Shared posts

10 Dec 05:00

Small Moon

Denise

This would be the kind of thing to bring down a Rebellion.

GENERAL JAN DODONNA: An analysis of the plans provided by Princess Leia has reinvigorated the arguments of the 'artificial moonlet' and 'rogue planet-station' camps. I fear this question is fracturing the Rebellion.
25 Nov 08:00

strip for November / 25 / 2014 - Daily Protection Money

Denise

Yep. And a tiny little mobster that I ADORE.

01 Dec 04:41

Food and Consequences

Denise

We now know the true reason cats are assholes - they just want our coffee, beer, and pizza!

sleep is dumb

Tonight's comic is about sharing.

19 Nov 01:17

She's Met Her Match

Denise

I AM SO METAL.

19 Nov 05:00

November 19, 2014

Denise

BWAHAHA!


If you want a Science book in a hurry, they're on amazon!
11 Nov 21:55

Outside Voice: The Pain of Wanting to Protect My Daughter's Spirit and Knowing I Really Can't

by Anonymous Guest Blogger
Denise

Wow. WOW. Yes, yes, yes. Hits home a bit hard for me.

Outside Voice is a series of stories by anonymous writers who need a safe space to share them. The following piece was written by a friend and reader of Schmutzie.com, and I am honoured to publish her story here.


When I got pregnant the first time, I didn't know the kind of pain I was in for.

by Milan Nykodym, Czech Republic [CC-BY-SA-2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

by Milan Nykodym, Czech Republic [CC-BY-SA-2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

I knew, of course, that pregnancy could be awful and that labour and delivery would surely be no picnic. Then there's the whole recovery and getting used to looking after a baby thing, which can be so, so, awful. And that's just with your standard, no complications, pregnancy and labour. There are so many things that can pile on top of that.

When my daughter was in kindergarten, she had HSP, which is an over active immune reaction. She was in pain for months, with bruising  all over her legs and lower back and swelling in her joints. There was a period where she couldn't eat or walk. I carried her from place to place, any movement that jarred her legs causing her to cry. She spent some time in hospital on anti-nausea drugs while drinking Ensure, because she'd lost five of her thirty-five pounds. We had to take her to specialists to make sure her liver was still functioning. We were thrilled when she was able to keep food down, and cheered when she actually requested to eat. My heart broke a hundred times a day for her.

There is an entirely different pain though, that comes with children.

She likes to tuck her pants into her socks because she finds the feel of them moving against her legs as she walks irritating.

"Some girls at school told me ten things that I should do to avoid being bullied. They said I need to get new clothes. I like my clothes though.  I decided I don't want to do any of them, because then I wouldn't be me anymore."

Now in grade four, my baby's mind wanders. She is easily distracted, she has big emotions and huge reactions. She is not great with transitions, which there are a lot of at school. She assumes that everyone she meets is a friend, and she's not great at picking up cues that maybe they aren't.

"Mummy?"

"Yeah?"

"What does 'spaz' mean?"

"In what context?"

"Well, some kids at school called me that today. And no one would tell me what it meant."

She reads two novels a day, and she has trouble pulling herself out of a book with no warning. She takes forever to get ready to go anywhere. She doesn't always have the best sense of time and doesn't realise that she's been doing something for an hour if there are no visual cues. She gets frustrated when people don't understand what she is saying, and that can lead to temper tantrums. All of this also causes trouble at school.

by nerissa's ring (Flickr: girl, lost) [CC-BY-2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

by nerissa's ring (Flickr: girl, lost) [CC-BY-2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

And I'm torn. I understand the dilemma of her teachers. I really do. You can't focus all your attention on one kid out of 25. You can't take time out from your day to deal with frustrations and tantrums. You can't be everywhere at once. You can't stop kids from saying hurtful things when you're not around. I understand all that.

That doesn't make it better when my child is in tears telling me that her classmates laughed at her. Or that they've started calling her something new and she doesn't know what it means either.

"They don't do it in front of the teachers, Mummy. I guess they don't want them to hear it."

