After the optical illusions of the music video The Writing’s On the Wall (and it’s making-of), here’s the new music video of OK Go, entitled I Won’t Let You Down. This new video is no exception to the rule and reveals an amazing performance of human kaleidoscope created in a single sequence, thanks to a drone and some strange self-stabilized unicycles… A video directed by Morihiro Harano, Jun Nishida, Kazuaki Seki and Damian Kulash.

USA Ultimate has done an amazing job of turning around video highlights of the ESPN3 broadcast games after major Championship events over the last year. Yesterday, they posted a ton of great clips from the semis and finals of the showcase games.

We took the best 10, ranked them, and giffed them. Enjoy. Links to the full video are in each clip’s title.

10. Chad Larson Experience’s Blake Larson’s circus catch.

Chad Larson Experience’s Blake Larson’s circus catch.

9. Johnny Bravo’s Jimmy Mickle skies Ironside’s George Stubbs.

Jimmy Mickle skies George Stubbs

8. Drag’N Thrust’s Austin Lien hucks full field over the zone.

Austin Lien full field huck

7. Ring of Fire’s Matt Bode runs down the huck.

Ring’s Matt Bode runs down the huck.

6. Seattle Mixed’s Mark Burton snags the scoober.

Ghettobirds’ Mark Burton catches the scoober.

5. Scandal’s Sandy Jorgenson somehow gets the block.

Scandal’s Sandy Jorgensen tip block.

4. Ironside’s Josh Markette gets the filthy scoober assist.

Josh Markette scoober

3. Scandal’s Opi Payne gets the rundown layout block.

Opi Payne layout D

2. Ring of Fire’s Justin Allen’s absurd layout score.

Justin Allen huge layout grab

1. Ironside’s John Stubbs’ full extension score with George Stubbs assist.

Stubbs to Stubbs layout score

The post The Top 10 Highlights From The ESPN3 Games At Nationals, As GIFs appeared first on Ultiworld.

An infographic containing all the superhero movies announced for the coming years.

Image © ComicsAlliance (Dylan Todd) / via

Here’s a look at the third round action from the 2014 USA Ultimate National Championships.

Scoreboard

Men’s

Machine 15-14 Rhino
Sub Zero 14-12 Truck Stop
Sockeye 10-15 Ring of Fire
GOAT 13-15 Temper

Women’s

Brute Squad 15-11 Ozone
Schwa 11-9 Capitals
Riot 15-6 Green Means Go
Nightlock 12-14 Heist
Fury 15-7 Underground
Traffic 13-12 Showdown
Scandal 15-14 Molly Brown
Nemesis 15-12 Tabby Rosa

Mixed

Drag’N Thrust 14-9 D’Oh Abides
Slow White 5-11 Santa Maria
CLX 13-11 AMP
7 Figures 11-13 Cosa Nostra

Men’s Division

POOL B

Chicago Machine (#2) v. Portland Rhino (#7)

The 1/2 matchup in Pool B went to double game point on a hot, gusty afternoon, but instead of an exciting battle to determine the top spot, it was a Machine victory 14-13 to deny Rhino a first day win, after Chicago had locked up the pool the game before.

It was a loose matchup; that style seemed to favor Rhino in nearly all aspects. Early in the game, Chicago — running a clam to stop Rhino’s early huck looks and then transitioning to tight man after a few throws — was able to pressure Portland into making a few mistakes.

Machine was guaranteed the first place position regardless, but also seemed to want to keep the victories rolling for their momentum. Their second defensive line snagged a few breaks, as their first defensive line alternated playing O points with the standard group. No player for Machine sat, but the playing time was distributed to the deep squad.

Machine built a 5-3 lead.

As the points grew longer, however, and the play grew more physical with multiple turnovers coming from both squads, Rhino seemed to relax. The Portland squad wanted the game more, it was clear, fighting for their first win; they took a break back.

Machine claimed half 8-5, but Rhino brought the intensity and started to get fired up as they mounted a comeback. Rhino broke three times out of half to tie the game at 8.

From there on out, the game got tight as both groups traded; Rhino was louder, more physical on the defense, and playing hard, while Machine was throwing a mix of zone and man and seemed indecisive. The standard O-line for Chicago kept playing, every other offensive point or so, but was definitely a step or two slower. They weren’t fully committed to winning, but didn’t seem to want to let the game go either.

