do you guys remember that one post about how men feel entitled to take up so much space and women have to deal with a lot less?
This is actually a documented thing. You always see men on the subway or tube or whatever using both armrests while women sit with their arms hunched together into their laps. That’s why I always make a point to take up at least one if not both armrests of the tube so men can be uncomfortable for once.
^ again, for all the people telling me posting this picture is complaining too much.
In my college classes (and high school too) guys were always stretching, sticking fists and elbows in my face, leaning their heads back over my desk, over my work, spreading their legs out, kicking my bag with their dirty shoes. And let’s not pretend they were in other guys’ space as much as they were in women’s.
It’s so true, this happens to me every day on the train. Same with the walking thing, women will weave out of the way whereas men just walk straight and plow down anything in their path. I always end up playing chicken with men on the sidewalk now, because I refuse to move out of their way.
I love playing chicken with dudes who hog the sidewalk. BODY CHECK! Fucking assholes.
“NOT ALL MEN ARE LIKE THIS!” FUCK OFF.
“AS A MAN, I THINK THAT…” FUCK OFF.
Men always have the same defensive bullshit to spout every time they get called out on their shit. AND IT IS BORING. They remind me of those toys where you pull a string an they have like 5 phrases they can say. Over and over and over.
same here with playing chicken, its hilarious sometimes because they get this flash of realization in their eyes that says ‘holy shit, she’s NOT going to move/??? what do????’ because THEY ARE SO USED TO EVERYONE MOVING FOR THEM
when i was younger my grandpa drew this on a piece of paper,
and he asked me how i, as the red circle, would get around the two people (black circles) if i was walking down the street.
so of course i came back with
moving out of the way for them as i walked.
he asked me if i thought men would do the same and, at the time, i did because i thought it was just common courtesy. but he told me that men would barrel straight through without giving a shit and that i should do the exact same. because i was the one walking and they were the ones in the way. so that’s exactly what i do.
i find this really fascinating because this actually what defines so-called masculine and feminine traits and gestures. the whole limp-wrist thing? that’s someone decreasing the amount of space they take up by not extending their arm fully. same with crossing one’s legs, how it’s considered more masculine to swing your shoulders when you walk creating a wider gait instead of your hips, how someone who holds their elbows tightly into their torso instead of letting them fall more loosely at their sides is considered feminine.
taking up space is not just a frequent habit of males in our culture, its actually how society thinks masculinity is supposed to be expressed.
It’s also why you can seriously freak people out if you’re a woman by sitting back in your chair and draping your arm over the backrest of the one beside it.
It’s claiming space, and more importantly, it’s powerful body language. In primates (including humans), the individual that “opens” its chest—that is, leaves it open to attack—is the most dominant of them, precisely because it shows a confidence that no one WILL attack you.
Look at someone who’s comfortable vs someone who’s uncomfortable—the uncomfortable person will inevitably cross their arms or cover their chest to in an instinct to protect the thoracic cavity.
So, when you want to look HELLA confident, open up your chest and make direct eye contact. It feels weird (for women!) at first, but it’s the fastest way to freak a dude out. They genuinely do not know what to do when a woman displays behaviour they recognize as confident.
I used to work in downtown DC, not far from the White House, and when I walked around to go to lunch, or to and from the Metro, I would always refuse to get out of the way of the Very Important Men In Suits. I would brace myself and shoulder check them and let them apologize to me for it.
The best was when I was huge and pregnant and did it. A coworker and I were walking to lunch, and he dropped behind me because there were people coming toward us and the sidewalk was narrow, and I was moved as far over as I could and the dudes in suits coming still weren’t out of my way, so he saw me drop my shoulder and brace and let the guy just run right into me.
And you better believe that asshole was apologetic.
CREDIT: The Satanic Temple
The Supreme Court’s recent Hobby Lobby decision, which allowed some for-profit companies to claim a religious exemption to Obamacare’s contraception mandate, has sparked a heated debate over the definition of religious liberty and its role in modern society. At this point, even a Satantic cult has decided to weigh in.