 She has been tested, and the verdict was that she does not have ADHD. She does not have enough of the markers to be diagnosed with Aspergers. She is Gifted, with a Learning Disability.  What does any of this mean? It means that her classmates think she is weird and don't hesitate to tell her so. 

"Sometimes, I feel like they want to wash their hands after they work with me."

This is the pain I wasn't prepared for. The pain of wanting to protect my daughter's spirit, and knowing that I really can't. I want to help her fit in so that her days will be easier, but I worry that in fitting in, she will be losing parts of her that make her who she is. I worry that, as I did, she might strive so hard to fit in that she'll realise one day she doesn't know who she is. 

If I'm being entirely honest, her fitting in would also make my life easier. I wouldn't have to sit with an understanding face on while I listen to her tell me about these things. I wouldn't have to try to come up with the reasoned, calm reactions that I hope to model for her to emulate, while inside I'm crying for her and raging at the kids who think that treating someone this way is alright. My heart breaks for them, too, since I really don't believe that this kind of behaviour comes out of nowhere. I wouldn't be sitting at home after a phone call with a teacher who seems more interested in making her conform than in finding ways to work with her differences.  

"You know what, Mummy? If everyone was the same, there would never be any inventions, or good stories. I'm glad I'm different."

I also struggle, because in a world where children laugh at one another's struggles, or judge them for the way they wear their pants, I don't really want my kid to fit in. I'm glad that she is strong enough to understand that different is good, and kindness is always best, and I hope with all my heart that she manages to stay that way.

In a world where a teacher assures me that "the kids are really great with her" because they are learning to ignore a person, instead of learning to understand that everyone is different in their own way, I don't want to fit in either.


I'm taking part in NaBloPoMo, National Blog Posting Month, during which I am publishing a blog post every single day during the month of November.

Check out the NaBloPoMo blogroll.

13 Nov 14:41

Allons-y Alonzo!

Denise

Click through - it's bigger on the inside, and made of LEGO!

keyboard shortcuts: previous photo next photo L view in light box F favorite < scroll film strip left > scroll film strip right ? show all shortcuts

03 Nov 05:00

Chemistry

Denise

Sarah, have you not seen this?

These are all sans-serif compounds. Serif compounds are dramatically different and usually much more reactive.
31 Oct 03:25

The Real Sonic Screwdriver

sleep is dumb

Tonight’s comic is about the REAL Sonic Screwdriver

20 Oct 04:00

Orb Hammer

Denise

This is kind of what I deal with when I talk with people about data preservation "Well, it IS preserved but no one needs to know anything about it! Or even ever see it!"

Ok, but make sure to get lots of pieces of rock, because later we'll decide to stay in a room on our regular orb and watch hammers hold themselves and hit rocks for us, and they won't bring us very many rocks.
03 Oct 15:13

They say that water cannot be created or destroyed

All artwork and content on this site is Copyright © 2014 Matthew Inman. Please don't steal.

TheOatmeal.com was lovingly built using CakePHP

26 Sep 01:29

Behind the Curve

sleep is dumb

Thanks to the magic of time dilation, tonight’s comic is a little early.

26 Sep 01:23

Scritch Scritch Scritch

Denise

SQUEEEEEEEEE!
(Marten if you F this one up I will enter the QC universe and give you a world of hurt!)

21 Aug 07:00

strip for August / 21 / 2014 - The Thoop Sells It

05 Sep 18:01

Worrisome uses of quotation marks

pedanticromantic:

dekutree:

suspicious as fuck

LOL

(via pinstripebindi)

Source: unamusedsloth
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14 Aug 13:54

A post about language, ableism, and words

Denise

Interesting read. Much "disability awareness" education emphasizes person-first language, but I've always felt kind of weird (even uncomfortable) about it in certain cases. This piece has led me to read more on the difference between identity-first and person-first language, and I think I'll be taking a very nuanced approach to it in the future, and will try to be mindful of how the individual person prefers to be acknowledged, if their difference needs to be acknowledged at all.

[Content warning: some discussion of specific slurs and ableist statements]

I’ve been wanting to talk about this for a while now, but ironically, I haven’t had the words.