In the end, it went down to double game point, Machine receiving, going downwind. The team worked it down to the endzone before Rhino got a layout d to extend the game. Machine got another chance on a throwaway, but then another block from Rhino gave them a final shot. They hucked upwind, but Machine claimed it with a sky D. Eventually, Bob Liu put up a big, 25 yard scoober into the breakside of the endzone for the win.

Machine goes 3-0 and will face Ring of Fire in prequarters, a team that has had a disappointing Nationals thus far. Chicago has a shot an old rival (Ring knocked Machine out of Nationals two years ago), while Rhino will have yet another big match against Sockeye.

Minneapolis Sub Zero (#11) v. Washington DC Truck Stop (#14)

The game was back and forth throughout, in a major upwind-downwind fight, but Sub Zero was able to win on hard cap, 14-12.

Sub Zero, wearing tights on the hot turf field, started off going upwind on offense and was broken to begin the game.

The first half was mostly downwind trading. Both teams had a few chances, with Sub Zero seeming to have slightly more opportunities, but they kept coming up short, with turns inside or very close to the upwind endzone. Sub’s defensive offense is just not as clean as their O-line counterparts; the vertical stack seems to creep in, swings are far more difficult, and drops and throwaways seem to pop up and kill the movement at the worst moments.

“We struggled to get pressure going defensively in the first half,” said Charlie Reznikoff. “We needed a switch in strategy and matchups.”

The answer was in part simple; Sub will create a hybrid line about three or four times a game, seeing players like Johnson and Lindsley getting into defensive points after timeouts. These, according to team leaders, almost always garnered a break.

Sub Zero did just this as the end of the first half drew closer; Eric Johnson threw an upwind goal to put the squad up 7-6.

Sub loaded up a line again, ready to take the downwind and half, but Truck had other plans. D.C. answered with an upwind huck to get it back, Markham Shofner connecting with Chris Kocher, and then Truck scored a quick downwinder after Simon Montague floated a break throw.

Truck led 8-7 at half.

It was the strategic shift after half for Sub Zero that made the difference. “We started disrupting the cutting lanes and messing with the mark,” explained Reznikoff.

Sub was flashing in the lane and generally confusing the D.C. offense through poaches, and this forced several Truck miscues, leading to a few throwaways and drops. If Truck’s huck game, in particular, wasn’t clicking, they really struggled. Sub Zero reeled off three in a row, taking an 11-9 lead, and the teams traded downwind points from there, Sub Zero winning on softcap 14-12.

Though they’ll likely see the number one seed overall, Revolver, down the road in the bracket, Sub said that didn’t play into their main thoughts. It was easier for them to just play to win, rather than game the system.

“We’re still trying to get better,” said Reznikoff simply.

Sub Zero will face GOAT in prequarters tomorrow. Truck Stop will face regional rival Temper.

POOL C

Toronto GOAT (#10) v. Pittsburgh Temper (#15)

If anyone was still unsure after they beat Ring of Fire and stayed with Sockeye to 8-8, here’s the scoop: Temper is for real.

The gritty four seed underscored that point in their last round of pool play as they ground out a hard win against GOAT 15-13.

Serious upwind/downwind conditions made breaks hard to come by but Temper got one early when Eddie Peters hit Carl Morgenstern up line. Then Pitt completed the downwinder to go up 4-2. Those two goals carried palpable importance and it was no surprise when Temper took half 8-6.

GOAT’s D line was completely unable to work the disc going into the wind in the first half but the second half was different. Toronto broke upwind, then they completed the break after Mark Lloyd got The Foot Block Heard Around Frisco on Pat Earles, (GOAT handler Adrian Yearwood picked up the disc and told the observer it was split and had to be replaced). Tied at 8s.

The game would stay on serve with both teams only scoring downwind until Morgenstern, who already had a big upwind hustle play in the Ring game, caught a layout upwind break from Mark Fedorenko to end the game.

Toronto had a couple sniffs at the upwind end zone in the second half, including a great scoring chance at 10-10 which was probably the turning point.

