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27 Mar 17:45

We put our hands all over the weirdest game controllers of the year

by Sam Machkovech
Darendukes

neat

SAN FRANCISCO—For years, we've put one particular item on our annual Game Developers Conference itinerary: the most elaborate and inconvenient game controller this side of a Japanese arcade.

Every year, international teams submit their craziest hardwired contraptions to GDC's Alt.Ctrl Competition, and the winners get massive booth space to let passersby grab, smack, pull, and sit on whatever custom rigs the teams have dreamed up. (We've written about these exhibits a few years running.) Some of our favorites from that booth are in the above gallery, and their captions explain what's going on in each game.

To be clear: most of these will likely never launch either at arcades or for home purchase. That's not surprising, though I would probably pay for a Hellcouch conversion kit if it existed, just to mess with house guests. (A few creators hinted at releasing their work as downloads to be applied to build-it-yourself kits, but I didn't find any yet released for the above games in my cursory search.)

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26 Mar 22:41

The First Two Twilight Zone Episodes Get Trailers That Prepare Us for the Madness

by Germain Lussier

In just a week, Jordan Peele’s reboot of The Twilight Zone will be here. The show’s first two episodes debut on CBS All Access April 1, and both now have stunning trailers giving us a taste of what to expect when that happens.

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26 Mar 20:53

Madcap co-op puzzler Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes headed to mobile

by Jordan Devore
Darendukes

This was a fun party game.

Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes is a one-of-a-kind multiplayer puzzle game full of panicked bewilderment and a-ha moments. One player has control over a ticking time bomb; everyone else has to parse and explain how to disarm doodads using intricate rules from a bomb-defusal manual.

Each side has information the other doesn't (the helpers can't see the physical bomb and the bomb holder can't see the rule book), so attention to detail and effective communication are crucial to winning. It's the type of game that only gets better as you develop a weird shorthand with your group. There's also a range of options to make the challenge more (or less) complex, so it stays fresh.

While it has traditionally been a VR-centric experience, Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes dropped that requirement with releases on PS4, Xbox One, and Nintendo Switch. Next up, the game will offer "fully-featured" mobile versions later this year. You won't need a VR headset to play on iOS or Android.

It's a great rambunctious party game and opening it up to mobile will make setup that much easier.

Madcap co-op puzzler Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes headed to mobile screenshot

26 Mar 20:01

'Moons of Madness' blends Lovecraft with 'Dead Space'

by Jon Fingas
Darendukes

neat

There aren't many great H.P. Lovecraft-inspired games, let alone ones that venture outside of Lovecraft's time period, but Rock Pocket Games and Funcom think can do both at once. They've announced Moons of Madness, a "cosmic horror" game that blends...
25 Mar 18:53

This Amazing School Play Of ‘Alien’ Had No Budget And Used Trash To Make Costumes

by Giedrė
Darendukes

Awesome pictures.

Many people say that kids are the future and it’s hard to disagree when they show how truly creative, innovative and dedicated they are. New Jersey’s North Bergen High School drama club students recently proved that when they performed their own take on the 1979 science fiction horror classic Alien. The group turned Ridley Scott’s masterpiece into a stage play that was performed only twice, on March 19 and 22, 2019.

This high school drama club turned 1979 ‘Alien’ into a school play

Image credits: oh_pollo

As images of the play surfaced on the internet, people’s interest increased and the snaps, as well as footage, were shared on such platforms as Twitter and Reddit. People were not only impressed by the club’s decision to turn the 1979 film into a play but also how impressive the props and the scenes (like the facehugger one) were.

Image credits: Fueledbyjelaa

Turns out, the xenomorph suit, as well as other costumes, were made using recycled materials. The art director and teacher, Steven Defendini often sifts through garbage to recycle someone’s trash into truly impressive art. As his girlfriend reported on Twitter, the funding for the school’s district was cut some years ago, forcing to find other means to make things like this play happen.

Image credits: oh_pollo

Fortunately, instead of brooding over the unfortunate funding situation, Steven uses this as a perfect opportunity to inspire his students to adapt and overcome by being resourceful and creative. Luckily, the drama club kids sure don’t lack creativity as the play shows.

Image credits: oh_pollo

They even filmed a pretty impressive trailer for their two shows, showcasing the cast and the setting of the play. The information on the trailer reports that the tickets to the show cost a respectable amount of $5.

