IKEA Monkey

You have a very rare chance to purchase a Harry Weese River Cottage, inspired by 1950s communist architecture in Hungary. [ more › ]

Work commutes can really suck , especially when it takes two hours to travel 10 miles. Here are the cities where you’ll spend the most time just sitting in traffic.

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The proof is in the pavement.

ConAgra, the maker of popular foods including Slim Jims and Orville Redenbacher's popcorn, is moving its headquarters from Omaha to Chicago. [ more › ]

You know that song that plays during the Interrupting John Cena meme? It’s important that you know how it works musically.

Beat Breakdown posted the following video breaking down the beat and samples in John Cena’s ‘The Time Is Now,’ aka OH GREAT HERE COMES JOHN CENA, from his 2005 album You Can’t See Me. It’s short and kinda fascinating, especially if you’re like me and have no idea how music works.

Reminder, folks: Every time Cena runs to the ring, you owe a debt of gratitude to ‘Ante Up’ by M.O.P. and ‘The Night the Lights Went Out in Georgia’ by Bobby Russell.

I want a series like this that breaks down the beats in other wrestling entrance themes. Give me one for ‘American Males.’ “Uh, okay, so there’s a didgeridoo, and then Devo jumps in to say AMERICAN MALES seven times, and then suddenly we’re doing a hair metal song about how Marcus Alexander Bagwell and Scotty Riggs will find you and hurt you, possibly sexually, if you try to talk to them. Whoops, and now Devo’s back.” Maybe do one for Billy Gunn’s ‘Ass Man’ where they just stare at the screen with disbelief on their faces.

ROSEBURG, OR—In the hours following a violent rampage in southwestern Oregon in which a lone attacker killed 10 individuals and seriously injured seven others, citizens living in the only country where this kind of mass killing routinely occurs reportedly concluded Thursday that there was no way to prevent the massacre from taking place. “This was a terrible tragedy, but sometimes these things just happen and there’s nothing anyone can do to stop them,” said Ohio resident Lindsay Bennett, echoing sentiments expressed by tens of millions of individuals who reside in a nation where over half of the world’s deadliest mass shootings have occurred in the past 50 years and whose citizens are 20 times more likely to die of gun violence than those of other developed nations. “It’s a shame, but what can we do? There really wasn’t anything that was going to keep this ...

Another mass shooting in America on Thursday, this time at Umpqua Community College in Roseburg, Oregon. At least 10 are confirmed dead, another 20 are injured, and the gunman, also deceased, has been identified only as a 20-year-old male. [UPDATE: The Douglas County Sheriff’s office is now reporting 10 fatalities and 7 injuries in the shooting, numbers lower than previously reported by the state attorney general.]

Read more on President Obama Asks Americans To Stop Shooting Each Other, For Real This Time…

The post President Obama Asks Americans To Stop Shooting Each Other, For Real This Time appeared first on Wonkette.

Too soon?

At least ten people are reportedly dead after a gunman opened fire this morning at Umpqua Community College in Roseburg, Oregon. At least seven were injured.

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There may come a time when you want to strike up a conversation with a stranger, for whatever reason: sex, companionship, money, boredom. Here is the rule: You get two questions.

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GPOYW with the sweetest girl. #snowygram #gpoyw

This is the story of a giant pile of beef.

It’s no secret that weddings now often cost more than a French chateau, so it’s understandable that some newlyweds would be annoyed by guests canceling at the last minute. No matter how upset a bride and groom are, however, there’s absolutely no excuse to send absent guests a bill for their dinner. But apparently no one mentioned to a newly married couple who invoiced a couple of guests.

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Even on Labor Day, there can be no rest for action star and known baller Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson. The Rock brought home two new French Bulldog puppies Monday—BRUTUS and HOBBS (all caps, please)—and wouldn’t you know it, as soon as he set them down outside, those cute li’l fuckers ran straight for his baller-ass swimming pool.

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OH GODDAMMIT, IF TRUE. Good, decent people in America are trying really hard to think the best of this new commie pope, who seems to be trying to take the focus off hot button wingnut issues to return the Church’s focus to real problems like caring for the poor, the sick, and the downtrodden. And he has done and said some good things! Kim Davis is not poor. She is not sick. And despite what the bigot demons in her head tell her, she is CERTAINLY not downtrodden.

Read more on Kim Davis’s Lawyers Say She Had A Secret Stitch ‘N’ Bitch With Pope Francis…

The post Kim Davis’s Lawyers Say She Had A Secret Stitch ‘N’ Bitch With Pope Francis appeared first on Wonkette.

The Saudi royals are not like you and me: they’re rich as hell and drama seems to follow them wherever they go, so maybe in a sense maybe they’re more like you and me than we ever realized. But this week that nebulous cloud of drama hanging overhead took a dark turn, as a prince accused of rape vanished into thin air.

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Gov. Bruce Rauner has offered packaged food giant ConAgra tax incentives to move its headquarters from Omaha to Chicago, according to a source familiar with the deal.

The revelation comes on the heels of news that ConAgra is negotiating to lease office space large enough to accommodate as many...

A new study shows that men are perceived as more creative thinkers than women producing similar work.

On his recent visit to Philadelphia, Pope Francis looked his younger self in the eye, remembering the childlike wonder with which he used to see the world before he grew into a man, rose through the ranks of the Church, and came to bear the strictures, hopes, and aspirations of an entire religion on his aging shoulders.

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It was another violent weekend in Chicago with more than 50 people shot for the second weekend in a row. [ more › ]

If you’ve ever been to a pet store, you might have seen pet tag vending machines that can quickly and cheaply engrave tags for your pets. However, you can also use these to make sturdy tags for your luggage, or even your keys.

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Those wily gays have done it again: They’ve taken advantage of some poor (relatively; they’ve got nearly $900,000 of supporters’ money) god-fearing Christians and forced them to bake a pizza pie for the most awful masquerade of sin: A gay wedding.

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"She was jaws wide open, right in front of my face," said Braxton Rocha.

Caterpillar announced Thursday that it expects to permanently reduce its workforce by 4,000 to 5,000 by the end of 2016.

Guy with cornrows eats corn while listening to Korn.

Chicagoans will have a rare chance to see a Supermoon total lunar eclipse on Sunday evening. [ more › ]

At first, it’s reasonable to think that this video’s protagonist, a man from Malden, is laying the Massachusetts accent on a little thick as he reacts to seeing a sunfish in the water. Oh man, Jay, it’s dead, bro, or somethin’! Michael Bergin’s interview with the Boston Globe basically confirms that no, this guy is the real deal.

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