Temper’s Tyler Degirolamo called a timeout after catching a huck a yard or so outside the downwind end zone. A great defensive stand by GOAT gets things going the other way. Toronto works it a bit and takes a strong deep shot to Morgan Hibbert up wind who steps out and throws a low backhand that floats just over the hand of Trevor Henry for what would have been the go ahead goal.

Temper held as Alex Thorne hit his brother Max on an absolute dime. The Canadians had a similar opportunity after a huck at 12-12 but a swing pass was rushed and zipped out of bounds.

Since Temper was receiving with the wind every time all they had to do was keep scoring. They did a nice job of not monkeying with it on their end of the field.

“We just tried to play smart D strategically and get great field position more times,” said Max Thorne racked up four goals and three assists. “We were making sure we had no turnovers near the upwind end zone, getting it downwind, and from there just playing lock down defense.”

Toronto was ready for some punting by the Pitt O line but when the deep look was covered Pittsburgh did a great job of hitting big in cut gainers.
It’s no secret that Temper’s roster is stacked with college talent. The counterpoint to them playing at the club level is exactly that – COLLEGE talent. Well, it’s not college talent anymore. This is club talent.

“We had some bad reviews, saying were going to be outmatched. We just had fire,” Max Thorne said. “We really want to win and that’s what we’re doing.”

Temper will rematch against Truck Stop tomorrow morning in prequarters; GOAT will face Sub Zero.

Seattle Sockeye (#3) v. Raleigh Ring of Fire (#5)

Ring of Fire got their first win of the weekend against Seattle Sockeye, 15-10, but it didn’t mean much. Sockeye had already clinched the one seed, and nothing Ring did could help them climb out of the basement of the pool. Both teams rested starters.

Women’s Division

POOL A

Boston Brute Squad (#1) v. Atlanta Ozone (#8)

There was little rhythm in this third round meeting between top-seed Boston Brute Squad and Atlanta Ozone. The wind blew to a point where upwind scores became scarce for both teams, but Brute held on during the long points they needed, and pulled out a gritty 15-11 win.

Early in the game, the Boston women snuck in two straight scores, first against the wind, and then with it. Both teams pulled out full zone defenses, with Ozone frustrating the Boston handler core using a 4-person cup that left Brute cutters stranded and handlers frustrated. Points in the first half dragged on and on as turns became more of a problem -even well-timed swings were grazing fingertips and tailing away.

Sheer grit gave Brute squad the edge in this game, and they received big contributions from many of their stars, including Emily Baecher and Leila Tunnel. Becky Malinowski was able to hang onto floating throws for Brute as well, and may have given Brute the edge they needed. This was their first real test here in the post season, and if the win continues, other contenders in the top four will take note, and Brute could face some unexpected challenges.

Portland Schwa (#12) vs. Toronto Capitals (#13)

The game between Pool A’s two bottom seeds was critical for both, as avoiding the peril of the bottom seed can be the difference between a quarterfinals spot and a prequarters exit. The Toronto team went up in the first half, taking an 8-6 lead. But Schwa, as they’ve shown a propensity to do, fought back in the second half and clawed their way to an 11-9 victory to secure the third spot in Pool A.

POOL B

Seattle Riot (#2) vs. Philadephia Green Means Go (#14)

Seattle Riot completed an impressive undefeated start to their nationals, cruising to a healthy victory over Philadelphia Green Means Go. The 15-6 score tells you all you need to know. The question is if the easy Thursday will have them out of sorts when it comes to tough and intense bracket competition.

San Francisco Nightlock (#7) vs. Madison Heist (#11)

Both teams have shown themselves capable of both great and weak play during this season, and the rematch of their Colorado Cup game was an exciting as billed. Heist had both Robyn Wiseman and Georgia Bosscher this time around, making for a much different quality of play than what Nightlock had faced at Colorado, where they lost 12-11. Despite excellent play from Bree Cahn, Heist muscled their way to a 14-12 victory and the women’s division’s first upset.

Coming out of half with an 8-6 lead, Heist scored the opening upwinder to add another point to the San Francisco hole. Wiseman and Bosscher’s ability to huck upwind caused trouble for Nightlock throughout the game, and Wiseman continues to be one of the division’s most impactful onfield forces; she recorded 2 goals and 2 assists in the game. Nightlock seemed poised to make a run when a massive Heather Waugh layout block set up an upwind break to make it 11-9.