Image credits: lucario2001jp9

One of the students involved in the production, Justin Pierson, took to Reddit to answer some questions, commenting on the special effects as well as how they managed to pull the play off. “The chest burster has someone underneath the table,” he explained. “There’s a separate person who wears a fake head for Ash attack the others. And there’s someone inside one of the eggs holding a facehugger and throws it at the person playing Kane” the student elaborated on the details.

Image credits: defendinisart

As for why the club chose ‘Alien’ for their production, there were a few reasons for it. “I believe the idea spurred up because the teacher in charge of the entire operation, Mr. Cuervo, saw a failed production and it being the 40th anniversary,” Justin told Bored Panda. “I think everyone’s reaction to it being Alien was similar to mine where I was just like “That’s crazy. How are they pulling this off?” he recalled his colleague and his reaction to the announcement of the idea.

Image credits: Perfecto Cuervo

“Unfortunately there are many people assuming that we are from Bergen County and are extremely rich” Pierson added, addressing the production costs. With no budget, the students only had motivation and creativity to work with, and they definitely pulled it off. “Kids are extremely motivated and passionate about what they are doing” the student concluded.

Image credits: nbhs

“The people were blown away. There were a lot of gasps and “awes” in the audience on opening night.” Justin commented on how the audience reacted to their production and the massive set they’ve constructed from garbage. “Then on the second night, people came […] just to see it again,” he reported.

Image credits: Fueledbyjelaa

Image credits: Fueledbyjelaa

Image credits: defendinisart

Watch the trailer of the play below

 

People on the internet responded with their support

Image credits: StarvingHamster

Image credits: donttrythis

Image credits: ValerieSprague

Image credits: stcvebarnes

Image credits: oh_pollo

Image credits: andrewturnb

Image credits: pascalblanche

Image credits: MrDavidFisher

Image credits: realaaronrice

25 Mar 17:02

A High School in New Jersey Turned Alien Into a Gigerific Stage Play

by Julie Muncy
Darendukes

Good for you.

Generally speaking, creating unlicensed adaptations of film properties is frowned upon in local theater scenes. But sometimes, you get away with it by creating something super rad, which is what happened in the case of Alien: The Play, a full-length adaptation of Ridley Scott’s
Alien helmed by Perfecto Cuervo, an…

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22 Mar 18:39

To rival Amazon, UPS enters healthcare—with doorstep nurse delivery

by Beth Mole
Darendukes

Wtf... I could never get high enough to come up with an idea crazier than this.

A United Parcel Service Inc. (UPS) logo is displayed on the door of a truck

Enlarge / A United Parcel Service Inc. (UPS) logo is displayed on the door of a truck (credit: Getty | Bloomberg)

UPS is crossing the threshold into healthcare, with plans for a new service that will deliver vaccine-toting nurses to customers' doorsteps.

A test for the new service is scheduled for later this year, but UPS didn’t name where it will take place or which vaccine it will offer, only saying that it would be an immunization for adults against a viral illness. Vaccine-maker Merck & Co is reportedly considering partnering with UPS on the service.

News of the plan was first reported by Reuters. Ars confirmed the report with UPS, but a UPS spokesperson specifically working on the project did not immediately get back to us. This post will be updated with any additional information we receive.

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22 Mar 04:26

Alamo Season Pass will offer unlimited movies for $20 per month

by AJ Dellinger
Alamo Drafthouse is getting ready to officially launch its subscription service. After several months of beta testing, CEO Tim League told Business Insider the company is going to make its Alamo Season Pass available to the public before the end of t...
22 Mar 04:26

Oh Hell No: Snake Catcher Finds 45 Rattlesnakes at Texas Home After Being Called to Remove a 'Few'

by Catie Keck

A thing you probably hope to never find underneath your home is one rattlesnake—much less a small army of them.

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21 Mar 19:26

When Marvel Starts Selling Off Props, It's Time to Really Say Goodbye to Those Netflix Shows

by Germain Lussier
Darendukes

I'd like to own a cool prop from a movie or tv show..

Even though Netflix has cancelled all of its Marvel shows over the past few months, fans may still be holding onto the hope they could return. And while that’s nice in theory, the fact Marvel is about to literally sell pieces of the shows back to fans probably isn’t a good sign.

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21 Mar 18:05

First-person digger: Stanley Black & Decker’s game controller for excavators

by Sean Gallagher
Darendukes

I like it.

An operator puts an excavator to work with a game-style controller using Stanley's ROC remote operating system.