The Satanic Temple — a faith community that describes itself as facilitating “the communication and mobilization of politically aware Satanists, secularists, and advocates for individual liberty” — has launched a new campaign seeking a religious exemption to certain anti-abortion laws that attempt to dissuade women from ending a pregnancy. The group says they have deeply held beliefs about bodily autonomy and scientific accuracy, and those beliefs are violated by state-level “informed consent” laws that rely on misleading information about abortion risks.
Now that the Supreme Court has ruled in favor of Hobby Lobby, the Satanists point out, it strengthens their own quest to opt out of laws related to women’s health care that go against their religious liberty. “Because of the respect the Court has given to religious beliefs, and the fact that our our beliefs are based on best available knowledge, we expect that our belief in the illegitimacy of state mandated ‘informational’ material is enough to exempt us, and those who hold our beliefs, from having to receive them,” a spokesperson for the organization said in a statement.
The Satanic Temple, sometimes referred to as “the nicest Satanic cult in the world,” falls somewhere between satire, performance art, and activism. The group says its central mission is to “encourage benevolence and empathy among all people, reject tyrannical authority, advocate practical common sense and justice, and be directed by the human conscience to undertake noble pursuits guided by the individual will.” It has a set of seven tenets that closely track with humanism. Typically, wherever issues of church and state are overlapping, the Satanic Temple isn’t far behind.
Members of the Satanic Temple first made national headlines when they rallied in support of Florida Gov. Rick Scott (R) for approving a bill that allows prayer in public schools, saying they’re glad the new policy will allow children to pray to Satan. Since then, they’ve also held “a formal ceremony celebrating same-sex unions” on the grave of the mother of the leader of the Westboro Baptist Church, declaring that she has posthumously become a lesbian, and commissioned a seven-foot-tall Satanic statue near a monument to the Ten Commandments at the Oklahoma State Capitol.
And now, the Satanic Temple is turning its attention to “campaigns to assert our religious protection for women with health needs that are being complicated by unreasonable laws,” focusing on the abortion-related legislation that goes against science.
State-level abortion restrictions that aren’t actually based in medicine have swept the nation. “Informed consent” laws, which typically require women to receive biased counseling before being allowed to proceed with an abortion procedure, are now in place in 35 states. Many of those laws require doctors to tell their patients misleading information about abortion’s potential link to mental health issues and breast cancer. Some of them put words directly in doctors’ mouths, forcing them to refer to the fetus as an “whole, separate, unique, living human being.”
Members of the Temple of Satan are encouraging all women who share their belief in medical accuracy to seek their own exemption from these laws, even if they don’t personally identify as Satanists. They’ve drawn up a sample letter to help women talk to their doctors about the issue, as well as created “Right to Accurate Medical Information” t-shirts for purchase.
Satanists aren’t the only activists fighting back against the junk science used to justify anti-abortion laws. The secular humanist group Center for Inquiry recently launched a “Keep Health Care Safe and Secular” campaign to encourage more Americans to fight back against laws limiting women’s access to health services. Similarly, NARAL Pro-Choice America sometimes uses the slogan “Politicians Make Crappy Doctors.”
The post Satanists Demand Religious Exemption From Abortion Restrictions, Cite Hobby Lobby Ruling appeared first on ThinkProgress.
This month, a Senate committee held a hearing on whether to halt the growing number of state laws reducing access to abortion services in the name of protecting women's health. The "expert" testimony revealed just how much these laws rely on fringe science and discredited research.
Zeynep Tufekci's scathing response to the establishment consensus that tech will create new jobs to replace the ones we've automated away makes a lot of good points. Read the rest
It may sound like the last thing you want to do, but The Art of Manliness explains why you should grab your shower cap, bite your lip, and jump into an ice-cold shower.
It probably seems confusing. Women* making statements like “Misandry doesn’t exist, there’s no such thing as misandry” in one moment, and identifying as misandrist in the next.
What is misandry?
Misandry is generally defined as a hatred of men, while misogyny is the hatred of women. Misandry is often used synonymously with the term “reverse-sexism”. However, misandry as praxis is not real. I’ll say it again:
Misandry as praxis is not real.