Both teams clearly felt the pressure and exhaustion of the day in the second half. Between them both, there were 18 first half turnovers and 41 second half turnovers. Long grinding points became common and each felt more and more crucial to the end result.

But the comeback was not to be. Nightlock had trouble converting upwind chances and Heist seemed to win the majority of the long hard points. Bree Cahn was everywhere, with 3 goals and 3 blocks in the second half, including two key handblocks. It was not enough and Heist completed the upset on a downwinder.

POOL C

Vancouver Traffic (#6) vs. Austin Showdown (#10)

In a windy and sloppy round three brawl, Traffic and Showdown went head to head. Showdown took the early lead, landing the first big blows. But Traffic fought back in the second half. Vancouver broke upwind on the final point to defeat Showdown, fighting off the upset and winning 13-12.

Zone was the weapon of choice for both teams and Showdown used it to great effect early on. Tina Woodings was the acting command in the deep space, directing her teammates into optimal positions and denying options to Vancouver. Mariel Hammond marshalled the troops on offense and drove Showdown to an 8-4 halftime lead.

Traffic found their rhythm in the second half, but when soft cap went on at 11-9, they still had quite a hill to climb. The consistently spectacular Catherine Hui had a few miscues, but the play of Ashlee Davison and Terri Whitehead were critical for Vancouver. Showdown took some aggressive deep shots that were carried too far in the wind and their opponents made pay for being so generous with possession. That theme bled into the final point, when an overthrown downwind deep shot to a wide open receiver set up Traffic to go the other way, gain field position, and eventually score after a short field turn. The victor gives Traffic the chance to go undefeated and win Pool C if they can upset Fury next round.

San Francisco Fury (#3) vs. Seattle Underground (#15)

After a close first half, Fury opened the game up. Controlling the second half and the pace, the three seed was able to dominate and close out a 15-7 victory.

POOL D

Washington D.C. Scandal (#4) vs. Denver Molly Brown (#5)

As perhaps the most highly anticipated game of pool play in the women’s division, the match-up between Washington D.C. Scandal and Denver Molly Brown did not disappoint. Coming back from a 10-6 deficit in swirling gusts, the defending champs once again displayed their indefatigable grit and won on double game point, 15-14, despite pulling upwind.

Some tight downfield defense paved the way for an Alicia White run-through D on the final point, about 30 yards out of the endzone. Only a few passes later, Anne Mercier would put up a trailing inside-out flick to Sandy Jorgensen.

The tension as Jorgensen and her defender followed the floating disc was thick.

Two hands rose up, but it was Jorgensen’s that came down with the disc, as the Scandal star managed to toe the line and secure her team the victory. Scandal wasted no time in rushing the field.

The win gave DC top honors in pool D and the opportunity to play the bottom seed of pool A tomorrow morning. Molly Brown, meanwhile, takes the second spot and will have to play the third place team of pool A in prequarters.

As for the two squads’ showcase faceoff, despite Denver leading for much of the game, no squad ever had a solid stronghold in the contest. At any point in time, it appeared as though either team could make a run and take it.

Molly Brown notched the first break to go up 2-1 but would soon give it back. It wasn’t until their late run before the half that would give Denver the 8-6 lead at the break, set to receive.

A 2-0 run out of half made it 10-6, and for a brief instant it looked like Molly Brown might run away with it.

That was the moment Scandal really ramped up their offensive attack, and most of all, their dump defense.

Despite excellent handler work from Denver’s Claire Chastain, Molly Brown would often have to earn their resets the hard way. Such an occurrence cut down on their often smooth continuation cuts.

Scandal used these turns to their advantage, often with Octavia Payne running to pick up the disc off a fresh turnover and ripping it to a streaking Jorgensen. One particular instance saw Payne putting up a trust huck to Jorgensen, who at that time was a few steps behind two defenders, only to see her blow by both opponents for the score.

Molly Brown had no answer for Jorgensen’s dominant athleticism.

Washington D.C. would earn a break back to make it 10-8, before both teams traded holds amidst a fair amount of turns.