Enlarge / An operator puts an excavator to work with a game-style controller using Stanley's ROC remote operating system. (credit: Stanley Black & Decker)

In a parking lot at an industrial and office park just outside Baltimore, I took a mid-sized excavator for a spin. I pushed around some cinder blocks with a leveling blade, nosed them around with the excavator's shovel, and maneuvered the heavy metal beast around to make room for an incoming tractor-trailer. And I did all of this with a wireless controller that was almost identical to the one I used to play Forza the night before.

The excavator was configured with a prototype of the Remote Operated Control (ROC) System from Stanley Black & Decker's Infrastructure Innovation unit—a bolt-on remote control system that allows heavy machinery from major manufacturers to be operated either from in the cab as usual or with a wireless game-style controller.

Stanley is currently recruiting contracting companies to act as beta testers for the technology, which is currently being targeted at Bobcat, CAT, Kubota, and John Deere excavators under 10 tons. The remote control kit can be installed in existing excavators in about 5 hours by someone with little to no mechanical experience. And the control system has a physical switch that allows an operator to quickly switch back and forth between local and remote control.

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15 Mar 17:50

There Are 432 Minutes of Game of Thrones Left

by James Whitbrook
Darendukes

My body is ready.

HBO has officially confirmed the runtime of Game of Thrones’ final season. Across six episodes, fans have just 432 minutes left to spend with Jon, Dany, and the rest of Westeros. Prepare yourselves...accordingly?

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14 Mar 17:59

Titans Has Found Its Slade Wilson

by James Whitbrook and Gordon Jackson
Darendukes

20th Century Fox has released a trailer for six new short films set in the universe of Ridley Scott’s Alien franchise, in honor of the original film’s 40th anniversary. The shorts are titled, “Alone,” “Containment,” “Harvest,” “Night Shift,” “Ore,” and “Specimen.”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8C8OPS3avo

Fuck yes.

The Picard show adds another mysterious main cast member. Get a look at how Alien is celebrating its 40th anniversary. John Carpenter’s Syfy anthology is no more. Plus, the Pirates of the Caribbean reboot may have a new writer, and get ready for Gemini Man to maybe mess with your eyes. Spoilers, go!

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13 Mar 22:43

Fallout 76’s New Booze Questline Offers A Fun Reason To Return

by Ethan Gach
Darendukes

*doubt

Fallout 76’s seventh major patch Wild Appalachia arrived today and with it comes a host of changes. There are the usual fixes and improvements, but the new update also includes some new content that helps bring some life back into the game’s previously stagnant world.

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13 Mar 21:19

Report: EA Paid Ninja $1 Million To Stream Apex Legends

by Nathan Grayson
Darendukes

So we really missed the boat on being annoying and streaming video games for money.

These days, it’s not uncommon to see big companies promote their games by cutting deals with top YouTubers and streamers, but how much does one of those deals cost? In the case of chameleon-haired Twitch king Tyler “Ninja” Blevins, the number could be as high as $1 million.

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13 Mar 18:15

Ancient Britons Traveled Hundreds of Miles to Attend Pork Fests at Stonehenge

by George Dvorsky
Darendukes

Given how Gizmodo has historically written article titles, this does not refer to the type of 'Pork Fest' that I thought.

Prehistoric Britons traveled impressive distances to attend celebrations at monumental sites like Stonehenge, according to new research. Incredibly, many of them brought their pigs along with them for the journey—an impressive feat, considering some participants came from hundreds of miles away.

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11 Mar 23:50

Strange Man Lures Unsuspecting Fallout 76 Players Into Deadly Labyrinth

by Ethan Gach

Role-play has always been where Fallout 76 has shown the most promise, and nothing better illustrates that than some stranger in a nightgown wandering around Appalachia searching for fresh victims to bring back to his homemade labyrinth.

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11 Mar 23:03

Brightburn's Latest Trailer Might Be the Best Spin on Superman in Years

by Charles Pulliam-Moore
Darendukes

Fuck yes! This is exactly what I want to see

Raising a child is a terrifying, thrilling experience for all first-time parents because there’s no one way to make sure that you’re doing everything the “right” way and what said way would even necessarily look like. For the Breyers, the family at the center of David Yarovesky’s sci-fi/horror film Brightburn, the…

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11 Mar 22:26

24-Player Mario Kart Is A Bloodbath

by Luke Plunkett
Darendukes

neat

I’ve always wondered why Mario Kart races—in recent years, anyway—have been capped at 12 racers when the hardware could surely handle more. Looking at this madness, it’s probably to preserve everyone’s sanity.

