new things, and meeting new people.

Novelty and variety are difficult because they require us to break routines. Routines are easy. Pursuing something different is hard. However, boredom is powerful. It can drive us to take for granted the things we have in our lives that are valuable. Of course, this should also be balanced with regular gratitude sessions, because let’s face it, a parade of exciting events isn’t always going to be enough.

How To Find Happiness: 3 Secrets From Research | Barking Up the Wrong Tree

Photo by John Morgan.

A Chicago based artist/rat spotted this excellent prank flyer on a phone pole in Chicago. He has so far managed to avoid eating any of the artist bait that's been left out for him and his kind.

President Obama and Osman Yaya

At a visit to Washington, DC’s Anacostia Neighborhood Library on April 30, President Barack Obama announced two new initiatives that promise to rally America’s libraries, publishers, and nonprofit organizations to strengthen learning opportunities for all children, particularly in low-income communities. The plan, dubbed the ConnectED Library Challenge, will engage civic leaders, libraries, and schools to work together to ensure that all school students receive public library cards. Commitments from 30 library systems are already in place.

As part of an effort to provide broad access to digital content, the Open eBooks Initiative has secured a promise from the “Big Five” publishers and a number of independent presses to provide $250 million in free ebooks to low-income students. Some 10,000 popular titles will be made available over the next three years, and libraries have joined forces with nonprofits to create an app to deliver the content, as well as material from the public domain.

The new programs are an outgrowth of the president’s original ConnectED initiative, announced two years ago with the goal of transforming teaching and learning through digital connectivity and content. The Institute of Museum and Library Services (IMLS) is investing $5 million in support of the ereader app, as well as tools and services to help the public more easily access ebooks and other digital content.

STRONG PARTNERSHIPS

The American Library Association (ALA) and Urban Libraries Council (ULC) have committed to working closely with the White House in order to help the initiative realize its goals. Emily Sheketoff, executive director of ALA’s Washington Office, described the initiatives as natural outgrowths of work already in progress in a number of libraries across the country.

For the Library Challenge, ULC and ALA reached out to 30 library directors, who in turn got commitments from their school superintendents and local political leadership to design a library card program for their districts. IMLS created a platform for all the communities involved to discuss the issues they encounter, Sheketoff explained, “so that all libraries would have the opportunity to move forward with a plan, with some best practices, and some ideas of how they can implement it.” IMLS plans to convene these working groups later in 2015, with ALA and ULC publicizing the information through their respective channels.

The New York Public Library (NYPL) will play an important role in the new effort through its development of the new content delivery app. The app, which will allow users to seamlessly browse and read ebook titles on a variety of devices—including tablets donated as part of the ConnectEd initiative and smartphones, which are increasingly used by Americans at all income levels—will be released later this year.

Sheketoff noted that she hopes some of the $100 million worth of devices that Apple has promised to donate as part of ConnectEd will go to libraries as well as schools. “We know that children don’t take books from school for reading for pleasure,” she told LJ, “so if he really wants people to be reading for pleasure those devices should be going to the library.”

In a statement, NYPL president Tony Marx said, “The New York Public Library is proud to participate in this important program, which will have tremendous social benefits in terms of literacy, and will mark a groundbreaking shift in how publishers provide ebooks to the public. The program is certainly in line with the Library’s mission to make information—and by extension opportunity—available to all, and we look forward to working with the White House on this and other projects in the future. We also look forward to continuing our work with publishers, as we maneuver the relatively new, ever-changing world of e-content.”

NYPL will also partner with Firstbook, a nonprofit that coordinates book donations for children in need, to help make sure that ebooks reach students in low-income families.

The Digital Public Library of America (DPLA) will work closely with IMLS, NYPL, and Firstbook, mobilizing its national network of librarians to help coordinate public domain books for inclusion in the program, and to help connect children with books that match their reading levels and interests. Librarians will work with publishers to create recommendation and suggestion lists.

“We view this initiative as a critical next step in DPLA’s overall mission to maximize access to our shared culture,” said DPLA executive director Dan Cohen in a statement. “With the centrality of books in our culture and the importance of encouraging reading both for learning and for pure enjoyment, we felt it was essential to find creative ways to increase that access.”

President Obama at the Anacostia Neighborhood Library, Washington, DC

IN PRAISE OF LIBRARIES

President Obama has been working to highlight the importance of lifelong learning and the crucial role of America’s public libraries. The president visited the ImaginOn branch of the Charlotte Mecklenberg Library, NC on April 15, and recently paid public tribute to his fifth-grade teacher, adding, “This is a story that every single kid in this country, regardless of background or station in life, should be able to tell. Sharing stories like these helps underline the vital importance of fighting for that reality.”

At his visit to the Anacostia Neighborhood Library, in one of the district’s poorest neighborhoods, Obama stated: “I really want to talk about how we can harness the amazing technological revolution going on to help people read and be able to get great jobs and start their own businesses and do great things.”

Obama stressed the value of reading, and told the assembled crowd of middle schoolers, “We’re going to provide millions of ebooks online so they’re available for young people who maybe don’t have as many books at home, don’t have access to a full stock of reading materials.”

While he mentioned that libraries around the country were taking part in his initiative, he said, “The New York Public Library in particular is taking the lead” on the collaboration with book publishers.

Osman Yaya, a sixth-grade student at Wicomico County Public Schools’ Bennett Middle School in Salisbury, MD, interviewed the president and asked questions that had been submitted beforehand. Viewers submitted thousands of questions, said Yaya; one was, “Did you enjoy reading [when you were a kid]? What types of books sparked your imagination and interest?” Yaya also asked Obama about his own books.

The President said that he enjoyed Dr. Seuss, the “Hardy Boys,” and The Lord of the Rings. “I’m still a big Dr. Seuss fan—The Sneeches, Horton, and all that stuff,” he said.

“I also enjoyed reading science books,” he told Yaya. “I loved reading about planets and dinosaurs.” In high school, he read Of Mice and Men and The Great Gatsby, and later was motivated to think about becoming president by the civil rights movement and Martin Luther King. ”The people who really inspired me were people who were bringing something back to the community or making something better.” Obama added, “I used to love libraries and reading I still love reading, but I don’t get to read for fun as much as I do for my work.”

She shreds.

(more…)

Are you ready for some mind-altering, existential truth? Then by all means, behold: Cookie Monster. Not afraid to ask the difficult questions, his inquiring mind is like a tour guide for the hungry.

Bill Gates has an incredible statistic: According the USGS' cement statistics, China has used more concrete from 2011 to 2013 (6.6 gigatons) than the United States in the entire 20th century (4.5 gigatons). It blows my mind but, then again, as Gates point out, look at Shanghai's evolution...

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