For misandry to actually be a real belief system with real consequences, it would need to be an institutionalized practice. There would have to be a centuries-old system in place in which men are treated as inferior to women, by women (as well as men with “internalized misandry”). And there is no human society in which that is true.
Sexism = prejudice + power
For misandry to be a legitimate threat to men, there would have to be a consistent pattern of discrimination against men BY women. If misandry were real, men would be suffering from lower pay for equal work, disproportionate objectification, dehumanization, and lack of representation in the media, discriminatory reproductive laws, being regularly told how to modify behavior in order to not be victimized by criminals, and being blamed and shamed after falling victim to a serious sex crime. And all those things would need to be enforced by women. It is true, there are some effects of patriarchy in place by which men do not benefit; in fact they are harmed by them. But those systems generally reinforce gender roles and are in place overwhelmingly because other men (namely wealthy, white men) wrote and enforce those laws.
Why be misandrist?
So we’ve established that there is no actual such thing as misandry.
So why do so many feminists use the word and identify as “misandrist”?
Of course, all people who identify as misandrist have their own reasons. Some of those reasons I’ve witnessed include
- It’s a tongue-in-cheek joke among some feminists, mainly on the internet, which for the most part began as a reaction to men pushing back against our desire for female liberation (because to privileged men, the concept of women gaining rights means they must automatically lose rights)
- It’s a defense mechanism by women who have, exclusively at the hands of men, suffered myriad forms of aggression, micro-aggression, violence, pain, violation, and dehumanization. It seems that a high number of women who identify online as misandrist are in fact survivors. For a person to have experienced systemic and personal discrimination and based on their gender, by a person of a different gender, a hatred of the oppressor is an valid and understandable reaction to have.
- It is used by women to get a rise out of men who, for so many centuries, have used sexist, anti-woman humor to reinforce women’s societal role as second class citizens. We grow up hearing men tell countless jokes about domestic violence, rape, reinforcement of gender roles, and the mocking of female bodies and body types. Because of this, it can be highly entertaining to witness a man throw a tantrum upon hearing a single joke in which HIS gender is mocked and mistreated. For him, a joke at his expense is a rare and shocking occurrence. For women, it is a part of every day conversation.
- It is a continuation of feminism and fills in the areas where feminism leaves off or lacks aggression against the oppression we face. As quoted from an earlier post in which I define my personal reason for identifying with misandry: “Men have a lot of privileges that NO ONE should have, not even oppressed groups. Being able to sexually assault people and not be held accountable or punished, being glorified for taking advantage of others, using power and privilege to hurt and mock those that lack power to defend themselves, being treated like you’re immune to criticism and fault, etc. Saying women should have equality potentially implies women should have the right to do all those things too.
- Misandry is not a hatred of every individual man but a hatred of patriarchy, the male-dominated system that allows sexism to permeate every aspect of our lives without challenge. Misandry means hatred of a system in which the masculine is glorified and the feminine is deprecated.
These are just a few of the reasons that I’ve heard self-identified misandrists use. Just as every lived experience of sexism and oppression for us has manifested differently, how we all react to it is different. Some women form a strong belief of internalized that misogyny and try to integrate with men as much as possible while publicly denouncing the behavior and voices of other women. Some women absolutely hate men, with impassioned fervor. Some women become activists and throw themselves at the cause of fighting for equality. Some women hide in the shadows and hope for the best.
I can’t say I’ve ever actually met a single woman who actually had a deep hatred for men on an individual and all-encompassing level. Despite facing discrimination by men every single day, I see women most often direct any hatred they feel towards the system we live in that allows this type of oppression to continue. We still have men in our lives that we love and adore and would die for, and it makes it that much more painful knowing that those same men we love have been conditioned since birth to see us as somehow inferior.
All these and other reactions that women have to the systemic oppression of our gender are defense mechanisms, meant to effectively keep ourselves as safe as possible. Misandry is, like these, a reaction to the treatment we face every day. How we define it and how it manifests in us may vary widely. But most often we say “misandry” and then laugh when men cower or become enraged at its mention because, in reality, it is really no threat to them.