At 13-11, however, Scandal went on a mini-run to make it 13-13. Though Molly Brown would score the next one on a huge sky by Tina Snodgrass over Jorgensen in the endzone, they looked less confident as a unit in the final points. It cost them dearly.

Scandal would go on to punch in the final two points and solidify the impressive comeback.

Molly Brown’s offense looked smooth and flowing for much of the game, but they’ll need to figure out a way to stay aggressive down the stretch against elite opponents if they expect to make a deep run this weekend.

Chicago Nemesis (#9) vs. Florida Tabby Rosa (#16)

The battle for the third spot in Pool D was an exciting one where both teams were in it the whole way through. It was the surprise 16^th seed from Florida who caught Nemesis off guard, recovering from some early mistakes to take a 4-3 lead. However, Nemesis brought it back even and took half 8-6. Tabby didn’t fold and fought in the second half, but Chicago used their grit to fend off the feisty Floridians. An exceptionally patient zone O point for Chicago put them up 14-11 and essentially sealed the deal. They went on to win 15-12.

Mixed Division

POOL B

Minneapolis Drag’N Thrust (#2) v. Seattle D’Oh Abides (#11)

Defending National champion Drag’N Thrust got off to a strong start against the Northwest top qualifier D’OH Abides with an easy 14-9 win in their first game of this year’s Nationals.

Boston Slow White (#7) v. Columbus Santa Maria (#14)

Santa Maria started their Nationals campaign red hot, with a big upset win over the top Northeast team, Slow White. Columbus closed out a dominant 11-5 win by simply playing better in the windy conditions.

POOL C

Ames Chad Larson Experience (#3) v. Philadelphia AMP (#10)

AMP looks much improved from earlier in the season, but CLX still came out on top 13-11 in this first round for each team.

Los Angeles 7 Figures (#6) v. Austin Cosa Nostra (#15)

Cosa Nostra played well on Texas turf to upset 7 Figures 13-11.

The post Round 3 Recap: 2014 National Championships, Presented By Savage Ultimate appeared first on Ultiworld.

Like a best friend, only badder.

Welcome, hero. Brought to you by Central City’s newest hero: The Flash — Series Premiere Tuesday, October 7 at 8|7c on The CW.

The CW / Via image-cdn.zap2it.com

The “Judging America” series by American photographer Joel Parés, a former U.S Marine who decided to challenge our prejudices and stereotypes with portrait diptychs. Harvard graduates, CEOs of major companies, nurses and veterans are transformed into gangsters, strippers, drug dealers, homeless or undocumented immigrants, pointing the easy judgments based on profession, ethnicity or sexual orientation…

Images © Joel Parés / via

This graphic from Sludge Brown is a great visual representation of the Nationals field by region:

The post Photo Of The Day: Nationals Edition appeared first on Ultiworld.

We know who you REALLY are.

We might be “playing,” but this isn’t a game.

The WB / Fox / Warner Bros. / Marvel / New Line Cinema

Hello, Kitty?

Ain’t no party like a Stars Hollow party ! Slight spoilers ahead if you haven’t seen the series…yet.

Because you get to experience the cozy glory of Luke's Diner again.

CW / homeofthenutty.com

Michel's attitude should be everyone's attitude.

CW / icyg.tumblr.com

Now you'll remember how hard it was being the new kid at school.

CW / homeofthenutty.com

BECAUSE FIRST KISSES ARE AWKWARD.

CW / homeofthenutty.com

View Entire List ›

When a creative dad has fun creating some amazing illustrations with pancakes for his son, with a little food coloring and a lot of talent. Some beautiful culinary creations in line with “Jim’s Pancakes“!

Images via / via

Sure, you hate parties and small talk. But to what degree?

Bill Nye The Science Guy catching a disc in an ultimate game.

I just returned from the 40^thCornell Ultimate Reunion and was lucky to meet and interview Bill Nye the Science Guy.  Bill was a member of the first Cornell Buds, a team that was started by Jon Cohn of Maplewood, New Jersey in 1973.  Jon graduated from Columbia High School and brought the sport he learned in the NJ parking lot to the Dust Bowl of Cornell’s University Halls. Bill learned all he could from Jon and eventually brought his talents west to Seattle.