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11 Mar 22:26

Here be dragons: HBO drops full trailer for Game of Thrones final season

by Jennifer Ouellette
Darendukes

awwww shiiiittt

First full trailer for HBO's final season of Game of Thrones shows the humans readying for battle against the Night King's undead army.

It's been a long, long wait, but winter is finally here for fans of HBO's Game of Thrones. The first full trailer for the hotly anticipated final season dropped today, featuring plenty of dragons, our favorite surviving characters, and lots of dark, ominous overtones as the living prepare to battle the Night King's undead army.

(Warning: Spoilers for prior seasons below.)

Based on George R.R. Martin's best-selling epic fantasy series, A Song of Ice and Fire, Game of Thrones long ago outstripped the novels in terms of plot, although the author had some input in shaping the TV series' narrative arc. We've seen plenty of sex, blood, and horrifying death over the course of seven seasons, and now it's time for the end game. This being George R.R. Martin, there's no guarantee of a happy ending.

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11 Mar 22:25

George R.R. Martin Says There May Be 'Discrepancies' Between the Game of Thrones Finale and His Books

by Beth Elderkin
Darendukes

Prediction: George R.R. Martin will die before he finishes A Song of Ice and Fire series.

Yes, George R.R. Martin is still working on The Winds of Winter. Yes, that means A Dream of Spring will come eventually. But before that happens, we’re getting the eighth and final season of HBO’s Game of Thrones. What will this spoil for fans of the A Song of Ice and Fire series? Hopefully: not everything.

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08 Mar 20:50

PBR to launch its own whiskey that’s “aged 5 seconds”

by Kate Bernot on The Takeout, shared by Laura M. Browning to The A.V. Club

On face, you’re right to be slightly skeptical of a Pabst Blue Ribbon whiskey. What does a beer brand like PBR know about distilling? But the news that PBR will release its own whiskey actually has some promise: The whiskey will be a collaboration with New Holland, Michigan-based New Holland Artisan Spirits, an…

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08 Mar 00:16

Unknown NES Game Found After 30 Years

by Luke Plunkett
Darendukes

neat

When we talk about obscure or “lost” games, we normally need to have known about them in the first place to know they were missing. It’s not often we see a case like this, where a collector buying a cartridge off a former Nintendo employee is the first time anyone has ever heard of a game.

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05 Mar 00:13

Why 'ji32k7au4a83' Is a Remarkably Common Password

by Rhett Jones
Darendukes

neat

For too many people, moving the digits around in some variation of Patriots69Lover is their idea of a strong password. So you might expect something complicated like” “ji32k7au4a83” would be a great password. But according to the data breach repository Have I Been Pwned (HIBP), it shows up more often than one might…

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04 Mar 23:34

After Roma swept the Oscars, Steven Spielberg seeks to block streaming films

by Samuel Axon
Darendukes

Called it!

Like some other industry figures, Spielberg doesn't seem to like where Hollywood is going.

Enlarge / Like some other industry figures, Spielberg doesn't seem to like where Hollywood is going. (credit: Aurich Lawson / The Simpsons)

A spokesperson for Amblin, the production company run by director Steven Spielberg, has told IndieWire that Spielberg plans to support an effort to change the rules of the Oscars to bar some films primarily distributed via streaming platforms like Netflix from nomination for Academy Awards.

"Steven feels strongly about the difference between the streaming and theatrical situation," the spokesperson told the publication. "He'll be happy if the others will join [his campaign] when that comes up [at the Academy Board of Governors meeting]."

The conversation in Hollywood about the legitimacy of films made for streaming has been fierce since critical darling Roma—a Netflix-backed film from Y Tu Mamá También, Children of Men, and Gravity director Alfonso Cuarón—took home Best Director, Best Foreign Language Film, and Best Cinematography in an unprecedented sweep for a streaming film. However, Roma lost Best Picture to controversial film Green Book, which Spielberg backed.

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04 Mar 22:15

'Anthem' is reportedly bricking and shutting down PS4s

by AJ Dellinger
Darendukes

what a shit show

Gamers would love to play BioWare's new loot shooter Anthem but there's one problem: the game keeps shutting off their console. A number of players have taken to Reddit and other forums to complain that Anthem appears to be plagued with an issue that...
04 Mar 19:35

Forget growing weed—make yeast spit out CBD and THC instead

by WIRED
Darendukes

neat

ROME, ITALY - FEBRUARY 15: Vendors at Canapa Mundi, an international hemp fair, on February 15, 2019 in Rome, Italy

Enlarge / ROME, ITALY - FEBRUARY 15: Vendors at Canapa Mundi, an international hemp fair, on February 15, 2019 in Rome, Italy (credit: Simona Granati - Corbis | Getty Images)

We as a species would be miserable without yeast. Baker's yeast has given us leavened bread for thousands of years. And I don’t even want to begin to imagine a world without beer and wine, which rely on yeast to convert sugar into alcohol.