*For the sake of simplicity and making this post as readable as possible to people who have little understanding those outside the gender binary, I’m use the term “men” to generally mean “cis-men”, and when I reference “women” I include MOGII people as a group systemically oppressed by patriarchy.
We still have men in our lives that we love and adore and would die for, and it makes it that much more painful knowing that those same men we love have been conditioned since birth to see us as somehow inferior.
This week’s link round up features 5 videos to watch on repeat until it turns into the weekend. Enjoy!
Pygmy Goats dancing to Hall and Oates! Hall and Goats!
You can watch Tina Fey and Rachel Dratch’s old Second City Show in its entirety. Cue Hallelujah chorus peppered with 90s VHS static.
T.J. Miller perfects the art of the morning show interview.
Mary Poppins quits her job, as played by Kristen “Good At Everything Ever” Bell. (VIDEO)
Jenny Slate has a pony phobia.
A reader throws down the gauntlet in our new contest (guidelines here): “For me, Johnny Cash’s version of Nine Inch Nails’ “Hurt” takes the cake.” He has a point:
Songwriter Trent Reznor’s quote is worth reading:
I pop the video in, and wow… Tears welling, silence, goose-bumps… Wow. [I felt like] I just lost my girlfriend, because that song isn’t mine anymore… It really made me think about how powerful music is as a medium and art form. I wrote some words and music in my bedroom as a way of staying sane, about a bleak and desperate place I was in, totally isolated and alone. [Somehow] that winds up reinterpreted by a music legend from a radically different era/genre and still retains sincerity and meaning — different, but every bit as pure
It really builds and builds …
Always reblog, because I’ve noticed the media salivating over all these *white* weed entrepreneurs for being so “ingenious” and “savvy businessmen”, while ignoring the the mostly Black, Brown and poor victims and survivors of Amerikkka’s “War On Drugs”, and the ongoing racist and classist injustices that keep locking away Black, Brown and poor people in masses while giving white people who commit the same offenses less or no jail time at all.
And it costs like $8,000 non-refundable application fee to even get started running a legal weed shop.
WHO had access to that kinda money?
The fact that the ALA shared this link is so gloriously bitter and angry and I love it.
Is there a portmanteau for that? Angritter? Bangry?
My library card already gets me multiple “real” books, e-books, audiobooks, magazines and movies per month. For free.
Kindle Unlimited offers nothing from big presses, and no guarantee the authors will get paid fairly for their work. Libraries buy the book up front for a higher price (and a better binding). Kindle Unlimited offers the authors a variable percentage of a as-yet-undetermined-and-unannounced amount of money.
While Amazon touts Kindle Unlimited at “Netflix For Books!” the reality is Netflix signed contracts with everyone whose work they offer so that actors, screen writers, best boys, and the rest of those people get paid for the shows and movies you watch. Amazon does not.
That means your favorite author isn’t being compensated for their time or work. If you love a book series and want to see the next one get published: buy the book or hit the library. Starving authors quit writing because they like eating.
Earlier this month, the World Health Organization (WHO) released guidelines for helping to prevent the spread of HIV in key populations. The group, which also monitors the globe for pandemic outbreaks, says we have to decriminalize sex work and drugs if we want to stop HIV.
Readsy is a free web service that makes speed reading or focusing on any online article or web site easy. Just paste in the text or the URL, and the site guides you through a rapid reading of the content.
If you don’t know…
Black excellence on 100
#even more amazingly#phillis wheatley wasn’t a servant#she was a straight up SLAVE#in a time when white ppl believed that black people were physically incapable of reading or writing#she had to go before a panel of 12 judges#plus her master#in order to prove she wrote her book#she was INCREDIBLY FAMOUS as well#she was going to meet the queen but then she had to go back to america because her mistress got sick#phillis wheatley#LITERALLY UNBELIEVABLE WOMAN#luv her#also excellent poet so hey hey hey (x) because people should know this