Chivalry is a zombie.
(My boyfriend and I have been doing the long-distance thing for the last five of the nine months we’ve been dating. My birthday is a few days before Christmas. We have made plans to have me meet his mom on that day. He plans to give me both a Christmas gift and a birthday gift. Although I’m the sentimental sort, I’ve been wracking my brain trying to think of what to give to him. I’m trying to get him to reveal anything I can use to make a meaningful gift for him that he’ll like.)
Me: “I’m trying to come up with some ideas for what to do to celebrate Christmas with you in some way. I want to do something special, but my imagination’s lacking.”
Boyfriend: “I am not ignoring you. Just got home five minutes ago. Eating mac and cheese. And anything is special as long as it’s with you.”
Me: “HOW!? You are wonderful. I can’t help wondering how you do it? Make me feel like I do?’”
Boyfriend: “Thank my mom for raising a gentleman. Chivalry isn’t dead; it’s a boss.”
Me: “A thousand times I thank her. Chivalry is a zombie. People thought they’d killed it, but it keeps coming back. And totally wants women for their brains.”
That is just what they would expect us to think.