Now researchers have turned to yeast to do something more improbable: manufacturing the cannabis compounds CBD and THC. By loading brewer’s yeast with genes from the cannabis plant, they’ve turned the miracle microbes into cannabinoid factories. It’s a clever scheme in a larger movement to methodically pick apart and recreate marijuana’s many compounds, to better understand the plant’s true potential.

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01 Mar 21:19

Jessica Chastain Teases a Bloody Good Time in It: Chapter 2

by James Whitbrook and Gordon Jackson
Darendukes

Shared because of the Critters TV show trailer...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBIQSjJlT_E

Alas, Lupita Nyong’o probably won’t be in Bond 25. Patton Oswalt will lend his voice to the mighty MODOK. Clark Gregg hints that Agents of SHIELD’s recent renewals will really be its last. Plus, what’s to come on the cavalcade of CW/DC TV shows, and everyone wants to rule the world in new Game of Thrones posters. To…

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01 Mar 20:27

Hellboy Gets a New Redband Trailer [Video]

by Geeks are Sexy
Darendukes

neat

A new redband trailer for the upcoming Hellboy reboot!

Hellboy – In theaters April 12, 2019. Starring David Harbour, Milla Jovovich, and Ian McShane, Sasha Lane, Penelope Mitchell, with Daniel Dae Kim.

[Lionsgate Movies]

The post Hellboy Gets a New Redband Trailer [Video] appeared first on Geeks are Sexy Technology News.

28 Feb 21:05

30 Terrible Pictures Taken By Real Estate Agents

by Justė Left

If The Weather Clears Up Later I Might Mow The Pool

If The Weather Clears Up Later I Might Mow The Pool

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Wake Up Eric, The Agent’s Here. And For Heaven’s Sake Put Some Clothes On

Wake Up Eric, The Agent’s Here. And For Heaven’s Sake Put Some Clothes On

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Attention To Detail Is Very Important. For Example, Here The Agent Has Dragged The Body Outside Before Taking The Photograph

Attention To Detail Is Very Important. For Example, Here The Agent Has Dragged The Body Outside Before Taking The Photograph

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“I Think I’m Beginning To See A Pattern” Said Holmes

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Best Make An Early Start If You Want To Reach The Sofa Before Sundown

Best Make An Early Start If You Want To Reach The Sofa Before Sundown

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A Rare Opportunity To Acquire A Sacrificial Dungeon Simply Bursting With Original Features

A Rare Opportunity To Acquire A Sacrificial Dungeon Simply Bursting With Original Features

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You’ll Never Guess What I Just Passed On The Stairs

You'll Never Guess What I Just Passed On The Stairs

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This Christmas, Turn Your House Into An Actual Advent Calendar

This Christmas, Turn Your House Into An Actual Advent Calendar

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On Cold Winter Nights There’s Nothing Quite Like Curling Up In Front Of A Roaring Toilet

On Cold Winter Nights There’s Nothing Quite Like Curling Up In Front Of A Roaring Toilet

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A Rare Chance To Own The Opening Scene From 12 Different Horror Movies

A Rare Chance To Own The Opening Scene From 12 Different Horror Movies

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Blog Idea: Reasons My Fan Is Sad

Blog Idea: Reasons My Fan Is Sad

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Let’s Be Optimistic. Perhaps It Says “Surprise My Coconut”

Let’s Be Optimistic. Perhaps It Says

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If Separated From The Mother Too Early, Young Fire Extinguishers Can Struggle To Adapt

If Separated From The Mother Too Early, Young Fire Extinguishers Can Struggle To Adapt

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Buyers Are Advised To Leave The Fridge Right Where It Is

Buyers Are Advised To Leave The Fridge Right Where It Is

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Script Idea: Marie Antoinette Travels To The 1990s And Moves In With A Monkey Pirate

Script Idea: Marie Antoinette Travels To The 1990s And Moves In With A Monkey Pirate

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That Feeling When You Enter A Bathroom And Literally Don’t Know Where To Start

That Feeling When You Enter A Bathroom And Literally Don’t Know Where To Start

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Just As It Had The Great Mayan Cities Of Tikal And Calakmul, Nature Slowly Reclaimed The Wilsons’ Dining Room