1. He played Frisbee Football before Ultimate.

Bill grew up throwing a Pluto Platter (a really old disc with planets in a ring around the center) with his older brother and played “Frisbee Football” when he was growing up in D.C. “I was comfortable throwing a disc around,” and when he saw Jon teaching the game, “I just wanted to be part of it.  I understood it instantly.”

2. One of his fond memories is playing under the lights in Amherst. 

Bill recalls the Cornell team playing on a lit field at UMass. “It was Halloween. The grass was damp and it was under the lights. It was just exciting to play at night.  We are playing a professional sport, man, under the lights!”

3. He founded the Olympic Windjammers, the first men’s team in Seattle.

After graduation from Cornell, he took a job with Boeing in Everett, Washington.  He joined an already thriving disc scene, headed by Mary Lowry and Jeff Jorgenson, and was a founder and captain of the Windjammers. “I was captain because I had a phone. I had a phone at home. A landline, as we call it now. And an answering machine. And a pencil and a pen and paper.  I had all that technology.”

Bill Nye signing a disc for some Cornell Roses players.

4. He was a part of the early Seattle vs. Portland rivalry.

The Windjammers’ main competition was the Dark Star of Portland, a team that ruled the Northwest in the late seventies. They also traveled to Santa Barbara and Vancouver and once flew in two private planes piloted by friends from Boeing.  “We played a lot in the rain and the mud in Seattle.” They also played halftime shows in the King Dome for the Seattle Sounders.

5. He had some serious ultimate injuries.

Bill suffered a dislocated shoulder, which “has never really been the same” and a broken nose while playing, one that he believed to be retaliatory for an earlier play.

6. He remembers the old rules.

When Bill started playing, the stall count was 15 and then 12 and then 10. The playing field was 60 yards long but he likes our current dimensions. He added, “The Callahan is after my time . . .it’s a good rule.”

7. Why he likes ultimate as a player.

“It’s just an elegant game. You have your disc skills with your hand and you are running like crazy, which I respect. . . The frisbee is just more interesting to watch fly than a ball, and I love baseball.”

8. Why he likes ultimate as a scientist.

Bill Nye on Ultimate Frisbee from a scientific perspective 

9. He likes the idea of professional Ultimate.

Bill now lives in New York City  and has never seen a pro game. “I will definitely go to the games. Because what I have always imagined is the game would be just that much more rigorous.  Just a little bit. Everyone has to keep his/her foot on the line ‘til the pull is pulled. I guess they have referees . . .I’m the guy that got his nose broken and I would like that to be disciplined.”

10. He’s not concerned about the commercialization of the sport.

“No. That will help the sport.  I have anti-concern.”

Some members of the founding Cornell ultimate team. From left to right: Bill Nye, Joe Reina, Chip O’Lari, Jon Cohn, Karl Barth, Toby Lou, Don Eibsen.

11. He deeply appreciates his parents and his time at Cornell.

“My parents both worked so hard to get me into Cornell and pay for it, it’s amazing. I don’t want to shock anybody who might have a long memory at the university. I am sure it was a clerical error that got me into Cornell. It changed my life. Cornell made me who I am.”

Why was your admission to Cornell an error? “Because the people were so freakin’ smart! What am I doing here?”

12. He played some serious ultimate at the reunion game.

For the record, Bill played more points than any of his contemporaries this weekend. He came to the sideline after his first few points and said, “This is still the best game. It’s just the best game.”

He further elaborates below. You will also hear his original take on Spirit and his suggestion for replacing the word, “assist.”

Bill Nye on his love of ultimate.

Bill Nye throwing a forehand.

Bill spent the weekend reminiscing with old friends, meeting the new iterations of Cornell ultimate players, and taking lots of selfies. He usually writes “Bill Nye the Science Guy” when he gives an autograph. I asked him what he wrote on all of the discs he signed. This weekend he wrote either “Flying discs ARE SCIENCE!!” or “Bill Nye 1973.”

He was exuberant and curious and delighted in the connections he found between the past and current generations, and could not have been more accommodating or gracious.

He was — in every respect — Bill Nye the Ultimate Guy.