I care about language; it would be hard for a writer not to. For instance, I prefer identity-first language to person-first language, largely because I have considered the arguments for it and agree with them. When speaking about myself or about others with disabilities similar to mine, I try very hard to make use of this language.

I also don’t really care that much how other people refer to me.

Language is an act that occurs in context, and I care more about context and intent than I do about language. If I need help and you’re helping me, for example, in some way that involves referring to my neurotype in front of others, then I don’t really care if you call me an “autistic person”, an “Aspie”, a “person who has autism”, even the dreaded “high-functioning” – whatever. As long as it’s what works in the situation we’re in. If you say something really weird, I might gently bring it up with you later. But mostly, I care that you’re helping.

(Though, of course, claiming you’re “helping” does not give you a free pass. I care that you’re helping cluefully, effectively, and with my consent. But that’s another post.)

I’m also a fan of reclaiming slurs, although that’s neither here nor there.

Many people are more upset by person-first language, or by other language-related matters, than I am. That’s fine, and it’s a thing one should take into account when deciding how to talk. But I think on some level most of us are like this. We care how we, and others like us, are treated. Language is one part of that. It can be important but is not always the most important part, and I think very few of us really believe that it is.

Social justice people get accused of being the “PC language police”, but in my experience, the worst offenders when it comes to pointless PC language (more about the term “PC” below) are very privileged people who don’t actually care about any of this.

A friend of mine told me a story once about an American politician who stated publically that people who are “mentally retarded” should be happy to work for only pennies an hour. (Because yes, it is still legal to pay that little to certain classes of disabled people in certain classes of job.)

After public outcry ensued, the politician apologized, and explained that he had misspoken. He had meant to say that “intellectually disabled” people should be happy to work for only pennies an hour.

I don’t think anybody actually found this reassuring.

If you ever hear me use the term “politically correct” non-ironically, then this is likely what I mean. People in power who carefully sanitize their language without actually caring about context, or about the effects of their actions on the people they are talking about.

It’s possible to be very, very dehumanizing and emotionally abusive without ever using the “wrong” words or the “wrong” tone. It’s possible to dress dehumanization up in a nearly-unlimited number of kittens, rainbows, and reassurances. It’s possible to do it with exactly the terminology and speech style of the people you are dehumanizing. It still is what it is, and if we critique only the surface features of language, we’ll never fix it.

However, even though it is not one of the battles I choose for myself, critiquing the surface features of language can be important. I don’t want to shame anybody who does choose this battle, or to suggest that their concerns are not worth hearing.

And, while it’s easy to go on, say, Tumblr and find people who seem to be focusing on language to the exclusion of all else, I’ve come to the conclusion that this is rarely what’s actually going on. Sometimes people choose that battle for themselves because they recognize it as a battle someone has to fight, and one that they have the tools for; that doesn’t mean they believe there are no other worthy battles. Sometimes people are genuinely upset by certain terms or language forms and need to talk about it. Sometimes people talk about language in one place, and other issues in another place. Sometimes people want to make a deeper critique of someone’s attitudes, but have trouble doing so without pointing to specific words and saying “see, that.” All of these things, and others, are valid.

(Though there are some related problems that should be talked about. Such as “punching sideways”, in which a marginalized person tries to talk about their experience and is shouted down by other marginalized people – or, worse, “allies” – because they didn’t use the correct terms. I want to talk about this but I don’t have my thoughts in order about it and can’t right now.)

In the meantime – and I can only say this for myself, personally, never for other autistic people – as long as it’s clear in context that you actually do have my back, and are actually listening when I talk to you, then you can call me whatever seems reasonable to you. And when referring to yourself, you can use whatever language you damn well please. I don’t, and shouldn’t, mind.

That is all.

Originally published at Ada-Hoffmann.com. You can comment here or there.

08 Aug 04:00

August 08, 2014

Denise

Yep. This is DEFINITELY how funding works.


If you're interested in parasites, Kelly did an interview.
08 Aug 04:00

Meteor

Denise

I love geo-nerds (Marcella! You must read the mouse-over!)