Just As It Had The Great Mayan Cities Of Tikal And Calakmul, Nature Slowly Reclaimed The Wilsons’ Dining Room

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Some People Like To Read While On The Toilet. Others Prefer To Be Inundated By Multiple Confusing And Contradictory Reflections Of Themselves, Repeating Into Infinity

Some People Like To Read While On The Toilet. Others Prefer To Be Inundated By Multiple Confusing And Contradictory Reflections Of Themselves, Repeating Into Infinity

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It’s A Tribute To My Late Wife, Who Used To Dream Of Being A Clumsily-Drawn, Questionably-Shaped Mermaid

It’s A Tribute To My Late Wife, Who Used To Dream Of Being A Clumsily-Drawn, Questionably-Shaped Mermaid

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Advice To Real Estate Agents: Never Reveal Yourself To Be The Prince Of Darkness During A Viewing

Advice To Real Estate Agents: Never Reveal Yourself To Be The Prince Of Darkness During A Viewing

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This Year, Why Not Take Some Time To Consider The Unquestionable Futility Of Existence?

This Year, Why Not Take Some Time To Consider The Unquestionable Futility Of Existence?

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“Which Biblical Scene Should We Paint On Our Livingroom Wall?” “Satan Vs. Jesus, The Arm Wrestling Competition. Has To Be”

“Which Biblical Scene Should We Paint On Our Livingroom Wall?”

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Not Yet Bernard. Feeding Time Isn’t Until 6:30

Not Yet Bernard. Feeding Time Isn’t Until 6:30

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After Days Of Waiting This Agent’s Patience Is Finally Rewarded. Weak With Thirst, A Pair Of Wild Mattresses Appear At The Watering Hole

After Days Of Waiting This Agent’s Patience Is Finally Rewarded. Weak With Thirst, A Pair Of Wild Mattresses Appear At The Watering Hole

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In Some Cultures, A Desire For Privacy Is Seen As A Sign Of Weakness

In Some Cultures, A Desire For Privacy Is Seen As A Sign Of Weakness

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Some Like It Horrible

Some Like It Horrible

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After The Great Plague Of 1665, Came The Less Famous Bubonic Bedroom Blight Of 1704

After The Great Plague Of 1665, Came The Less Famous Bubonic Bedroom Blight Of 1704

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TFW You’re Halfway Through A Wash Cycle And You Decide It Would Be Easier Just To Sell Your House

TFW You're Halfway Through A Wash Cycle And You Decide It Would Be Easier Just To Sell Your House

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The Interior Of The Millenium Falcon Was Something Of A Disappointment

The Interior Of The Millenium Falcon Was Something Of A Disappointment

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If That Thing Gets Accidentally Hoovered Up It Could Damage The Vacuum Cleaner

If That Thing Gets Accidentally Hoovered Up It Could Damage The Vacuum Cleaner

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“Have You Come To Save Us, Or To Join Us?“

“Have You Come To Save Us, Or To Join Us?“

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Reminiscent Of The Bathrooms In The Palace Of Versailles, If The Bathrooms In The Palace Of Versailles Had Been Decorated On A Tight Budget In The 1970s

Reminiscent Of The Bathrooms In The Palace Of Versailles, If The Bathrooms In The Palace Of Versailles Had Been Decorated On A Tight Budget In The 1970s

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Lucy Often Thought Back To Her Old Bedroom, Where She Spent The Happiest Years Of Her Life

Lucy Often Thought Back To Her Old Bedroom, Where She Spent The Happiest Years Of Her Life

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Hit It With Something, See If It Moves. I’ll Be Downstairs Barricading Myself Into The Kitchen

Hit It With Something, See If It Moves. I'll Be Downstairs Barricading Myself Into The Kitchen

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Drastic, But It’s Always An Option If Wood Panelling Really Isn’t Your Thing

Drastic, But It’s Always An Option If Wood Panelling Really Isn’t Your Thing

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Tommy’s Parents Waited In Vain From Him To Ask For Violin Lessons Or Join The School Chess Club

Tommy’s Parents Waited In Vain From Him To Ask For Violin Lessons Or Join The School Chess Club

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Despite His Efforts, Ivan Never Really Got The Hang Of Feng Shui

Despite His Efforts, Ivan Never Really Got The Hang Of Feng Shui

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No It’s Fine. Stay There, And You Won’t Become A Preposterous Centrepiece Of The Most Ridiculous Real Estate Photograph Ever Taken