Photo credit: Jim Gaarder
Film credit: Louie Cohn
Special thanks: Jon Cohn

The post 12 Things You Didn’t Know About Bill Nye, The Ultimate Guy appeared first on Ultiworld.

A little Japanese gadget that will let you turn your toasts into adorable little bears… Cuteness overdose!

Images © Tokyu Hands / via

Spirit circles work better when you don’t point guns at the people in the middle.

The United Nations will begin deploying ultimate-style observers across the globe this week in an effort to mediate conflicts and restore some semblance of spirit to the game we call civilization. The move comes in response to a stunning proliferation of violence, catastrophe, and human rights violations, seemingly worldwide.

UN Secretary General Ban Ki-moon spoke this morning, to address what has become known as the Global Crisis of Spirit: “In light of recent events, I’ve decided to call a ‘Spirit Foul’ on the entire world. Everyone, everywhere is completely out of control.

“For decades we’ve insisted that our system of diplomacy can work—that nations and groups all over the world can resolve their conflicts through discourse in an increasingly peaceful effort toward a global community. But the world seems to be most united right now in its wholesale rejection of that notion. Something needs to change, because every little border dispute or bad pick call seems to blow up into an all-out disaster.”

The UN will send observers to “pretty much every fucking corner of the planet,” according to Secretary Ban, who, for justification, cited the daily violence between Israel and Palestine, and the increasing reach and brutal tactics of ISIS, as well as Ebola; Malaria; AIDS; the conflicts in Syria, South Sudan, and Ukraine; the drug war in Mexico; the militarization of US police; Chinese pollution; Indian waste management; climate change; poaching of endangered animals; Nicky Minaj; endocrine disruptors; net neutrality; PRISM; indefinite detention; and the nearly inevitable extinction of the human race by nuclear bombs or weaponized smallpox—not to mention the cosmic mundanity of an asteroid impact if we don’t hurry the hell up and get off this rock to diversify our habitat.

The Secretary looked like he was having a bad month.

As part of the plan, USA Ultimate will partner with Ultimate Peace in a joint effort to help train UN observers in player-initiated conflict resolution, and on how to mediate some of the trickiest calls in the global game. USAU expects a bit of a learning curve.

“Some calls, obviously, are much easier to negotiate than others,” said Dr. Tom Crawford, CEO of USA Ultimate, at a press conference on the partnership. “The other week, for instance, the World Health Organization called a travel on Ebola, and CNN just went totally overboard, even though they never saw the original violation. Pretty straightforward; if you don’t know what you’re talking about, don’t get involved.

“On the other hand, look at Ferguson, Missouri, where we’re learning pretty quickly that it’s difficult to call ‘foul’ when you’re choking on tear gas. When can an observer step in?”

“Or take our area of expertise,” added Jennifer Burney, President of Ultimate Peace, who also spoke at the conference. “Israel called ‘Disc Space’ back in the ‘40s, but the Palestinians have always maintained that they had already established legal marking position on Jerusalem. Almost every nation out there has tried to call ‘Best Perspective.’ But at this point it’s pretty much too late to just send it back. It’s time for an experienced observer to step in and mediate.”

While the full timetable for deployment of observers is unclear, the UN says that the first groups will be sent out Friday, probably to somewhere in the Middle East, Southern or Eastern Asia, the Americas, Northern Africa, Europe, Sub-Saharan Africa, or Australia. To quote Secretary Ban, “It’s basically intramural atrocity out there; chaos.  No wonder so many people are dumping buckets of ice-water on themselves just to feel like they can make a difference.  Actually, you know what, that sounds like a good idea. Somebody get me a bucket!”

“And make sure I’m still Facebook friends with Kim Jong-un!”

Later in the morning, President Barack Obama expressed US support for the UN’s efforts, commenting publicly from his apparently offensive vacation on Martha’s Vineyard:

“Let us hope that these observers can be a push back against those who would do harm to the innocents of the world, and a step forward toward the change our Earth so desperately needs. Because after each bombing, mass slaughter, and blatant oppression of human rights, the spirit circle is just starting to feel a little disingenuous.”