No, only LAVA is called 'magma' while underground. Any other object underground is called 'lava'.
04 Aug 04:00

Thesis Defense

Denise

I suspect my dissertation defense would have played out like this, if I hadn't decided I wanted sanity more than I wanted a PhD.

MY RESULTS ARE A SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT ON THE STATE OF THE AAAAAAAAAAAART
31 Jul 07:00

strip for July / 31 / 2014 - Nature's Anti-Depressant

Denise

BA-THOONK

01 Aug 11:38

T-Shirts & Apparel : Superhero Diaper Covers

Denise

Hmmm, should I order one of these for a certain person who might be having someone to wear this sometime soon?

Your baby's super in our book Instead of worrying about the tights and the tiara and the utility belt, just put on this diaper cover, complete with cape, in your choice of Batman or Superman. $9.99
31 Jul 17:14

I don’t need feminism becuz gots hedgehog. (Feminism haet...



I don’t need feminism becuz gots hedgehog.

(Feminism haet hedgehog.)

Confused Cats Against Feminism is a project of We Hunted the Mammoth

31 Jul 01:42

I don’t need feminism because you do not exist — Confused...



I don’t need feminism because

you do not exist

Confused Cats Against Feminism is a project of We Hunted the Mammoth

31 Jul 01:31

I don’t need Feminism because my life is perfect. Unless...



I don’t need Feminism because my life is perfect. Unless Feminism is this pillow? Then I need it.

-

Confused Cats Against Feminism is a project of We Hunted the Mammoth

24 Jul 11:30

Your cat has a cooler house than I do.

by thebloggess
Denise

WANT

Go home, everybody.  The best cat toy ever has been created and nothing you buy for your cat will ever be impressive again.

star wars catMy cats just looked at this picture from their cardboard box on the floor and then shook their tiny heads at me in disgust and shame.

Frankly, I’m disappointed too.  Why don’t they make these in human size?  It’s like a loft bed without having to have a loft.  Plus, if you just got comfortable but you need a drink you can just drive your bed to the fridge.  If they put a bathroom and a well-stocked bookshelf in there I’d probably never leave again.

PS.  In case you missed it…yesterday a lot of you expressed envy at my horrific 80’s cat sweater, so I found you something even better.  It’s at the bottom of the post.

25 Jul 14:02

16 Shakespearean Insults To Unleash In Everyday Life

Denise

May need to click the link to see - but have some Shakespearean insults with ADDED CAT!

Titus Andronicus.

Henry IV, Part One.

As You Like It.

Measure For Measure.

Henry IV, Part Two.

Henry IV, Part One.

Henry IV, Part One.

King Lear.

The Taming Of The Shrew.

Henry IV, Part One.

The Two Gentlemen Of Verona.

Macbeth.

Henry IV, Part One.

All's Well That Ends Well.

Henry IV, Part One.

King Lear.


All photos via Shutterstock unless otherwise stated.

30 Jun 04:00

Subduction License

'Dude, why can't you just be a normal roommate?' 'Because I'm coming TOWARD you!'
24 Jun 15:00

Five Lessons I Learned From Dealing with Depression

by Eric Ravenscraft
Denise

Yep. Don't agree with everything specific (and she points out that it is specific for her, so no fault) - BUT, like Hyperbole and a Half, her general experience has been the same as mine. Even when I'm not actively in the pit, I'm still fundamentally shaped by my depression. I'm always an impostor. I feel horrible much of the time, for no "good" reason. Even when I'm up, I have to work at convincing myself that my illogical thoughts are not reality, because my reality is that I'm no good even when I "know" I am. It is so very hard to explain to those who have only had episodic or situational depression.

Five Lessons I Learned From Dealing with Depression

Depression is a hard topic to talk about. It's an even harder thing to live through. I've lived with depression for more than two decades. After a while, there were a few things I learned about how to get by without giving up.

Read more...








24 Jun 02:47

Photo



18 Jun 14:00

It's Dangerous to Go Holmes Alone

Denise

I'd take Watson with me, indeed!

It's Dangerous to Go Holmes Alone

Submitted by: Unknown

Tagged: TV , Sherlock , take one