No It’s Fine. Stay There, And You Won’t Become A Preposterous Centrepiece Of The Most Ridiculous Real Estate Photograph Ever Taken

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Early Viewing Is Recommended As There Has Already Been Considerable Interest. Mostly From Horses

Early Viewing Is Recommended As There Has Already Been Considerable Interest. Mostly From Horses

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This Bedroom Takes Its Inspiration From That Master Of Minimalist Understatement, Liberace

This Bedroom Takes Its Inspiration From That Master Of Minimalist Understatement, Liberace

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Recent Discoveries Suggest Mankind Didn’t Always Know How Sofas Worked

Recent Discoveries Suggest Mankind Didn't Always Know How Sofas Worked

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Bosworth’s Paradox Is The Name Given By Real Estate Agents To The Old Philosophical Problem Of A Door That Opens As You Close It

Bosworth's Paradox Is The Name Given By Real Estate Agents To The Old Philosophical Problem Of A Door That Opens As You Close It

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“A Narcissistic TV Evangelist? Whatever Makes You Say That Holmes?”

“A Narcissistic TV Evangelist? Whatever Makes You Say That Holmes?”

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2017 Will Be Remembered As The Year Someone Built A Pretend Wishing Well In Their Kitchen

2017 Will Be Remembered As The Year Someone Built A Pretend Wishing Well In Their Kitchen

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Lighting?

Lighting?

Perfect For Recreating The Time You Spent As A Hostage In The 1970s

Perfect For Recreating The Time You Spent As A Hostage In The 1970s

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If There’s An Opposite Of A Stairway To Heaven, I Think We’ve Found It

If There's An Opposite Of A Stairway To Heaven, I Think We've Found It

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Bovine Scarecrow Dressed As Middle Aged Woman Looking For Bovine Scarecrow Dressed As Middle Aged Man For Fun Times And Maybe More

Bovine Scarecrow Dressed As Middle Aged Woman Looking For Bovine Scarecrow Dressed As Middle Aged Man For Fun Times And Maybe More

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Winning A Year’s Supply Of Mineral Water Didn’t Bring The Unending Happiness The Erwitts Had Hoped For

Winning A Year's Supply Of Mineral Water Didn't Bring The Unending Happiness The Erwitts Had Hoped For

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Located Just A Short Walk From Literally The Edge Of The World

Located Just A Short Walk From Literally The Edge Of The World

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’round And ‘Round We Go…but Why?

'round And 'Round We Go...but Why?

Where’s The Toilet Paper?

Where’s The Toilet Paper?

That Is Quite A Light Switch…

That Is Quite A Light Switch...

Interesting Project For Enthusiastic Gardener

Interesting Project For Enthusiastic Gardener

The Stage Is Set, And The Judges Prepare To Take Their Places For One Of The More Unusual Events At This Year’s Winter Olympics

The Stage Is Set, And The Judges Prepare To Take Their Places For One Of The More Unusual Events At This Year’s Winter Olympics

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An Interesting Colour Scheme, More Often Associated With Nuclear Warning Systems

An Interesting Colour Scheme, More Often Associated With Nuclear Warning Systems

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Oh Deer….

Oh Deer....

A Rare Example Of What Architectural Historians Refer To As A “Fertility Window”

A Rare Example Of What Architectural Historians Refer To As A “Fertility Window”

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Ideal For Those Of You With A Particularly Fast Metabolism

Ideal For Those Of You With A Particularly Fast Metabolism

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Given That It’s A Trademark Characteristic Of The Undead, I Think We Should Be Concerned About Any Real Estate Agent Who Doesn’t Have A Reflection

Given That It’s A Trademark Characteristic Of The Undead, I Think We Should Be Concerned About Any Real Estate Agent Who Doesn’t Have A Reflection

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I’m Just Happy It Wasn’t Human Meat!

I'm Just Happy It Wasn't Human Meat!

Before You Invite Grandma Round, We Need To Talk Hedges

Before You Invite Grandma Round, We Need To Talk Hedges

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The Andersons Were So Proud Of Emily’s 4th Grade Scores, They Had Her Stuffed

The Andersons Were So Proud Of Emily’s 4th Grade Scores, They Had Her Stuffed

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I Spy With My Little Eye…

I Spy With My Little Eye...