In the immediate wake of the announcement of the UN plan, concerns spread over whether the UN should call in observers or referees, the latter being preferred by the MLU and AUDL as game officials.  But Michelle Kondracki, general manager of MLU’s New York Rumble, called the controversy a “non-issue.”

“When it comes down to it, what matters first is getting some sort of impartial official out there,” said Kondracki.  “Bickering over what we call them or the exact extent of their powers seems somehow petty, when you think about the beheading of innocents.  Hopefully the observers can teach the world about de-escalation and about giving each other the benefit of the doubt.  Oh, and also about positioning after a pick, ’cause I’m still not convinced anyone really knows the rule.”

Critics of the UN’s plan complain that with the deployment of all observers to handle international crises, the decay of ultimate is assured.  Arguing that the motive underlying bad calls is usually a desire for an unfair advantage, these critics offer many a ruined game or an undeserved loss as proof of the inevitable death of Spirit and sportsmanship.

Others, however, like Ironside Captain George Stubbs, contend that the naysayers need to “chill out and get some perspective.”

“When the worst part of your weekend can still be solved by contest or no contest and send it back,” said Stubbs, “when the worst thing the other guy can do to you is make a bad travel call…well, you’re doing a lot better than most of the planet.”

The post Whole Planet Could Use Observers Right About Now appeared first on Ultiworld.

In God We Crust.

Justin Abarca for BuzzFeed

Time for some real talk.

Sure, we are all Groot — but when it comes to who’s on top in Marvel’s weirdest movie, there can be only one. Warning: Spoilers for Guardians of the Galaxy ahead!

Thanos

Performed by: Josh Brolin

Strengths: Super evil, has a nifty space throne, father to multiple resentful adopted, augmented daughters.

Weaknesses: Guardians of the Galaxy is blissfully free of most obligations toward laying groundwork for future Marvel installments, but Thanos really doesn't have much to do in the movie other than remind us that he'll eventually be coming down the pike as a Big Bad.

Marvel Studios

Nova Prime Irani Rael

Played by: Glenn Close

Strengths: In charge of Xandar's Nova Corps, and played by Glenn goddamn Close. Also, she has quite the futuristic updo — what is even going on there?

Weaknesses: Only there to deliver typical (space) police chief lines.

Marvel Studios

Korath the Pursuer

Played by: Djimon Hounsou

Strengths: Pursuing. Also has neat eyes and head implants, and gets to complete one of the movie's best ongoing jokes regarding Peter Quill's would-be outlaw name, Star-Lord.

Weaknesses: In the end, Korath is just one of Ronan's lackeys.

Marvel Studios

Kraglin

Played by: Sean Gunn

Strengths: Director James Gunn's brother Sean was an offscreen MVP during Guardians of the Galaxy's filming, so it's only fitting that he get a small but memorable on-screen part as Yondu Udonta's first mate.

Weaknesses: It may be inspired by his boss's biomechanical head fin, but that hairstyle's just not flattering.

Marvel Studios

View Entire List ›

I am Groot.

Marvel Studios / Thinkstock / James Grebey / Via zap2it.com

Will you be strapping on a seashell bra?

Disney

The brilliant idea of the day: edible chocolate LEGO Bricks ! The Japanese designer Akihiro Mizuuchi has indeed built molds allowing him to create perfectly functional chocolate LEGO bricks, which can be linked together to make some cute and delicious creations! I love it…

Images © Akihiro Mizuuchi / via

“8-bit Matrix“, when a Youtuber has fun to replace the sound effects, dialogues and sounds of the Matrix movies with 8-bit sounds from retro video games…

The world is yours for the taking.

Lionel Royer / Via i.imgur.com

“Man the boundaries, protect us, do your duty to our school!” —Professor McGonagall

God, you’re such a pie.

Thinkstock

Cowabunga, dudes! Take our quiz to find out which hero on a half-shell you actually are! And be sure to check out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles — in theaters Friday, August 8.

Paramount Pictures

Check out Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles — in theaters Friday, August 8.

youtube.com

Reddit user DruishPrincess69 wanted beautiful pictures of his pregnant wife by a professional photographer, to keep great memories of pregnancy… But his wife refused to pose on the pictures, so he decided to replace her by using the most classic pregnant woman photography poses and clichés…

Images © DruishPrincess69