One Way To Keep You From Using The Toilet During A Showing

One Way To Keep You From Using The Toilet During A Showing

I Think It’s Too Late For Just Air Freshener. That Looks Quite Established

I Think It’s Too Late For Just Air Freshener. That Looks Quite Established

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All It Needs Is A Coat Of Paint, Some Air Freshener, And Perhaps A Direct Hit From A Short Range Ballistic Missile

All It Needs Is A Coat Of Paint, Some Air Freshener, And Perhaps A Direct Hit From A Short Range Ballistic Missile

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Finished Basement, Great For Entertaining!

Finished Basement, Great For Entertaining!

Taste. The Final Frontier

Taste. The Final Frontier

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“This Is The Room Where It First Occurred To Me That My Life Was Pointless And My Career Had Been A Waste Of Time”

“This Is The Room Where It First Occurred To Me That My Life Was Pointless And My Career Had Been A Waste Of Time”

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Home Is Where The Heart Huge Inflatable Penis Is

Home Is Where The Heart Huge Inflatable Penis Is

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The Flush Mechanism Is Elaborate, Unorthodox, And Spectacular

The Flush Mechanism Is Elaborate, Unorthodox, And Spectacular

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I’m Cooking Tonight. Bring Me The Cremation Urn And Some Victorian Surgical Implements

I’m Cooking Tonight. Bring Me The Cremation Urn And Some Victorian Surgical Implements

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If You Were Crudely Rendered In Mosaic On A Bathroom Wall, You’d Be Pretty Pissed Off Too

If You Were Crudely Rendered In Mosaic On A Bathroom Wall, You’d Be Pretty Pissed Off Too

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Bullied, Neglected And Abused, Some Young Toilets Find Themselves With Nowhere To Turn

Bullied, Neglected And Abused, Some Young Toilets Find Themselves With Nowhere To Turn

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A Testament To These Austere Times, This Bathroom Is Constructed Entirely From Other Houses’ Dead Space, Overhang, And Stairwells

A Testament To These Austere Times, This Bathroom Is Constructed Entirely From Other Houses’ Dead Space, Overhang, And Stairwells

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When I Was A Child, My Favourite Fairytale Was The One About A Front Door Doomed To Gaze Down On Its Original Position From An Upstairs Window

When I Was A Child, My Favourite Fairytale Was The One About A Front Door Doomed To Gaze Down On Its Original Position From An Upstairs Window

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What Does The Fox Say? It Says “I’m The Size Of A Fully Grown Man, I Can Stand Upright, And I’m Not Even 100% Sure I’m A Fox”

What Does The Fox Say? It Says “I’m The Size Of A Fully Grown Man, I Can Stand Upright, And I’m Not Even 100% Sure I’m A Fox”

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That Way You Can Still Work On The Garden Even If It’s Raining

That Way You Can Still Work On The Garden Even If It’s Raining

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Never Rush A Photograph. Even If An Intruder Is Literally Pressed Up Against The Window Immediately Behind You

Never Rush A Photograph. Even If An Intruder Is Literally Pressed Up Against The Window Immediately Behind You

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“Yes It’s An Emergency! How Quickly Can You Get Here?“

“Yes It’s An Emergency! How Quickly Can You Get Here?“

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This Christmas, May All Your Furniture Acquire The Ability To Levitate

This Christmas, May All Your Furniture Acquire The Ability To Levitate

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If A Toilet Falls Over And There’s No-One Around To Hear It, I Dread To Think What Kind Of Noise It Makes

If A Toilet Falls Over And There’s No-One Around To Hear It, I Dread To Think What Kind Of Noise It Makes

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“Think We Could Ask Them To Rearrange Us So I’m Nearer The Window?”

“Think We Could Ask Them To Rearrange Us So I’m Nearer The Window?”

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Hence The Phrase “As Sad As A Picnic Table Without A Picnic. In A Garage

Hence The Phrase “As Sad As A Picnic Table Without A Picnic. In A Garage

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And In The Bedroom We Went For Fabrics So Bright You Can See Them With Your Eyes Closed

And In The Bedroom We Went For Fabrics So Bright You Can See Them With Your Eyes Closed

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Rex Knew He Only Had 2 Hours To Stitch Reality Back Together Again Before His Owners Got Home

Rex Knew He Only Had 2 Hours To Stitch Reality Back Together Again Before His Owners Got Home

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A Key Selling Point Of Any Modern Home: The Mirror-Mounted Sharkzooka

A Key Selling Point Of Any Modern Home: The Mirror-Mounted Sharkzooka

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The Interior Of The Millenium Falcon Was Something Of A Disappointment

The Interior Of The Millenium Falcon Was Something Of A Disappointment

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